"sonja" poems
For my cousin, Chris Goldrick
Lacing my skates
after walking two miles
in girl-strictured delight
Mom's stories of Sonja Henie--
No, not ever
Lacing my skates
with snow-ball pompoms
felt skirt
and nylon tights
Cute little hat with matching scarf
My thighs and fingers
already freezing
icy burn
from miles on foot
to get there
the lake where--
I must get out
I must get OUT!
Knowing what
to expect from my body
the quick-twitch of muscle
Could always sense
specific--
gravity of water
at 22 degrees
Desiring to feel
the motion between ice and steel
Read speed's vibrations through my body
The brain registers relation
to weather's effect
Tell of velocity
possibility of fall
Feel the slash of the blades beneath me
Throw my weight sideways, sudden
to hear that furious hiss
An object in motion tending, dire
to stay in motion
Threatening to stay there
always
in its heights-- of speed
away--
from the crowds of skaters
swirling distant in the lights
Seeking instead
the farthest reaches of Porter Lake
speed and speed and more
to overcome
inertia
of what it is to become
undone
at the outer edges, of humanity
A force
centrifugal unto myself
Avoiding
Pregnant and slow
with years and babes....
The best
must be broken and tamed
of what it takes to stay free
catching the edges with every stride
catching my toe in the quick
180
spray of frost
to the sudden still
Listen to the frigid chill
and the heave of my breath
tumbling into evidence
Gliding
Once
Forever--
on, into darkness
of woods on frozen water
The wildness of it all
So infatuated with flight
so full of grace
I forgot Sonja
The moon rose
from her seat in the treetops
and applauded
Jul 17, 2018
Jul 17, 2018 at 3:54 PM UTC
Dark waters claim the lily pads,
Delicate greens shatter, blacken, and sink—
Deeper, deeper into shadows they wade,
To be alive in their mortality.
As cold twilight wraps them in tender embrace,
A mortal heart cannot love what cannot decay;
To love, to lose—such fleeting beauty lies.
-Sonja Kettunen (@sojafoxpoetry)
Oct 20, 2024
Oct 20, 2024 at 8:54 AM UTC
Splattered boots
stand ready, resting
from tied black laces
and muddy roads.
An attaché case
gapes too,
cwtches the photo
of a young woman
with dark wavy hair,
her unframed
forever- smile
focussed on a face
behind the camera
at the moment
the shutter clicked
and clicks and clicks
opening and closing,
packing and unloading,
staying and leaving,
making up a bed
from striped & labelled
winceyette.
Here's a tear
of tissue paper
stabbed urgently
on folded cloth
with random red stitches.
Here's the Star
of King David
pointing upwards,
locked on the blanket
by one steel safety pin.
Jun 27, 2016
Jun 27, 2016 at 11:36 AM UTC
Miss Ciano you didn't do so well
Perhaps you can help us with this cloud?
We have to tame it Miss Ciano,
Go to the mountain and immerse ourselves
Let the thunder out and let it pass
Death is all part of life Miss Ciano
The last bit
You know that
You can always sit and watch the sea
If we went to Conwy we would see the sea
In Conwy
I do enjoy your daily offerings
Oct 5, 2015
Oct 5, 2015 at 3:32 AM UTC
By Arcassin B & Sonja B.M
SBM
left the ring in procession,
silently walked the track.
dust rose, the distance grew.
out of sight ,
talked in code and rhythms.
the train passed,
gulls flew the heat haze.
on return, no one spoke.
AB
Flowing streams,
Except very hard and rugged,
I remember the days of ceiling leaks into buckets,
I see,
Crazy **** when I'm on my meds,
Why dont you believe me,
When I say I see the tracks with a dark red.
Mar 4, 2015
Mar 4, 2015 at 9:50 PM UTC
I would be this gentle mist that lingers
On autumn’s flowered field—
Yet I wish I could be a golden sunbeam,
Painting my lover's lashes in a gilded haze.
But that is not me. With gentle kisses,
I **** the summer’s flowers;
I am the coldness they fear.
I wrap the earth within my arms, but blind its sight—
My love summons winter’s night to arrive,
Stilling the pulse of all that once breathed life.
I swear my love brings death to every chamber,
But maybe that is the price we’re meant to pay.
For love and pain have always been entwined,
And when we bleed, as everyone must one day,
We will bleed as one.
-Sonja Kettunen (ig: @sojafoxpoetry)
Oct 16, 2024
Oct 16, 2024 at 8:28 AM UTC
Out by the bay
Sonja sleeps
She opens her eyes
Only to peek
At the passing cars
Or at the loud noise
Maybe it's her name
Maybe it's his voice
Then out of the blue
A man passes by
And then she pretends
To keep shut her eyes
But here I am
By the nearby palm tree, spying
I notice that Sonja is not sleeping
She's crying
Tears are of no notice to others but me
Poor sleeping Sonja
Under the tree
I can make up all sorts of stories
But I never will know
From where these tears came
To where will it go
So I sat beside Sonja
A drink in my hand
I said "Sonja, my dear
Do not cry. I know you are weary
That's why you sleep.
But know dearest that I have been watching you weep."
Sonja opened her eyes, all in a glaze
Then asked me a question
Looking away from my face
She spoke in the faintest of voices, she said, "Hal do you know who that man was, the man in the hat? If you do not know, then why do you care? You do not know me enough to despair."
"Sonja, how do I know that your name is yours? There is a meaning to actions however you don't see. Now tell me your story."
