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Theresa M Rose Oct 2015
The Midnight Dawn: The ship begins to dock.
A woman stands, looking down, silently. Black waters swirl salty white foam; Icy waters move through flapping rudders; The sounds of shifting motors pound; This is a beckoning scene for one in feelings of immersing self-isolation; And, Lora stands at this very edge. Lora stands completely unaware of the true beauty that surrounds her at this very moment.
         The ship’s docking, at Dearing's port, in the Kotzebue Sound... Alaska's pre-dawn dark blue skies with it’s tawny orangey gray clouds; A  panoramic view of white snowy peak mountains surrounds the port. And yet, the only thing Lora has on her mind … is a small Inuit village that will soon make her isolation complete.

    Out onto the deck Jeff calls, "Lora!"

Lora turns towards her husband's voice; But then, turns her eyes back to the whirling water over the stern.
  
    "Sweetheart?" Jeff places his hand on Lora’s arm, "I called the shore; The transport will be waiting… as soon as we're finished docking."
Jeff's voice becomes serene.
“ Wow. Lora, I can’t believe it. It’s been eight years since I been home last."
Jeff places his hand on Lora's.
“ It’ll be good for us to be with family. We'll leave the ship before the sunrise and we’ll arrive in the village just in time to see the final day of Tribal Awareness Week. Lora, I wish we were here a couple of weeks ago. I think my mother would have been happier meeting you when she wasn't so busy...."
  
Lora turns…, "You know, Jeff; I do wish you would just shut the hell up!”
Lora pulls her hand away.
“ Please, just keep still until we get up there.”
Her teeth clench.
“ It's another four and a half-hours, to get to  where we need to go. And, quite frankly, I think it's going to be hard enough for me to what needs to be done; And, I’d much rather get through this without having to listen to your mouth all the way up there."

"Alright.", Jeff says in a somber voice.  He turns to walk back inside but then he sees a new flicker of hope.
"Lora, I see the biplane. It's pulling in..; See it? See it, down there, at slip four, on the pier?!” Jeff smile’s pointing to the small transporter; As he does he grabs Lora kissing her cheek. “ I'm go get the porter to help me with our bags and we'll meet you down at the clearing, All right?”
"Fine.” Lora,…with a strain in her throat.
"Fine, let's just get this over with..."

    Lora stands at the clearing;… She watches the ships crew set-up for a day of helping  passengers board and depart the ship.  Jeff arranged for the two of them to leave the ship two hours earlier than everyone else so they could meet up with their connection.
As Jeff and the porter comes down the ramp a man comes down the dock waiving.
“ Jeff!”

    Jeff calls out. "Lora, here comes Gabe!"
“ Gabe! Gabe!”
"Gabe?"
"Honey!? This is my cousin, Gabriel." Jeff says to Lora as they started down the pier to the biplane. “ He runs our local transport."
    Gabe turns towards Lora.
" Yeah, I run everyone from our village up and down the river; Sometimes, I think this little craft here thinks she's just another boat! She so seldom has a chance to be airborne.”
The luggage is placed on board, Jeff and Lora settle into their seats and Gabe starts moving up the sound; Then, after about fifteen moments the little plane begins to lift, up and out, off the water.
  
    Lora becomes startled, "I thought the plane wasn't going to leave… I thought we were not going to be airborne?! I thought we were riding up the river?"
  
"Yes, Lora." Gabe states with a giggle,
"Yes, the Koyukuk River! I'm sorry, I thought Jeff would have told you?! We'll be airborne for just over an hour then we’ll reach the Koyukuk River and then, from that point, we’ll be riding the river for another three hours till we reach the village."

"Oh."
Lora sits back… and begins to stare out at the enormity of the Alaskan skyline. For her, it seems to have no end; And yet, for Lora there seems to be, nothing, nothing at all but endings on her horizon.

    The procession begins...
The parade comes down the main road in the small Inuit village. The local people are all playing drums, jingles and bones and they’re all wearing traditional ceremonial attire.

