"Senpai, are you okay?" you ask as I stare once again. Your steel pools look into my purple orbs, full of worry.
'God, how I wish you'd look at me the same way you look at cheesecake.' is what I wish to say, but all that comes out is a harsh "Fine.".
'Why can't I just say what I feel with ease?'
"Senpai, look at the birdies!!" you squeal like a child, even though you're seventeen. The birds fly in the garden, just like the butterflies in my stomach. And I almost smile...
'How do you manage to make me smile when all I want to do is cry?' is what I wish to ask, but all that is said is a cold "Be quite, brat.".
'Why is it so hard to express my mind?'
"Senpai, look at my new dress!" I look up only to blush, it goes unnoticed by you. But not by our friend of music, who stands with a smirk behind you. The blood red dress reaches your mid thighs and flows like a river. Long sleeves just the way you like it, to hide the scars. A white ribbon tied around your waist defines your curve.
'You look gorgeous, as always.' is the complement I wish to give, but all that comes out is a sharp "What's the point?".
'Why is it so hard to complement you?'
"Senpai, I got you a present!" you hold a black and purple box in front of me, while dressed in a Santa dress and gray tights. Something our friends probably made you wear...
'You shouldn't have bought me something, being with you is enough.' is what I wish to preach, but all that is spoken is a bored "What is it?". And you pull out a silver chain with a silver snowflake that holds a red jewel in the center. You hook it around my neck with a giggle. And I fall in love with you even more...
'Why do you still stay with me despite knowing what i'm capable of?'
"Senpai, you're bleeding!" I look down and see blood seeping through my sleeve. My eyes widen, as I hold my wrist and swiftly walk out of the room. "Senpai, are you okay?!" you ask in a panic as you follow, but I stop you.
'Please save me from myself...' is the plead I wish to put in the air, but all that comes out is the acidic toned "Go away!". That night you stayed by my side, despite my pleas to leave.
'Why do you still care about me when all I do is speak harshly?'
"Senpai, do you hate me?" the question I've always dreaded hearing.
'No, Scarlet I don't hate you. I love you.' is the confession I wish to voice, but all that comes out is a simple "No.".
'Why do you make me so nervous with a single word, or just your presence?'
"Senpai, have you drank tonight?" you ask looking at me as we dance to a slow song. Your dress fanning out as I spin you.
'No, i'm trying to stop, like you've asked me to.' is the gospel I wish to share, but all that comes out is a single "No.".
'Why do you still have faith in me after I've let you down so many times?'
Every question in my mind starts with a Why or a How, and are directed to you. You're all I think about day and night, trying to figure out how to tell you how I feel. Yet, I can't even speak my mind!
When I fell, you helped me up.
When I was lost, you led the way.
When I yelled, you remained soft spoken.
When I became violent, you became the voice of peace.
When I was harsh, you were kind.
When I was hateful, you were joyful.
Complete opposites.
The Sun and the Moon
Light and Dark
Water and Fire
Yet you stay by my side, but why?!
I'm the monster and you're the little girl.
I'm the hunter and you're the hunted.
I'm the demon and you're the angel.
All I do is corrupt you, so why stay?!
"Senpai, I stay because I love you. Not as a friend or family. But as a partner in crime, in life."
Those words, made me think it was just a dream at first. Until I felt you wrap your arms around me. I open my mouth to speak the words I so many times before wished to say.
"........"
God ****** why can't I speak!!
Eyes flare from electric violet to ice blue, an animalistic growl sounds in the night. I grab you by the collar and finally get my message across, without words. And all this time I tried to speak when I simply had to give a small peck like in the sappy movies.
And finally my fantasy's turn to reality...
I finally tell you I love you without words, but with action.
And you make all the wrongs right...
You make all the nightmares disappear...
You make all the flaws qualities...
And finally, after years of frowning.... I smile, a smile of sharp teeth.... that none of you fear, and I feel accepted at last.....
*I finally feel peace...
not yet finished. still in the process of being written.
update #1: still in the making but getting close to done. - 3/23/2017 12:30
update #2: alright it's coming to a close. -3/27/2017
update #3: and it's complete! I hope you all like this it is different from what I normally write, but this was requested by a friend. It is about a group of people who are not normal. And the character of which the poem is told from is A.) a girl and B.) in love with her close friend, but has difficulty saying so.
Again I hope you liked it!