and it just hurts ya know? I wanted to be that person for you
I wanted everything to be okay.
there was a time and a place for us and I know that now but it doesn't stop me from wanting you

I could never just let things go.

always digging up the graves
of past conflicts laid to rest.

always picking at the scabs,
making sure they left a scar.

I never wanted to forget

The walls I've built
are made of glass
nothing is left to the imagination
everything inside lay bare for
your viewing.
but
they are still walls
fortified and bulletproof
there is nothing you can do but watch
as I break myself over and over again

but these are petty kindnesses,
stitched together with the
fear of being seen as cold

do not pretend your words hold
any meaning other than the
selfish need to placate yourself

all you had to say was

"I'm sorry"

a gentle safety awaits
in your arms

{but then, you've never been gentle}

a comforting predictability
in your presence

{still, I've never known what to expect}

you make me feel loved

{you are all that I have left}

I love you

{I am so alone}