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Ugo Apr 2012
Dedicated to stillborn fetuses, 99 cent Malt Liquor and Existentialism
1.
Nymphomaniac tree huggers
And overweight bisexual vegetarians
Swallowing phentermine poison to stay fit.

2.
Funky fresh *******  
throwing pigs at St. Augustine’s pear tree
and frolicking abortions over Moloch’s philoprogenitiveness,

3.
While sipping barbecue sauce dipped in Lipton tea,
dancing around adhesive bonfires
reciting memories of holocaust, the Kristallnacht nights
and beautiful words suffered by ancestors lost.

4.
Inhale chicken noodle soup, with a side of Lithium,
And prance to Literacy class to combat envisionment
With free association conceptual constructions,

5.
Computerized like Prometheus’ fire burning through SmartBoards
In classrooms where the poison of heterosexual history
Is fed to boys in skirts cursed by Adam’s apple,

6.
Baptized by social norms and locked away in hopeless closets
According to the Tautology of Leviticus…
until they cut their breath by the vein of soteriology;

7.
Misunderstanding of God’s words
Covets the innocent to early graves
In biblical paratactic irony…like God betting Satan for a Job.

8.
Rub fried chicken oil on Bartholomaeus Anglicus’ skin
and soil his white pride with ***** flavor,
for revenge  On the Properties of Things

9.
and howl out in glory of victory
over totes of  lickerish piper methysticum blunts
that beg the conundrum,
'What is the origin of this world?'
'Ether,' he replied.
But it is not ether!
Nor Datta. Dayadhvam. Damyata.
It is Dada. Dada. Dada!
  10.
For this is a record of the life stories of the greatest minds and geniuses of your generation,
written in boys and girls
who mimicked Basquiat’s genius and tagged bathroom walls with abstract philosophies like “Love is a prime number” and “ the weight of Duncan McDougall’s soul can only be found on the 15th of October”
who drank vampirish gulps of Vicodin while consoling themselves with aphorisms such as: “don’t rue the misses, you don’t need a Mrs. when you’re elevated by chemical kisses”
11.
Who stood naked in mirrors, weeping, for they were a mystery to themselves, but a great talent and soon to be legend to some.
Who lit cannabis in loneliness and waltzed naked with their ghosts, fantasizing about ****** tomatoes and Corpus Christi Mexican Jazz.
Who composed psychedelic anthems from dreams that were lost in ghettoes where virginities were lost for loaves of bread, for the hunger of bread.
12.
Who wrote suicide notes on a toilet seat, contemplating the texture of Marshall Mathers’ favorite underwear and whether the color green was an invention of **** Germany.
Who used to love their lovers in darkness and colored the streets of Manhattan with rainbows on June 24, 2011 to mark the date lady liberty finally bought a new pair of glasses.
13.
Who lost musical talents to a Wine-house and ended up in a whine-house where lobotomy was subsequently prescribed by the milligram.
Who indulged in pharmaceutical vices and when asked why replied simply, every recursively enumerable set is Diophantine.
Who diagnosed themselves with “start ****-itis” and self medicated by eating Fifinellas at the stroke of each midnight.
Who rubbed paraprosdokians on their skin and occupied Wall Street in search of a new euphemism for being American.
Who poured Alkalizer on a dead moose and kicked it while feasting on the divine question, “why does Rice play Texas?”
14.
who got bored with conventional relationships and bought the Origin of the World on street corners from vixens nicknamed “Jezebel” and climaxed atop of them screaming  “I’m in Babylon, the great Mother of ******!”
Who attempted suicides upon suicides upon suicides, in Oakland, until they were shipped away to private catholic universities in Rhode Island, where the history of Colossus was being taught.
15.
who serenaded love interests with four letter curse words at open bars where Kubla Khan was read and Tartars kings were licked all over like holy communion *****.
Who drove home with the spirits of wine and crashed on telephone poles where their obituaries were written in their prime, leaving their mothers weeping and calling congress to reconsider Prohibition.
16.
Who mixed Redbull with Propofol and drank the juxtaposition galore only to be woken up the next morning dead in their sleep.
Who tattooed rat poison packages with goodwill messages such as “****** divided by Water =6th day of creation” or “Seroquel + Brett Favre = St. Patrick”,
who went speedballing with Basquiat during autoscopy and woke up wondering the cost of Nautilus in Albuquerque.
17.
who took 33 hallelujah 1800 tequila jello shots and daydreamed about laying on Mithras’ grave, yelling, beetlejuice, beetlejuice…beetlejuice.
who found the truths of the Bible invalid by the miscalculation of Pi in 1 Kings 7, verse 3, and mailed death on anthrax letters to Reagan in protest.
18.
who sat empty bellied at breakfast tables wondering the temperature of satellites at Lagrangian points,  only to soon catch fire in their tongues and speak Labyrinth soliloquies that ended in
19.
Zion,
Where Google knows every answer.
In Zion
Where the youth, tomorrow’s future, quote a ***** named Hova better than they can quote Jehovah.
In Zion
Where *******’s art was used as weapon during the Cold war.
20.
In Zion
Where sartorial geniuses where no pants,
In Zion
Where David Kato Kisule is the secret hero of these words, for he was taken at a time
In Zion
Where we were supposed to be our ancestor’s sci-fi.

