Takes deep breath
Lacing my arms to create a nest on my desk
Tucking my face inside
Breathing slowly
Till each breath is half of the last.

Than sufficating under my own
Depression*.

Your over-fried scrambled egg brain...
Your crystal blue toilet water eyes...
Your entangling lucious snake-like locks...
Your enchanting lying lips...
Your snuggled and overly tight embrace...
Your sweet and sufficating breathe...
Your complete and utter toxic love...
Everything about you...
***** me in.

He wrote
inscripted objects
Into my eye

He bountied
For affection
One not
Likely met

She screamed
While sufficating
Her authenticity

He shouted
Yea she'll come back

She wore her wedding gown
Into the dessert
And was found drowned

He wrote
Inscripted objects
Into my eye

The novels now
A mystery
My Life
Total chaos
With a smile

Because he's no
Longer with me
I cry my left eye out

let the state of mind release into peace.
all the stress please leave me alone.
breath by breath all my life flashes behind me.
i'm not going insane but i have that dark heavy feeling that just sufficating.
all the darkness that has pushed me down slowly tearing me apart all around.
all the people in class have said wispers behind my back.
but my fight will never stop sun set to sun rise.
the weight of darkness runs wild like wild fire burning every thing that was beauty. but now lies.
every step i take one foot after the other. my impresion in the sand. will fade away and come back.


i leave to find my cozy safe haven that i can spread my new colorfull wings and warm them up spread them wide.
my safe haven is full of joy no one can find it cause youl just have a fight to get to me.
my breathes show when the cold weather go's.my next *** is a feild of roses that drip the new spring dew.

my life is filled with chaos and hectic things i don't under stand.
what is the reason you only just hold me down and drive me ******* crazy.

i have a safe haven where i just think pondering about my ideas that can change life and improve the blood shed to leave and go away.

my life has been stronger that any one who has try'd fail'd and lost the fight.

but i have a place that is filled with life that never dies i have a place to vent and ponder and let my thoughts out to think about what could change.


YOU CANT DRAG ME DOWN TO GO FIGHT? BUT I"M NOT A FIGHTER I'M A LOVER!!!!!

you could tear me appart by my wings will grow stronger and maybe ill sheil'd you from the bulletsthat will hit you.


i take breathes of air and clear m mind of the danger i will never escape.

but every breath i take makes a new place that i can go to to just release the anger/ that floods my vaines.

im a vary shy person but that never will change the way i see this world threw my eyes of this world that lies to me like paper that burns in the hand of the devil or demonic  ******* that just rip your (*******) (HEART) out.

my shyness lets me just watch this world an all its moves.

to me this world is like a vary vary big (CHESS GAMES) every peace is a pawn that moves to the place where you want to follow a path to lead the king or queen to fredmon.

every breath is seen when the winter starts to let heavy snow fall consume your mind.

the train tracks i walk my tracks stay the snow fall is so thick i will follow till you look ahead and just see me vanish in to the white.

my breath breath the fog on the cold dryry days.

i may be alive but deep down i am scared and beat but yet i still walk this world with no regrets only ideas that can change this corrupt world that only teaches lies that make people riot.

my life is nothing but one big scare.
but ill never just sit down and cry ill just walk this earth till i die.

if it aint black and white peck scratch and bit.

my eyes a vary blue as the kristal waters of of the gates to hell.

my breathes have nothing but ideas and people i want to leave my life.

every breath fills my lunges with energy that i can harn's and breath out fire that is nothing but my stress.

stress has riped my life apart but every new scare of wound ill manage.

my min d is strong as lifes demonic eliments.

ill never let this world leave me behind cause ill always be watching your every move.
every fight i  take in is all the night mars that will **** your soul away leaving nothing but a broken lie .


my safe haven has hid me well away from your ****** up lies that have twisted that ******* smile off your face. my save haven has my life to recover from the **** society  throws my way when darkness fills my lungs i want to go on a ram page that will drown all you out from me.

nothing is great noting is promising nothing is good or bad nothing is good nor evil. life has the rads and paths that you can make life.

i might be quiet by my eyes listen as so ears my words have nothing nice to say but that's only cause were alive.

day by day the weather changes so dose my mood.

but every one in my life is a lie.

my safe haven is my sheild that blockes the words the texts have no effect.


this life with lies have no effect. on me that only creates wounds not love or like.

