In silence
He destroyed

❤
Her

damaged
a word never described it so perfectly
it functions good enough
but wear and tear over time
has taken away the shine
damaged
like scrap parts sold for cars
once it was beautiful and whole
but it sits on its own
and even if it does find another home
or something to complete
it will still stand out
like mismatched socks
damaged
when they look at him they see character
every dent tells a story
of tough times and how they only made him stronger
but in her they see something wrong
a machine broken beyond repair
if she could she would smash her entire being and watch the pieces shatter
because at least something obliviated
doesn’t have a false sense of hope
blindly dragging it along
wondering if one day things can be repaired and the damage be undone
damaged
we don’t know when along the way it happened but it did
and it has altered everything about her
from the way she smiles to the way she sees the world
i wish i could show her how to re-wire her brain so her thoughts can be reset
and the pieces can rearrange until they feel like they are where they’re supposed to be
but she is damaged
i am damaged
a word has never described me so perfectly
damaged

This upcoming February darkness,
I fear is going to take its final toll.
Not equipped to comprehend fate's
sick intellectual twisted game.

Memories from our past life,
rushed through my veins.
For it has only been one earth year,
but this time warp we got ****** into,
seems like a lifetime ago when I first inhaled your radiant chemicals.
You threw them into my path of airwaves.
Lost,
knowingly  aware there is no going back to what was or what could be.
What source of love is this?  
Much more than just  
the chemical  dopamine.
No.
More complex.

Yet my foe reality,
is always waiting around the corner.
Can't seem to get it on my side.
But determined 
to stop and wake  my pathetic urge  of hope I
shamefully still hold  on to.
Blood stains my scenery and memory pod.  
No these are no trophy's.
Your curse is my beautiful divine punishment.
  

Reminded
of the genuine ways  
of what humans use to call a real "man".
That i never  shown effortlessly
due to my selfish actions.
How insecurity brought out
the wrong demon inside me.
And vacuumed, and blacked out  the fire
we both in lighted together , nothing but catastrophic intentions.
Our souls entwined as one.
Our  hell we planned to decimate as one.
Side by side.
Our own oblivion.

The beginning of our lovely  journey seemed too flawless.
Your false pretentious of how I was everything
  that you thought I'd be or not, left you blind to my tool of manipulation. .
Oh *** I knew the potential of your sorcery.
An amazing charm.
from the Genesis.
Still I did not object.


Your eyes glazed and burned like 100 suns into mine.  
Brighter than the suns destroyed
and countless planets obliviated.
For my own beautiful art
of genocide done by my own hand.
  Inspire of how we came into each others existence,
you  seemed  to  still acknowledge the common moral
Ways of the human race.

You came With fair  warning of the curse you were capable of casting,
one that had no ending.
An amazing disease. A plague of never forgetting your beauty.
A face of all goddesses.
Perfection.
A Masterpiece.

Fully aware of the costs of this suicidal journey.
blessed to even fill  your breeze
on my face from your
predisposed aroma feeling my cold lungs.
Shutting them down slowly.  
savoring the thirst of this process.
Ironically feeling more alive with your fire still burning inside me.  

Ablator synced to support my youth lungs that are now blackened by your hex.
Vitals balanced.
But for how long?

My sweetheart can I get your forgiveness?.
Selfish acts   corrupted   what was  once my soul,
And put yours  at stake.
Betrayal   got the best of you.

Years of  agony and torture I suffered without your embrace.
Our binding contract of loyalty I broke .
Smile of grace from ear to ear,
racing thoughts of  how I dreamed of
dying and to see those eyes one final time.
Look of Satisfaction fills your resplendent green eyes.

Patience ;
you have mastered build for this particular day.
my sins,
my evil deeds have  caught up so you could finally witness this  
moment.

Vitals slipping.
As my ablator slowly loses its power source.
Drifting away,
yet lifted in levels above to be
holding your hand a final time.
While I take my last breath.


Rest easy
with a peace of mind when you hear my flatline.
Baby thank you for this disease.
The cleansing I always thrived for.

My love forgive me.

Slipping higher.

Gone from existence.

From your shattered soul.

And she's still standing there,
On the shore of her memories.
With her lost dreams and forgotten laughs,
With her vanished hope and obliviated time.
With her stolen reminisces and extinct days.
In the blink of an eye, the time flew by,
In the flash of an eye, the seventeen year old grew up, why...
And she's still standing there,
Slowly sinking down the earth.
Wondering when did she lose it all.
When did she lose her smile,
When did she lose her mother's hug.
When did she lose her golden days,
When did she lose her life.
When did she turn thirty.
In the blink of an eye, the time flew by,
In the flash of an eye, the seventeen year old grew up, why...