21.
In Zion,
Where the youth bear the scarlet letter X for they are a problem to tradition and hold no definition for the future, for they have discovered
In Zion
That the origin of this world is in their living eyes, and not in the dictionary of their ancestors who lived
In Zion
when the epitome of the literature of life ended in Revelation of Amen and Shantih shantih shantih;
this is a record of the greatest minds and geniuses there ever was, written
in Zion
where the meaninglessness and nothingness of Dada reigns, and the trinity of life now lives in the Subject, subjective and subjectivity.
http://www.amazon.com/OLAF-Nothing-Above-Fiction-ebook/dp/B009XZ9OVY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid;=1353822133&sr;=8-1&keywords;=olaf+last+king+of+nothing
I S A A C Aug 2021
bittersweet, Beetlejuice
silly me to wait for you
while you take flights around with your new boo
bittersweet, I wish I knew
how stupid I looked texting you
trying to get you to open up the whole time you was deeply in love
bittersweet, how you would
tell me your love life is nonexistent now I see you kissing up
with your new boo underneath the sun
like **** here we go again
falling in love with another dead end
cant pretend it doesn’t hurt, can’t pretend I didn’t try to make it work
it's just bittersweet, Beetlejuice
how silly of me to fall for you
the constant pattern I just keep going through
over loving dove, but cupid still shooting a doe
on my knees already but just cut my throat
transform the new into what is known
uncondition and recondition me as a home
then it's no longer bittersweet, Beetlejuice
bittersweet on to something new
J M Surgent Aug 2014
When the sun hid behind
a cover of trees
You shone with the intensity
of the full moon.
Stars in your eyes
like twilight skies,
Beetlejuice, Orion's belt;
the big and little spoons.
Lyra Brown Mar 2013
i was wearing a black and white
striped dress
one said i looked like beetlejuice
some said I looked like a mime
some said I reminded them of a prisoner
others said I looked like a barcode