my simple words words of HATE ANGER  back stabbing words that only dig your own grave that you have started when you were able to starting to talk. talking

life has led  me to insanity or insane but if you just followed a path maybe you can make your own safe haven that will not scare you.

if i tell you it only take one person to start a wave of love caring and compassion to start people to love and follow a way.

it only takes one person who's voice had been silenced in the shadows.

ill take every breath it to take to show you all a world from my point of how i see it to show how life can be made  to survive and maybe ill show you my one idea and path i want to show love.


only one person it takes to spread a world of love .



thank you my  breathing saved my anger now my breathes leave out the  harsh but ill never get knocked down ccause my safe haven has saved me from this world of fear anger hate lies societys tricks but all of tho  have


MADE ME GROW WISE WITH  answeres of life

The scream is silent
But everyone hears it
The scream is sufficating
But everyone ignores it
The scream is building
But no one cares
The scream has gone
But the screamer is too

Every day is new sunrises so do you. even if you feel like you have nothing to say nice.
day by day new challenges fly bye hitting you with out warning. when it rains i rather walk  in the rain so no one can see my eyes . have the time of your life. but it only last only a few min light when your high. when night comes the only thing to escape reality.
the music you listens to carry you along the way with all the wounds that riddle your body.
every thought you think twice but your own ideas have the weight like a ton. your friends have been there for you and so you both have each others backs no matter what.
even if your tired and have little patients all you have to say is ill just keep walking.
the emotions you drown in with every thing the day dreads and loses you in the mix.

but dad by day you have to face your fears even if it means passing you own boundries.

love that emotion is just a ord love is just something that means nothing.

for me i was told when i was little you should never sit down and cry cause youl never have the strong image in you.
emotions walk behind you but your shadow is the thing that has to fight your own evil side to push the demonic eyes away.

life is filled with lies and pathetic people that wast your time.

emotions are the whole thing that human society has to stand therer ground.

day night is the same except that's the way it is night people currl up and let the dreams slumber.

but night is a nother when people only come out when theres no light to hit them.


the thins you said the night before what do u really know what happened to your promises and trust.


my life i walk this earth trying to show my ideas to this world. but this world is afraid of ideas that will change society and every ones time to the good of it.


the emotions have so many things that will bring out in your words.


but i have no regrets or fear what happens to me. cause people fear me and are scared of me for my smarts. but i have nothing negitive to express in my words.


but the sun rises bring the sweet calm breez that flowls threw my long hair but what do u really hear when you listen close. just the music you have never heard of the beauty that will make tears stream down your face.

in my own words you cant fix every thing or every ones problems. all you can be is ears for listening and to suport them untille the end.


i have a life that is full of trapes and surprizes.

im not scared or threaten  by people but why do my ideas scare and threaten society.

but night falls my music plays sun rise comes and my music is still playing but thats the only way for me to deal with life and all its (****)

i walk this world creating my ideas writing away that will spell your name telling you im always listening.

but in this world i can only escape from societys gripps with my music playing loud and drowning people out so i can feel things. in my life as we keep going along.

my life is full of words but my voice will never be heard cause im tired of trying to talk over your voies.


have any emotions like your own appearance ******* you down ******* your strength away wearing you down.

have you just felt your life is and endless ride that leaves burns and blood stains.

my voice has the calming tone's that bring peace to your life.

in my life there's no such thing is war only the rules i have if you show any threat or threaten me i will do the same to you.


every emotion i have been able to control by using my music to drown out every one blaring it away tuning any scream or voice in my way that is only sufficating.


in my own words i have no fears /regrets but i walk this barren world just living and surving any thing hits or breakes me.


but in life/society/emotions. we wont be human if we didn't have any emotions that we have to live with.


i you want folow me  cause youl never have to be alone i am listening to our voice ill say just follow your foot steps and dont let go

I know what you wish- that this love wasn't worth the risk.
painful memories of shattered hearts and broken relations
stalk your soul and whisper words of doubt into your open ears.
you do your best to ignore them,
walking away and praying for them to leave the past and join you in the now-
happiness. contentment. understanding.
that 's all in the now, it is the now, and you, you on the deepest level of your soul
you know this.
and the certainty of this idea, it's oozing from your pores.
filling the air- sufficating!
not in a way that is hurtful or uncomfortable, no.
but as a womb. safe and secure. beautiful.

