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I depend too much
on other's reactions
to set me free.
Scrambling around,
cannot breathe.
That I wish
I dug deeper.
To expose the veins and arteries,
That to this day keep me alive.

That I wish
My hands could hold more pills.

That I wish
I wasn’t born.

I don’t want to be here.
I hate it.

Why can’t i be normal
 Apr 2020 Benji James
Maja
Save me if you must.
Love me if you dare.
Turn me into dust.
Leave me if you care.
A short poem about something.
What is still not certain. But then again, is anything?
 Apr 2020 Benji James
michaela
i was forced to learn not to care when you didn’t need me;
i had to rip my own heart out and hide it so it couldn’t deceive me.
when you didn’t need me i was forced not to care about you
how can you expect me to care when you do?
 Apr 2020 Benji James
sayrinne
...
 Apr 2020 Benji James
sayrinne
...
my heart’s still here,
waiting for you to hear
screaming your name,
but for you
t’was just a game.
 Apr 2020 Benji James
'Melia
Daily,
I fight over whether to resurrect
memories of savory heat and the humming of your body
or the distaste for my opinions dripping from your tongue.

I will be pulled forever.
But not by your hand.
 Apr 2020 Benji James
Eva B
Pout at me
I'll drool
with you.
We'll wet
together.
Wiggle and
deceive me.
 Apr 2020 Benji James
Zywa
The postcard, growing yellow
for so long

No contact
I don't have an address
to do anything about it

Besides, said in thoughts
my words are silting up
with caution

We only share the wind
that covers us

with sand from South
pollen from East, rain from West
and from North the cold comes

Then I pull a sweater
over my heart, stroke
with my fingers

on my one belly
thinking of your hands
Collection "Pending rain"
 Apr 2020 Benji James
Eloisa
Longer sleepless evenings
Humid, dark, and bleak
Serene and sorrowful homes
Blossoming sakura trees weep
With heavyhearted lonely buds
Spring, unforgettable saddest spring
Trees not lovelier and so are fields
Nor the day more delightful than the evening
These unhappy blooms in pink
Signal a different kind of grief
Sakura  (cherry blossoms) are constantly cited as the most recognizable sign of spring in Japan. When trees all over the country burst into breathtakingly beautiful clusters of pink flowers right about the time it gets warm enough, people  yearly go outside to enjoy. Blooming of the sakura is a beautiful  gift from mother nature, hanami (sakura viewing) is done by many people in spring.  But due to COVID-19 pandemic, parks right now are being closed to avoid more transmission of SARSCoV2.
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