i was all of those things
and none of those things
all
at
once
Dolly Partings Oct 2013
I was born into chaos, lived through chaos, and later on, sometimes openly welcomed chaos into my life.
Call me the anti-freud, but I don't blame my parents.
They left me locked by key in my own bedroom long enough to know my decisions from then on, and the implications would all be my own.
I was the pioneer for my own future, a regular Matilda.
I learnt to pick locks at eight years old. I got myself in and out of bad situations. Even if it meant hiding for a prolonged period of time afterwards.
Hiding isn't always the cowards way, waiting out situations with a large bag of dolly mixtures and Pokémon cards in the woods has gotten me out of a lot of ****. Hiding long enough to be reported missing to the police, and having people realise they'd rather have me alive and hyper as ******* e-numbers, than hate me for hiding from negative consequences for too long.
I've always been a **** bag. An absolute **** bag.
I ran away from home more times than i'd had hot dinners accompanied by prayers there.
I made no attachments, I had this inner indecisiveness, the ability to choose what was worst for me, on a complete whim.
It's scary, being so impulsive at a young age. One minute i'd be sat on the school bus on the top deck, minding my own business, and the next, I would look down and my ******* would be stuck up at the school teacher making sure we didn't break our own ribs trying to get on it.
Then i'd give a false name.
I had a foul mind. So much that I used to have to write down curse words, and throw the incriminating pieces of paper behind my wardrobe. My mum eventually found them, she knew just how much 'passionate' a child she'd bore after that.
I got used to the taste of soap thereafter, let's put it that way.
I'd always hated the idea of marriage before my parents even divorced, I dismantled my mother's eternity ring some years before, pushing the remaining contents down the sink. Little did they know their marriage would follow it shortly after.
There's things that happened in that house I will never speak of. Like saying the name Voldemort, or Beetlejuice. Far worse childhood nightmares would come from that, realisation.
I used to have this overwhelming urge to see other people's genitals, like it was the window to their soul or something. Looking into their eyes told me nothing, but once i'd gotten into their pants, that was a different story. The unveiling could happen anywhere. Even in aircraft toilets on the way to Disney Land, Florida. I was pushy.
Being a highly sexed child that never spoke, felt completely abnormal. Especially when the only thing I truly found attractive were eyelashes. Which ruled out any gender differences completely. As long as they had good eyelashes, I would follow them anywhere.
Barbie please forgive me for the things I made you do to Ken. I was too young to know.
Being born into this world with nothing but these two people and a couple of generations before them, their job is to guide you. They might not have even wanted you, or later regretted it. But by blood, they're stuck with you for the rest of your life.
They can't send you back to the store for being a defect model, or a little *******. Or else they lose much of their own life to a cell. There's no changing your mind when it comes to family.
But you can choose the five people you meet in heaven.
Mateuš Conrad Oct 2018
a 2nd reiteration
listening to
dropkick murphys'
song
i'm shipping off to
Boston
...

you ******* quasi-paddies
and Iraqi Aladdins
have ****** up "my"...
******* jukebox!

no music video ever came
with a ******* news channel
recommendation!

wankers!
   sprat boilers!
  brat spanking fetishists!

give me my ******* jukebox
back... you *******:
toddler's little pinky
wankers off!

it's not enough that
the blood starts to boil...
my thinking becomes
all scrambled!

i turn into a Danzig hunger-strike
when i don't get
to listen to new music!

wankie ***** wankie *****...
sure...
but when i ******* while
taking a **** and taking a ****...
i don't make a *******
video out of it, do i?!

juggernaut... juggernaut...
juggernaut...
  say it thrice like Beetlejuice...
and... well... shazam!
a rhino appears!

i'm taking prisoners...
the ones attached to the charge,
as they scream...
pretending to... "tag along".

give my jukebox back you
******* invertebrates!
Val Ajdari May 2016
I drafted a list of films.
That’s all.

‘The Age of Innocence’ was nothing
more than a journey on a ‘House Boat’
for a few ‘Pirates Of The Caribbean’
embarking ‘East of Eden’ in search of
‘The Secret in Their Eyes.’
But all they encountered on this
‘Road to Perdition’ was ‘The Birdcage’
specially made for the ‘Lord of The Rings’
and anyone else willing to decipher
the written code inside it.
‘Nine Months’ passed and the captain found
that ‘The Notebook’ of old ‘Umberto D,'
as it turns out, was a text written
in Italian, not in broken English.
The captain was ‘Lost in Translation’
when he assumed it was written by
‘The Great Dictator’ who was behind
the wheel of the ‘Titanic’
the night it sank.
While this was ‘As Good As it Gets,’
‘The Talented Mr. Ripley’
was suddenly ‘In The Mood For Love’
when another pirate translated the letters
of Umberto. The captain remembered himself
in a ‘Wonderful Life’ as a ‘Cast Away’
entangled in the loopy, mystifying grips
of ‘An Affair to Remember.’ It reminded
him of his youthful tryst with
‘The Princess Bride’ whom he lost to his
greatest nemesis, ‘Forrest Gump.’
‘The Odd Couple’ ‘Departed’ as the captain,
out of envy, took the lives of Gump, his woman,
as well as ‘The Lives of Others.’ Now, all the
captain was left with was the haunting
memory of a true beauty’s
‘Persuasion’ of an empty man
whose love was trapped like ‘Beetlejuice’
in the ‘Brokeback Mountain’ of his
own wicked heart. The captain failed to
realize that Umberto had addressed the
letter to his lost dog, Flike.