After struggling to accept my insomina, I realised that there was no point in forcing my sleep and so I just laid there in dark staring at the ceiling awaiting, my sleep.
As the seconds go by I submerge deeper and deeper into my thoughts 
Kinda like meditation, with scatted emtions and memories
Like seeds on an open field.
This rapid thinking eventually lead to a feeling of reminiscence
Envying the feeling of having a clear mind, wanting to have some sort of control over sufficating thoughts and emotions which contribute to my ever rising anxiety. Missing the uncontrolable yet comfortbale feeling of drowsiness that indicates that my sleep is near 
After going through a sea of emotions, I tire myself out and hear muffled sounds of birds chirping and dogs barking, signs of a new day arriving.
And that's when I start to lose control, slowly but surely. My mind is now at ease and I am at peace with my demons, my movements became timid my heavy eyes were shut. And "finally"
I whispered. I fell asleep.

what have i done. my dreams have been silent.  where do i stand when i breath in fire. aner takes all my enery that  i requier.
nothing makes sence when i cant tell if your liying to me.

i cant even open my eyes for how much im tired. all the weight on me. sufficating me cant you see i run away cause you wont listen to me.

only music have never lied. i have tryed to reach out to you.

but im tired of you not caring so i set this wold on fire
my lungs fill with tirer

whats the last thing is i breath out fire with your name on my list

when you have had it all all you want to do is escape from what grips may pull you down to your own memories you want to erase out of your mind. when it rains it washes off the words that sticks deep down in you. but what ideas that have saved your life in the past calming you down.

but when i walk this earth in the rain all the punches and blows only leave bruses but that won't let me speak my mind whit my calm soft spoken words.

my voice is soft in a tone nor threat. but when your word lie i may lose control but the cold rain cools off my paciants.

the cold rain drops make steam off my skin when  i have no idea.


but in this worl my one friend is rain cause it makes life all around us live breath.

i have one walking path to make my path to show every one who needs to find away to survive. even if it mean running threw hell taking the chance to stand up and run till we have found all of our own safe haven.

i have no fear wit what comes next cause its just how this unforgiving world that it shows from its darkest secrets. but what should bee said only when your pushed away from society that you have betrayed from.


your shadows grow long when your eyes turn pure red as evil consums your telling you theres nothing to feel hurt my societ'es sufficating grips that has no end to..


but i have ran threw all the stages and here i have is me writing my own stories of my life that passes by with hope no regrets.


nothing can hold me back or catch me to imprison me.

free as a bird with such a clarity
followed by darkness, is this insanity?
not feeling loved, not feeling wanted
by thoughtconstructions and selfpitty you feel haunted
feeling like paying a visit back to the old days
should one put the middlefinger back up, wait even better, light a couple of jays?
thats what the mind is figuring. just destruction and pain
it feels so crazy one could follow that voice its so insane
yet human conciousness has been identifying with that voice for so long
the human bond to it feels so strong

i follow all this yet i feel too tired to let go

haha silly me, silly mind
letting go is hard i find
but then the next moment everything just.... just vanishes
you feel perplex, what happened? it astonishes
its quite simple, its the mind that wants to make it complicated
light fills your body again, no more feelings of sufficating
just light, bliss, happiness a kiss from above
well just love..

in my life im ling free with rebelian with twist. where i stand is away from society gripsthat just stab you in the back. i'm insane cause i live in a thrill seeking life. if i had to stand to gather in a picture all of you would just run. you cant hold me down cause i have a life to live getting messed up. i wont stand with people cause every day thats where i stand. so **** the rest of you i hav a life to live with no limits cause ideas are bullet proof. your society. but i dont agree with the sufficating lies they spread i cant be held down cause life isnt ready for my hell im about to unleash on you all.
u may take my soul and life but im standing my new ground so **** the rest of you. cause im disobaying your orders you take to me .

if we do ill see you in you own lies to your grave

I am at the edge of my sanity.
I have nerves screaming to be free.
Of the corrupt and sufficating place where my soul has been kept.
No way out. No one even understands to help.
I sink deeper into my void.
Invisible.
Tears wetting the pillow where my head has laid and slept.
I am sick of pretending and compromising.
I need to break free.
Or my insanity shall take it's control and **** the beauty that is me.
Is there a soul, who understands enough of me, to take a risk and join forces with me to bust out of this prison?
There must be.
For I have lost most of my vision.
Banging my head against the wall in restless hours.
Watching everyone else get their dues.
After all my loyalty, respect, and hard work....
Why must I be the one hidden away to be the wreck?
Which never deserves or has earned his repair?
Or are all other souls
much more value of to see the one who is dying there?