    Lora starts looking around to find her husband but Jeff is gone. Lora thinks, angrily.
‘ This is so senseless!? Why did Jeff ******* up here? I can't believe this; Here I am at The Koyukon Festival to tell his mother we're divorcing!? His mother never wanted me in his life. He was just suppose to finish his studies and come back home. I'm sure she'll be relieved to see me gone from his life.’

    Jeff comes up behind her, smiling.
"Honey, Honey isn't this wonderful?! I remember my parents and I participating all together in these events when I was small.”
Jeff points down the road. “ Hey Hon, look!" He places his arm on Lora's waistline.

    Lora turns to him with a grimace," Remove that…!"
    Jeff moved his hand and Lora turns to see where Jeff is pointing.
Lora sees, her mother-in-law, PaKaSuk; PaKa begins down the road dressed in her traditional Inuit tribal clothing.
    She has on a headdress made from the skin and skull of a coyote, and there’s a pair of small antlers imbedded on it. And, she has on tall boots made of polar-bear fur that are adorned at the rims with dangling teeth from the hunts of the past.
PaKa sings long mournful notes as she plays a soft singular beat over and over again on a drum-snare of  sealskin and whalebone.
    Jeff waves to his mother; As she sees her son, she begins to call out,


” Come fellow me one and all…;

Come fellow me to the place of the great hall;

Come to hear a tale that must be told;

Come hear the words from the time of old.”

As PaKa reaches the doorway she gestures to Jeff and Lora.
"Please come, sit here near the fireplace."
    As everyone-else  finds seat’s; PaKa kneels down, she looks deep into Lora‘s eyes; She smiles and then hands Lora a small long rectangular box.
Speaking softly, "Lora, please, hold this… But, do not open it right now; Wait until I’m done with my story. I'll return and we will talk."
  
    Lora stares at PaKa thinking…
‘She is an odd woman. To give me a gift? Looking down at the small rectangular box. She makes a huff, ‘ It's probably a brand new pen to sign the divorce papers with. She's probably…; But wait!’
Lora remembers, ‘ Jeff hasn't told her anything about the divorce yet. ‘
Lora places the box on her lap.

    The show begins...
    PaKa hushes the assembly; Cues the drums to play.
    The drums start. It is a slow, low singular beat  beating over and over…; Over and over. beating  slow low beats; Over and over... Again.

    Jeff bends down; He whispers, "Lora, the crowd is so much larger then I ever remembered it being before."
    Just then, a woman comes and sits right next to Lora and the woman has a baby sleeping in her arms.
Lora closes her eye and thinks,…
‘ Oh God… Why couldn’t this woman find somewhere else to sit; Anyplace other than here?’

    "Welcome! I am PaKaSuk...I am the Coyote-woman for my people…, now! But my story is of a Coyote-woman of long ago. Her name,… GaTraRa; The Coyote-woman Who Lost Her Tears.
Come one and all close your eyes. We shall breath deep the air and hear the drums beat…; And, we shall go… into the past.

            GaTraRa became a coyote woman when she was young. Much younger than the old custom....The old Coyote-woman would chose a young girl to replace her and she would teach the girl all of the knowledge  needed to help her people; She would learn all the wisdom of the herbs that cure and when ready she would take place. GaTraRa was chosen… And with great pride and joy of all the tribe.
She had learned much in a small time working at the side of the old Coyote-woman. But, a great sickness came to the people; Nearly half the tribe were lost...
The old coyote woman was lost…  GaTraRa was now The Coyote woman; …without knowing all the wisdom  the old coyote woman needed to give…

    Lora, sits there listening to her mother-in-law; She starts feeling cold beads of sweat against her skin. She starts feeling a slow low ache in the pit of her stomach.
    Jeff looks at Lora, "Are you alright?"
    "Leave me alone!” She swats at him. "Just go away! I'm fine. Leave me to hear this..."

    PaKaSuk continues "By our old traditions the Coyote-woman is not to join with any man; It was said… She’s to care for all the people of the tribe; But…, for GaTraRa;  GaTraRa was highly favored in the eyes of the council, And, especially by the chief elder's son, NeKraRa.
NeKraRa, who wanted the tribes very young new Coyote-woman to be his spoke a plea to the elders; GaTraRa wanted to be his as well. But she knew a Coyote-women was not allowed to join.  GaTraRa was surprised and overjoyed when the elders told her that she and NeKraRa being allowed to be joined...She felt the spirits were pleased.  And, soon after their joining they were blessed...They had conceived a child.
  