‘Analyze This.’ ‘Analyze That.’
Almost getting caught.
A pipe under the seat,
ceci n'est pas une pipe-
c'est mon Christ.
But blindness is permanent,
and no one
will stop the flogging
for me either.

But I escaped.
To turn upon my visage,
so splintered,
despite the still silver,
glaring back.

I see the droning lines,
countless faces,
cloned from my lips,
pressing farther back,
before Adam.

Each one bends giraffe-like,
awkwardly clasping the lines-
Lines of sunset and beetlejuice-
prelude to drawn scars,
who will sit beneath the surface,
aching for stars and biting the roots
of forgotten trees.

Rotten cell phones,
wild horses in captivity,
wheat-free Italian:
the cobblestones walked
by my souls.

The path ends nowhere,
the destination crumbled
under closed eyes-
so the end is nigh,
but effectively unseen.

I am Solomon forgotten:
sinner, soothsayer, and poet.
Only Weeds will grace my grave.
Little Wren Dec 2016
Moon,
drench me in December.
       Feed me the briar,
Trail the icicles of gravity
       down my spine.
Ground me in this
       hardened
      dormant soil.
Give me witch hazel flowers
      sprouting from my hair.
Adorn me with Yule's gown
      of brown
      and gray.
Speckle my eyes with
      Mercury's shadow,
Give me Owl's voice,
      Crow's rigid
                   wing.
Bejewel my crown of dried
      Oak leaves
With Taurus' red eye
          Aldebaran,
Beetlejuice, and Andromeda's
                   armspan.
Embellish me with a solemnity
         of solitude
So that my soul can sing
in these hours
        of renewal.
Mosaic Oct 2015
The pumpkin smiled
Without me have putting the knife to its skin
I worried about ol' Jacky boy

Living one a night a year
Clear cold nights with bones like new, guts of orange
sticky candy hands

i kiss him
a ghost
Dating the afterlife is tricky
like magician
And I am Rabbit

Death tastes like the ashes of your grandmother being smoked and Reese's with peanut allergy

His costume is always better than mine
But I am imitation
Thankful for my expiration date

Corpse bride Beetlejuice witch hung suicide noose
loaded gun stairwell fall accidental terrorist bomb in the mail
One way or the other
We live to a great and grand farewell

Pumpkin head is the Orange is the new Black
Black cat crossing bad luck love blues
Hint: Your obituary is old news
Julian Nov 2020
Stilted lingerie that fashions a kneaded traipse between trap-door destiny of double-take simultagnosia is a harder fright to outfox that even the most ghoulish amicable maskirovka of a throttled sapience beleaguered by the tropes of a tattermedalion class of Scarface vigor in the face of benighted tomes of a cruised palindrome of efficacy bromides flickering on the outskirts of esoteric thrones of catapults droning on about the listless squalor of philandering phronesis of ecdysiast *** in the cyprian hedges of limited wealth bemoaning the poverty of deprivation because of whiskers through feline sight languid in the remedial dances of captaincy snuck between the edges of destiny cordial only to Home Alone. We must sneak through the verdant pacification of an accordion grimace flanged by the eked snide spite of termagants of termination ruined by the future flickering into past distance because of spartan brutish mannequins of pasteurization glimpsing the thanatousia of death vindicated by vengeance brazen with a Colorado snare of a pinned etiolation of marauders of corsairs that only brave the delusion when the eternity is a trick-or-treat truth and dare consummated on the flimsy agape lychgates of constraints in flair that damage the ragged hypostasized engine of a blinkered hubris belonging to an anointed rigmarole fashioned into the pottery of fungible metamorphosis rather than frangible pulverization that scrapes through liturgy with abnegation rather than relishing plumage beyond the apes of apish planetary scares.


