Deep in heart there will forever be a place
Existing only to hold the image of your face
I've tried but no words fingers could write
Accurately describe your beauty and light
There always will be a piece of you inside of me
Every time I look into a mirror that's what I see
Through glass familiar lines echo out your name
Traces of you distinctly formed in the woman I became
I speculate upwards to the sky
Wondering where you are
For a brief second heaven doesn’t seem so far
Yearning to go back to when my story was new
I could do things different and change the way I treated you
You spent many years watching me play and grow
Sweating in sun
Shivering in snow
You wore out bones making sure I had it all
Bending backwards to my every beck and call
I'd climb tree branches all the way to the top
Until you witnessed me up there and your heart would drop
Then yell for me to get down
Concerned as hell
I would roll my eyes and comply although I rarely ever fell
I was too youthful to appreciate how much you cared
To comprehend the importance of each memory shared
I recall how you stayed up until dawn
Sewing costumes
Stifling every yawn
Or helping craft projects for school
Hosting sleepovers so I could feel cool
On picture day you would wake up early and curl my hair
Pick out a matching outfit to wear
You stood up for me no matter what
If asked you would be there no ifs, ands, or buts
Like in 6th grade when teacher wanted me to change my shirt in class
The words depicted had (in his opinion) "too much sass"
You and dad drove down and gave him a piece of your minds
He admitted defeat by rules dress code defined
I'll never forget feeling of invincibility
Regardless of situation never failed to put your faith in me
As a teenager began to fued and fight
Didn't value your verdict because I believed I was right
Didn't understand the reason for your overprotective ways
Where you came from
Positive you were out to make me miserable by not letting me have fun
But now I am older I see the picture all too clear
Decisions were based not on my character; but fear
And I'm grateful you loved me enough to insist on saying no
Instead of letting run wild anywhere I wanted to go
It took a decade to forgive you and grow wise
Should have listened sooner so I would have realized
That family is a blessing
Cherish and hold near
Because you never expect someone to disappear
I am guilty of not clutching you tighter while I could
Thanks to you I've lived a life with so much good
You were the best mother in the world
Should have informed you of that more
I keep wishing for everything to be like before
If you viewed me now I know you'd want me to be stronger
I will miss you for an eternity Mom
And love you even longer
I wrote this and read it aloud at my mom's celebration of life on Sunday