    The drums begin sounding faint and far away to Lora. The scent from  the smoke seems to be making her feel hazy.

Lora feels a low dark ache in the pit of her belly; It begins to grow; Her head lowers and her breath begins to labor. The pain is so deep Lora's eyes feel full of heat and she holds-back a feeling to cry out...
  
    PaKaSuk continues…, "It was the time of the hunt!”
  
    Eyes tighten. The pain becomes overwhelming to Lora; From a deep place within … A howling cry cries out!
"AAAAIIIIEEEEE"


    GaTraRa pushes; A baby’s cry fills the room. Her beaming sweaty body falls back onto the bedding.
    "It is a boy! You have a son!” mother-in-law smiles while wiping off the tiny crying new born.
"My child, he is a, strong, healthy boy! And, look, look see how his face shines like dawning light. NeKraRa will be pleased when he returns."

    As her husband's mother places the new born into her waiting arms, GaTraRa thinks ‘ No woman could ever be this happy.’
She looks up and says, "This day is the day of my greatest joy,"
  
Several weeks come and go. It will soon be  time for the men to return

Several weeks come and go without the young men.
The sound of drums call out from the distance; The time  for the return has come at last.
Many come to the Great Hall to greet the men when they arrive. The young Coyote-woman lefts her baby and runs happily to show her husband, NeKraRa, his fine new son.
Looking out, beyond the path, the men could be seen; They look weary of their hunt; Not all who left seems to be coming… The elder  hunters  may be a day or two behind bringing the treasures of their travels ;All the trades made with the outsiders.  The younger men come with the new pelts to cure and with the fresh meat and fish for the smoke.  As the men come closer the young women gain sight of their man; They run to walk with them to the Great Hall. But, but GaTraRa could not find her man. Her husband, NeKraRa, was nowhere among the men.
“ NeKraRa; NeKraRa !“ The young Coyote-woman begins thinking…’ He may be with the elder hunters; But why?’ She calls out several more times “ NeKraRa!”
Grabing at the men as they pass she asks,
"Where is my husband?"
    None of the men would speak to her or even look up at GaTraRa They’d just keep pass by her and enter the tribal council. Leaving her standing there holding her small baby.

    NeKraRa's father comes out of the council hall; He walks to GaTraRa and places his hand upon her arm.
"My child, our NeKraRa met his death over the ice on the very first night of the hunt."
  
    She looks down into the face of her small child.
"That was the night his son was born..."
Softly, sadly she speaks to her sleeping child cradling him in her arms,
"You will hold your father's name, my sweet boy...and his spirit.“
She walks home.

    Her mother-in-law meets her at the door, crying.
In a deep mournful tone, "My child!"
    GaTraRa just stands there with a void look on her face. Then, she looks at her baby. She lifts him up and hands him to her mother-in-law,
"Here mother," in an increasingly laboring tone,
"Here, here is our NeKraRa."

    The next day, mother-in-law waits for the baby to wake. She waits, long…, but there is no cry. She goes to lift him up and to wake him but as she pulls the blanket back she sees the baby's body is still, motionless. The baby is cold, blue and silent,
She lifts him and lets out a long wailing cry, "No...!"
  
GaTraRa runs…, only to see her baby in her mother-in-law's arms; A face full of tears and crying out over and over again, "He's gone...He is gone!"
GaTraRa falls to the floor; She begins to rock, repeating
"No…! No…! No…!"
But yet, now, not a single tear falls from her eyes.
  
Weeks pass since the death of her baby. Her duties as coyote woman become harder for her. Whenever others seek out her help she becomes angry. She says, "The spirits curse me; I went against them with family and now I have nothing; They will allow me no peace!"
All she does is watch the doorways; it is as she is waiting for someone or something...