Trimming the blockbuster wearisome hardihood of plumes of fumigated regal ******* in the softened epigone of whiter masks of screaming scares
The times aplenty of swansong ignorance are a plaid disaster of Twister renegades that spar against the visagist carapace of hearkened live aware of ghosts that fuel the hypocrisy of belligerent mares
Forever stranded through the finifugal heaves of a 32 leaves magician of rollicking base jumps with acidic tatters in King of the World stunts the hirsute body politic is a pump and dump trumpery of livid thrills on the substitution of funk for skunk rather than grooves for humps
Nevertheless the scrappy schlep of a foggy dreary destiny is ablaze with Sergeants blistering through Forest Gump bumps as the alighted 80s returns with a vengeance in empires of victory rather than slippages of slump
Renewed by the litigable menace of oilers ****** with crudity and swimming in the askew verdure of the lewd and **** we bolt through the coltish demiurge of fastened fascination flaming with firebrands of deliberation scampering away in blemishes of profanity too rude
We scrape the legacy of elegant injustice and injury because the flamestun hypocrisy of leprosy caused by time is a rustic blue suede shoe that flummoxes in hibernation because of staggered queues ravishing too much of a screwball to be nailed because black artifacts are always unscrewed
Thanks to teamwork the cosmogony of regalia knows the Montana providence of a lissome liposuction radical in renewal because of the Morrison Hotel rather vacant but always populated with a carpal tunnel of slick oleaginous dramatics for histrionic history likable because the news is a purple hue relishing the paradise of cineaste rundles of candlelit mood
Imagine searing the sunlit halidom of the peak-time grooves of unbuttoned blarney frank and swiveled on sclerotic pretense slippery in fashion only to be ironclad in personas of the whispered woo in termagant liturgy that is a colporteur of genius hinged upon collective suitcases of IOUs blameless because the criminal is always hatched upon a 108 pentagon of newsy gripping footage of managerial flames of a barnstorm beyond booths but never above the scarecrow minister of the voguish tempers of trudgery spawned into the folkspun homely ties and wrinkles of wizened love too Titanic to be used
Parker hobohemia scowls at the punitive warbles of marsupial kingpin southern flashes of hyperborean ramshackle ruins of pooches scampered around like littoral fragments of a cinematic crudity in defeated torpindage blistering with foresight in vengeance because the clockwork hour is amazed but horrified by belligerence in overdosed ledgers of legends amused
Time hearkens that craven radication of rhizogenic demiurge blinking above the sleeping awake ringleaders of sedition enthused because of malapert princes crackling with homage to honed sharpened edges of a double-edged whisper reversal into the antithesis of the heaving red serrated by the vindication of impertinent criminals flustered by the pinpointed genius of the Primarily Blues.
Time sees past the sedative fliction of fictitious mangers on primipara  tunes that the euphoria of the now is the cement of every LP belonging above the charlatans of chavish sutured into a surgical effigy of the whitewashed preeminence of discernment into the discs that surpass the ashen cordiality of permissive and permissible leaky faucets rasping through the headlines because of craters of love becoming glabrous above the halvorked entropy of newsy Newport News living above Virginia in Deep Impact legends tipsy on shipwrecks happening too soon to be  immaculate in any crimson style of an inescapable rhyme scheme trying with clambered witticism to achieve belletrist while escaping capstone filigrees of untouchable Terry Crews.
Flickering whimpers of the scary impenetrable Kansas City brain of the touchy hedges of fumigated marstions of erratic flackeys of breweries enthused in an amazed skullduggery of time slipping on crackles of fizzgigs of clambered retinues of radical roots between a tight avenue and a broadened broadway limping on the cinemas that belong to the truth and not the rickety barnstorm of ostentation encased by bonanzas to pontifical to create a topspin of HappyGilmore erasure in bridewells of roomy litigation in uncomfortable contortions of contacts without lenses to excuse.
In the cavernous spelunk of 1990s crimson bleeding into the  expansive liturgy of the ripples of percolation cornered into diminished vacancy anointed as ritualized contrition craving a tighter grip on the tightest swank that could ever be parlayed into New England madcap screws the hunters of the hunted hypocrisy become the travail of the antagonized epiphany of flackey rice in avaricious retches beyond the squabble of punks in due times for clockwork tickers and tickets swarming with infested blemish
The ridicule of sapience is the knowledgeable manicure of livid lurid hypertrophy in exaggeration of the knowledgeable tongue of the Flemish foundering on seaworthy chemists of menace and muse too suburban to ever be urbane bourgeosie limited rankled rancid rancor of ramshackle rackrent gouges too much of a Beetlejuice excuse.
Rhythm for the fulcate furrows of the hypogeiody of epochs slinkywith aced endeavors for misadventure likened to the greatest oiler in the 1980s terror list is a craven capture of photogenesis in rapture that fastens seatbelts of strawberry deaths of crackles of blinkered hubris accelerated by the twisters of vulcanized culmination blasted for history for headlines in ravines of mastery beyond the persnickety prestidigitation of magic sarcasm in the avalanche of dynasty never nastier than violence vile in acerbic posterization of plumage that is blacker than Rush Hour in the menace of Dennis in fractal philosophy funneled into one brittle muster of height rather than weight in freakish geometries of squirrels battering a home run cast away in fracture
Tracey Sep 2020
I died yesterday. The pain was worse than I thought it would be. They say it will be different but it’s not. I’m here to tell you so.  The burn pierced through my flesh as the bullet searched for a place to exit.  So here I am now, standing on the edge of a cliff with hues of brown and grey.  I was expecting more of all of this.  No bells, no whistles, no angels or unicorns to soothe the torture I thought I’d left behind.