Then the man went and stood from the stool he had sat
And left with his panama hat
He did not even look our way
He said not a word, from the very start to the very end
It seemed he had made his way there
To see sleeping Sonja, that was all.
She told me of lost love
Of not wishing to sin
She told me he married
A woman he did love
But their love was new
His and Sonja's was old
Sonja had been sent to a convent
When they were in love
When she broke her vow
She thought so could he
Now he merely passes the bay
And Sonja waits patiently
I felt for her story
When would she end her waiting?
When she gets old and the sun wrinkles her skin?
Why does he keep her hoping?
Pain is a memory that we insist on remembering
Forgetting is a choice, not a flaw
How can we forgive
When we return to the past?
He must be returning the favor he thinks
And Sonja sleeps in atonement.
Nov 8, 2015
Nov 8, 2015 at 10:38 AM UTC
*"I once tried to fit my head and whole body in a Pringles can, just so
someday when I die, it would be easier for them to bury me."*
It was something Sonja would say.
Though I begin to forget who she is, how she likes to think, what she
likes to say and do. I am erasing her, though all we ever were is a
dancer's footprints on the beach.
We have never had a proper dance lesson. I wonder what kind of lie it
was when I thought of buying a pair of nice, soft pink ballet shoes. But
honesty runs in my blood and that's why each month I bleed for seven
days.
I am gluing the butterflies to the wall. They would glow in the dark and
do with us what the Blue Fairy do with Pinocchio.
None of us has ever lied until we found the ruby. I feel that her nose is
becoming longer, longer than ever.
It feels ethereal, like we are one but separated. Light as an angel's step. I
cannot stop thinking about the dance.
Going to the beach, while the road is still moonlit.
Tonight the sky is clear. I can hear the crickets chirp. I am forgetting
how her voice sounds, how her hair falls, how her eyes open and close. I
think it's because I might have defenestrated her.
That is how the curtain insists to stay in red.
"I want to marry my earphone."
I wonder if it is also something Sonja would say. I only remember her
as a yellow thing, small as sprout and dead as bark. She tried a lot to
kiss some metal and cold liquids, but her lips were too unreal and her
nails would not ever grow long.
I think she fell and broke a whole skull.
It is always our dream to be the sand.
Sep 9, 2014
Sep 9, 2014 at 1:45 PM UTC
You'll never know
How much I loved you,
How much I cared.
You'll never know
About my pain,
About my broken heart.
You'll never know
How much I cried,
Just lying on my bed
And thinking of you . . .
kissing her.
-Sonja
Feb 19, 2016
Feb 19, 2016 at 9:04 PM UTC
Talking about trash and vomitting i am staring at the ceiling with my dry mouth open
I slept at three and woke up at eleven
It was a sunny morning my roommate left at seven she left the curtain open and why did not she let the window break sometimes i think of jumping but standing on height makes me want to fall to bed and hide under the blanket
I don't want to bathe and eat breakfast but i kept snacking and i wish i were that sweet tooth i haven't washed the dishes and ****** and i am thinking of
Being in a plane
Heat struck and breaking the window the wind the clouds the pressure
I don't know if i am still afraid of heights
I have never been that high enough anyway like i am on the second floor it's never high enough i think of the high buildings in the capital city but i just love her too much
I will not
I will not
I will not let them read me in newspapers
I still think about methods to die but it does not make sense anymore like i want to have bullets on my head like jesus' crown but i don't want the cold thing in my mouth i don't want my head to be a blood fountain out of the blue
I am too drained even to think of running and jumping off a cliff like it's actually dumb and not pretty and i hear that we have so much to live
We have so much to live
I didn't have my breakfast
I am too okay to think this laziness as depression i cannot blame my brain it is too okay it is too okay i am too okay i shouldn't complain
Too much
Too much i complain too much
You grow flowers out of your corpse but all i want to be is to decay into plastic and harm the earth and it's true that such a sad world we live in
I am getting you back here
Sonja i am getting you back here
You are still me
You are still me
You are still me
Welcome home
Oct 18, 2014
Oct 18, 2014 at 3:27 AM UTC
morning silence
disappearing slowly
into staccato rain
Written by
Ute Sonja Medley
Oct 8, 2017
Oct 8, 2017 at 10:56 AM UTC
RE: . pdf .
sonja benskin mesher
06:07
Good Morning
I wake to find the internet is fixed,
so have read the document file.
as time is short, and the fact that
it all looks very well. I did like my odd spacing,
yet the dots are there.Let us go ahead and
both have a very nice day. I thank you
for all your work on this, and at
the weekend too.
i am very pleased, a little excited.
yes shall we refer to it as the journal.
sbm.
Nov 1, 2015
Nov 1, 2015 at 1:24 AM UTC
.
I love to walk naked thru city streets
&
I can honestly say
That
The greatest city in the
WHOLE WORLD
to
Walk around naked in
Is
Boston
( in the good ole USA ! )
,,,
Me
&
sonja benskin mesher
We go there together
All the time
Oct 21, 2015
Oct 21, 2015 at 12:13 PM UTC
people trapped somewhere
virtual reality
existence reduced
Written by
Ute Sonja Medley
Aug 6, 2017
Aug 6, 2017 at 10:41 AM UTC
bouffant clouds
sharing blue sky
twinkling windows
Written by
Ute Sonja Medley
Sep 25, 2017
Sep 25, 2017 at 6:28 AM UTC