    The council watches GaTraRa closely. Mother-in-law brings her worries to the elders.
“GaTraRa‘s sadness grows. “
Mother-in-law tells them, “She must be watched. Our Coyote-woman has felt the brush of the Raven’s feathers; Her tears are stuck within… No tears fall.”
Mother-in-law pleas to them, “ Her sorrow grows, silently! I fear, if we do nothing, she will be taken from us as well.”

    The women of the council gather together; They decide to have the grieving ritual for GaTraRa. But, none them has ever done this ritual. This was something the Coyote-woman would do.

    Days pass, the men are preparing to leave for the last hunt of the season. And, the women begin to prepare the council hall. They gather up all the things they could remember from having watched the ritual done times before.
    The chief elder sees the woman; And he asks, “What are you women doing?”
Mother-in-law tells him of what she and the other women have plan.
Shaking his head, “For as far as back as my memory takes me I have never seen a Grieving-Ritual done during this season before; And, without the young men being around. Do you really know what you are doing?”
All the women said, “ We must!”

    The men are gone…

    The women take GaTraRa to the council hall. They place her near the fire. GaTraRa watches as women gather herbs and place them in bowls.
She speaks out, “You don’t know what you are doing!?” Then, her voice saddens.
” …or maybe you do.”

    The women do not listen; Without a word, they begin to place the bowls in all the places they have remembered seeing them before…Recalling, all the men would play drums all night, during the vigil, they each pick up a drum. They gather around the fire. They stand and surround  the fire with their drums; The woman slowly begin to play.
GaTraRa, motionless, looks to the women thinks to herself, ‘Why are they doing this…I did this…to myself. They should not care
As always, I enjoy any and all  feedback you could give me.
AKIKO Jul 2017
Paka-isipin ang bawat salitang sasambitin
Bigyan ng pansin ang aking damdamin
Hindi mo man pansin sa isang minuto lang masaya kong araw ay natakluban na ng lumbay
Dahil sa prangka **** bibig
Na makabasag araw!

Sa buka ng bibig
Tagos sa puso't isip
Sabay sayong halakhak ang aking pagtangis
Sana'y pinag-isipan ang bawat letrang binitawan
At sana'y batid mo na ako'y nasaktan
At makulay kong araw ay
lumisan na ng tuluyan

Magandang samahan ay
Inagus na ng luha
Patungo sa pusong may patlang sa gitna
Sanhi ng iyong salita
Na tumusok sa gitna
Ng aking pusong noo'y banal
At buo pa ng pagmamahal ng isang tunay na pamilya

Ngayo'y ikaw pa ang galit
at ako pa ang sinisi
Winika mo pa na akoy sensitibo't
Madaling masaktan
Gayong ikaw ang may kasalanan
At maysanhi ng aking kalungkutan.
Samahan ng isip ang bawat salitang nais sabihin.dahil hindi lahat ng tao'y katulad **** may matigas na puso at paninindigan.
ZT Feb 2016
Ako nga gapabilin ra unta
Sa kweba nga way himaya
Kay ako man diri komportable
Pero ako gipugos gyud nimo pre

Ang akong kweba imong gi kulkog
Mintras  Nagngisi paka nga mura ug hubog

Hangtod sa migawas na
Ang lawas kong imong gibira
Padung sa kalibutang mahayag
Kahayag nga makadam.ag

Ako nga nalipay
Kay karon kabalo na ako
nga ang kalibutan kay hayag man diay
ang kalibutan dako man diay
Ang kalibutan kay gwapo man diay

Pero wa ako gadahum nga sa ulahi ako diay kay magmahay
Kay ako, gidulaan ra diay sa inatay

Pagkahuman nimo bolabolahon
Sa imong kamot paligidligiron
Sa imong tudlo kalit nga palagputon

Isagpak sa pader
Ihandos sa ilalom sa lamisa
Ipahid sa maong **** kupas na
Pero ako nagpakatanga
Balikan mo, ako gahulat pa
Pero diay, ako gidulaan mo ra.
Thoughts of a Kugmo
Jigz Oct 2017
Ginailad lang ba nako akong sarili nga ok lang ko
Sa pag trato nimu sa akua nga murag trapo
nga labhan lang nimu ug gusto nimung gamiton