My escape plan failed.  Now what?  Ginger clouds on the horizon and not another soul to be found.  With a deep breath and sigh,  a resignation lands on the half smirk on my face.  I’m well aware that we humans can ***** up life but what the hell with death.  A mere mortal soul left here to linger for all eternity playing memories over and over in my mind.

I died yesterday.  It’s over rated.  I see now the faces of the ones I left behind.  I do feel bad for the ones that loved me more than I loved myself or life but some….wow.  I can’t believe they had the nerve to even show up.  I hope it makes them feel better.  Mind ******* me while pulling my life force out like a taffy stick.  Pulling until they got it all than had the nerve to swallow.  It’s ok.   There are plenty of people like me, bleeding hearts holding space for beauty in a Beetlejuice world.   I hope the party celebrating my life with them cheers them up, poor people.  The sorrow will be soon lost over a week or so when they realize they never were invested.  Keep the flower you killed.  I don’t have a vase.

I died yesterday.  I’m sort of getting use to this.  No one is ******* children, ******* animals, mutilating women’s genitals.  No one is popping out kids just to get a government check and good God…yes God there is no politics.  The best part is the silence.  No cars, no honking,  no ******* rap music.  No parents screaming at their kids and Christ.  A group of broken people sheeping it through that thing called life.

I died yesterday because I couldn’t hold the light for the world.  I couldn’t even hold it or hope for me.  It’s too ugly, too deep and too *****.  I’ll just stay here in the middle and hope that they see me here.  I’m not so bad, not to soul *****.  Maybe just maybe I’ll be seen.

I die everyday.
Jet Mar 2018
1.6
6.
I was wearing my beetlejuice underwear.
Taru M May 2023
this night already happened before
  don't say the words
that's like conjuring Beetlejuice or Candyman
but it is already written
that when you turn right
there will be a black cat

Snap!

and the ground is sinking now
can you feel the sand swallowing you whole
begging for your crown to return home

a pile of rocks perfectly balances on a needle
the record scratches
who is playing DJ to all these botched transitions
lost in another groove
reverse melody meltdown
more sinking
beyond the lyrics
subversive subtext subtly soothing
it would feel so goo to just let go

a black cat is balancing on a pile of rocks that's balancing on a needle
one tectonic plate shifts
everything is off
the PH of your saliva tastes like copper
blood drips from the nose, the brain is dry

this night already happened before
it is already written
that a shooting star will streak your consciousness
but only for a second
are you sure you saw it
you drool in pennies and loose change
it melts into the sand
which now covers your shoulders

what if you're drowning so slow that help isn't even a thought

the brain is dry
balancing on a black cat that's balancing on a pile of rocks that's balancing on a needle
at this point everything is toppling down
so slow that time envies its grace
wait for the drop
It. Is. Legendary
like synth trap house jazz infused with rock
a metal rod replaces the spine
balances chakras lifeless
the ending is copied and pasted

another crown returns home
and the sound is silent
and oh-so-purrrrrrrrrfect

— The End —