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Bluie May 2017
you lied
and told me
you love me

a year has gone
yet the pain lingers on....
Bluie Mar 2016
blank
nothing
emptiness
i don't know what to feel
something requires acceptance, i guess
but i do not know what
i do not know how
i do not know if i should
maybe we're just not meant to be
that's what the universe is telling us all along
P.S. you're still my 2AM thoughts
Bluie Apr 2016
we had the chance:
to talk to each other
to explain what happened
to understand things

& I had the chance:
to find a way
to ask questions
to tell you how much you meant

the last two months
and five days
were spent not talking to you

in those days
there would've been
countless moments
turned to wonderful memories

we've had more than
two years with each other
and almost half of it
was spent ignoring
but never not missing the other

you're farther away now

and i'm actually afraid:
of the uncertainty
of where we'll be years from now
of how things will turn out

but there's no other way to find out than live this life & wait

hopefully
after long years
(and who knows how long),
we'll see each other again

& despite the changes
that'll happen
to each of us,
hopefully,
it'll only lead us
to becoming better
& ready
for whatever it is
that is still yet to come

by that time
may we face life
and conquer it together

& if the time comes
that we'll once again
need to part,
may the time
we've shared together
give each other
more reasons to return

until one day
these reasons will be enough
for us never to leave
each other's side
Bluie Apr 2016
i'd love to believe
the universe will soon
let us be together
at the right time
in the right place
with every bit of us
being nothing but
right for each other
'til next time..
i'll wait for you
for as long as I can
Bluie Mar 2016
you're probably asleep right now
while I'm here lying in my bed
thinking about how much I like you
and how badly I miss you

I hope you're dreaming

maybe not about me
maybe not about "us"

but I just want you to dream..

something that's good
something that's nice
something worth remembering
when you wake up in the morning
Bluie Mar 2016
here we go again
the getting-to-know-each-other part
the trusting part
the infidelity part
the breaking-of-hearts part
and the i-will-never-trust-anyone-again part
Bluie Apr 2016
these myriad days
I have to convince myself
that I am okay
Bluie Apr 2016
tell me,
love,
if both
of us
refuse
to fight
for this,
then,
who will?
Bluie Apr 2016
positive charges
were never meant
to be together

so are negatives

opposite charges
on the other hand
attract perfectly
& naturally

i hope
you and i
have opposite
charges
Bluie Apr 2016
paminsan pangungusap
madalas tanong

paminsan nagmumula sa'yo
madalas nanggagaling sa'kin

paminsan kay hirap sabihin
madalas kay sarap pakinggan

paminsan binibitawan
ng may kasiguraduhan
madalas may kalakip
na pagdadalawang isip

paminsan may kahulugan
madalas hindi maintindihan

paminsan walang bakas ng kasinungalingan
madalas di mahagilap ang katotohanan

paminsan tapat at totoo
madalas hanggang panaginip na lamang
Bluie Apr 2016
a couple of times
you've made me so happy
i've thought that:
"no matter what happens,
i wont ever regret us",
not even with this
intense pain
that i'm feeling right now
Bluie Apr 2016
my words
begging to be uttered
will forever be
left unsaid

my apologies
for my mistakes
will never have the chance
to be forgiven

my utmost gratitude
for meeting one like you
will certainly be
unexpressed

my request
for you to stay
will now be
just another plea

my wish
though unrevealed
will always want
to soon be granted

& my love
for you and you only
will always remain
unconfessed
Bluie Mar 2016
how do you measure
intensities of pain?
how do you compare
deep wounds
and broken hearts?
for the nth time,
you're the reason behind my pain
Bluie Mar 2016
while you are asleep
i get to look at my world
peacefully dreaming
Bluie Mar 2016
you were my secret
what else do I have to keep
now that you are gone?
Bluie May 2017
dont make it seem like
you missed the good old days

because i was there
and you were there
but she wasn't
Bluie Mar 2016
(i) I get to see you almost everyday. And as much as I hate seeing you, I know deep down that I keep searching for you in a room full of people.

(ii) your memory lingers: with every place that we had been, with every food I knew you love, with every word I used to hear you say, with every wink that made me blush.

(iii) each night as I lay in bed forcing myself to sleep, I try not to think of you.. but it can't be helped. and even in my dreams, you keep showing up.

(iv) I love how I can smell your scent when you walk from my behind and cover up my eyes. I don't say a word. silently, I'm hoping you'd still do it.

(v) I've been doing all sorts of stuff just to distract myself. but each time I do, the only thing on my mind is how I want to tell you all about those stuff.

(vi) the photos, the messages, your contact number, I just can't force myself to delete it. instead, I reread the messages and look at your pictures whenever I miss you.

(vii) I remember how you held my hand, looked into my eyes and asked if I was okay. you made everything feel better that night. I'm not fine now.

(viii) you keep communicating indirectly. and like a living plant you keep watering the feelings I have for you. you never allow it to die. and I never show it but I badly want to respond.

(ix) I tried to forget about you. I tried to forget the memories. I tried to forget the feelings. I tried to forget that I want you.. I tried to forget about you. I forgot to forget about you.

(x) I bound myself to write poems about you and I keep promising to have my last entry with you in it. but promises keep getting broken and here I am, once again, composing.
Bluie Mar 2016
now you're here
and i'm happy
and i'm sad
and breathing
suddenly seems hard
Bluie Mar 2016
i imagined telling you how i feel
be it the calmest possible way
or the most unimaginable one
*still, neither of it made you love me back
Bluie Mar 2017
now who's to say
that the burden you're carrying
ain't worth a tear

— The End —