Ambi ba nako ug direct to the point ka
kay hastang baliktara imung trato sa akua pag ako nag talikod na
gi himu tikag princessa pag kauban tika
gi antos ko ang tanan, sa ka way klaro nimu ka storya
ingun-ingun paka ka naay pag-asa
pero ang kamatuoran ngitngitpas alkitran

Nag antos kog pito ka bulan gi hatag nako ang tanan
ang resulta karun mura-patag mas worst pa sa wa nagkaila
nikalit kag wa na nag reply pag tan-aw nako sa twitter nimu
naa nakay lain kasabay sa lipay-lipay
Anton Feb 2020
kay naipamulong mo naman,
nga ang atong gugma hantud dinhi nalang gyud taman,
ug diri na gyud siguro mahuman,
pastilan pag-kailara nako sa imong "gugmang walay katapusan",

Usahay magkatawa ko nga ako ra usa,
Maghinumdom samga saad mo nga ikaw ug ako ra,
hangtud sa katapusan ug wala na gyud lain pa,
apan karun asa naman tika pangitaa?

nganung ania napod ko karun nag inusara,
sa matag gabii magahilak,
nga daw bata nga bag.ong anak,
pero wala kay madungog nga kasaba,
tungod kay ng kining kasing kasing ang gahilak,

dapat nalang gyud nakong dawaton ang kamatooran,
nga dili gyud kita ang ginapili nga magdayon ug mag uban,
hangtud sa katapusan,
sakit nga pamation ug pamaladungon,
nga ato lang gisayangan ang mga hinaguan



dili ba nga ikaw bisan unsay mahitabo
dili man gyud unta kita dapat nga magkalagyo
nisaad paka nga muabot gyud lagi kita ug anibersaryo?
dili ba nga ikaw sa ginoo akoa man nga gipangayo
pero karun nganung ang pagbiya na kanako mao naman ang imohang hangyo,
nagtuo pa ako nga ang gugma nimo kanako bulontaryo ug dili lang diliryo,


mga gibati ko karun ga sagul sagol, adunay kalipay ,
kasakit ug naapoy kaguol,,
pero bisan kausa wala ako gabagulbol ug gabasol,
siguro sakto na ang gamay nga higayon na ikaw sa kinabuhi ko nagpaduol,

buhian ko naba ang tanan natong gihuptan?  
kalimtan naba tika ug dili na gyud  hisgutan?  
dawaton nalang ba nako nga kanimo dili gyud ko angayan?
imo naba akong biyaan tungod lang kay naa ako'y apan?
o naana bakay lain napili ug imoha nako nga ilisdan?

magkita nalang siguro ug balik didto na sa ikaduhang kalibutan,
isaad ko nga dili ug dili tika hikalimtan
didto sa ikaduhang kalibutan ikaw akoa nga atangan.
kay didto ang gugma nato wala nay katapusan
solEmn oaSis Dec 2015
sa konting diperensya
unahin ang pasensya
na merong hustisya
bago ang sintensya

ituring ang mga babae na parang KRISTAL
kasintahan man o hindi,makasama o hindi sa PEDESTAL
paka-ingatan damdamin nila na HUWAG MAG-KRAK
natutunan kong karanasan *
IWASANG MANG-WASAK!
The end justifies the means.
I KNOW LIFE IS UNFAIR, BUT THIS IS ******* RIDICULOUS.
Eugene Aug 2017
Hilig at Hiling

Sinong mag-aakalang pareho tayo ng nakahiligan?
Sa pagbabasa sa larangan ng katatakutan?
At hindi ko inakalang ang aking gawa ay iyong magugustuhan,
Hanggang iba't ibang kababalaghan na ang aking nasubukan.

Mahigit isang taon na ba mula nang tayo ay magkakilala?
Mahigit isang taon na ba mula nang hilig natin ay sadyang kakaiba?
Mahigit isang taon na bang ikaw ay isa kong tagahanga?
Mahigit isang taon na ba mula nang gawin kitang bida sa aking istorya?

Sa mga antolohiyang aking ginawa,
Sa iyo ko inihabilin ang mga aklat  na iyong nabasa.
Paka-ingatan mo dahil iyon lamang ang aking pamana,
Makalimot man ako, sana ang mga gawa ko ay iyong ipaalala.

Kung sakaling darating na ang wakas ng ating pagkikita,
Ako ay nalulugod pagkat ikaw ay aking nakilala.
Hiling ko sana na huwag **** kalimutan ang aking paalala,
Na kapag ako ay nawalan ng memorya, alam mo na ang bagay na sa akin ay magpapa-alala.
Dark Nov 2018
Ano mo ba talaga ako?
Sino nga ba ako para sayo?
Ano bang relasyon meron tayo?
Meron bang ikaw at ako?

Hindi ko alam kung paasa ka ba,
O sadyang umaasa ako sa wala,
Minsan ika'y malambing,
At minsan rin ako'y estranghero sa iyong paningin.

Pagod na ako kakasuyo sayo pag ika'y nagtatampo,
Pagod na rin ako kakaisip kung meron bang tayo,
Sawang sawa na ako masaktan,
Sobra na ang mga sakit na ibibigay mo sa akin.

Tanda mo pa ba ang araw na umamin ako sayo,
Umamin ako ako na mahal kita at ang sagot mo,
Pasensya na hanggang kaibigan lang ang maiibibgay ko,
Na paka tanga ko para maniwala sa isang katulad mo.

Sabagay, bakit ko nga ba linagyan ng halaga ang mga salita mo?
Tapos sa huli ako ang matatalo,
Kasi may mahal ka ng iba,
At ako nasa isang tabi na walang kwenta.

Akala ko parehas tayo ng nararamdaman,
Mga akala na nagawa akong saktan,
Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko,
Lalo na pag kasama mo siya at hindi ako.

Hindi ka ba masaya sa piling ko,
Para siya ang piliin mo at hindi ako,
May kulang pa ba sakin?
Para siya ang papasukin sa puso mo,
At hindi ako.
Gothboy Feb 2020
Hinayaan ang sariling anurin nang oras
Hinayaan ang puso mag hilom ang butas
Hinahayaan ko nalang sarili ko
wala din naman may pake
Paka hulog nalang sa bangin
paka lunod sa dagat
masakit iwan lamat
parang nag luhod sa asin

Gustong harapin ang problema
pero baka di pwedi
Ang problema kasi ang sarili

Lulutasin sana
Tatapusin sa isang bala

Inom nang lason sana isahaan akoy bulagta
ikakamatay palang lason yung lason na salita

Salitang binitawan
mga tao sa paligid
Di ko maiwasan
mga taong mapili

Mga perpekto
Gustong itama matagal nang tama
kunting mali mo lang
masakit na salita sayo tatama

Kaya mas mabuti pang patayin mabilisan saksak O baril sa mukha
kesa patayin dahan dahan sa masamang salita.
ako rani Jul 2019
Walay tambal sa kamingaw,
Mao na ang akong nabal-an,
Sa mga panahon nga wala paka mi-abot,
Sa Panahon nga wala pako nahigugma

Murag kilat ang naa sa akong dughan
Kay ngano? Kusog kaayo ang dagugdug
Kung ikaw ang akong makit-an
Muiruri gathairu Mar 2023
Lazima uchoose, dooh ama doze
Lazima uchoose, respect alarm ama uisnooze
Lazima uchoose, ujitume ama ulose
Lazima uchoose, ujibuild au *****

Izi ndo vitu hamtaki kuambiwa, izi ndo the truth
Mnataka niseme life ni smooth but Leo siwasooth
Sherehe Sheria ndio inamaliza mayouth
Ukilewa vuguru, Hadi hunaga matooth


Daily unadial pedi ukidai Mali
Jipende buda na for sure utafika mbali
Imagine ukiwa diani ukiorder wali
Si lazima buy iyo jumu expe ati ju ni Kali

Picha ya Kenyatta Kwa walanje ndo unafaa kusaka
Jipe goals Ka Sancho, salah au saka
Mulla mob, nine lives Ka paka
Usijitreat Ka trash we si takataka

But anyway maisha ni yako
Chaguo ni lako
Ntaachia apo ju naskia mtu Kwa mlango
Am sure ni peng Fulani utoka pango

— The End —