When you see her cry,
You want to die,
When you see the tears streaming down her face,
You lose all faith in society,
Due to the reality,

As she sits in the dark,
She fights a shark,
The shark of depression
That has made a major progression,
As she cries,
You feel so confused,
You don’t know what to do
So you cry too,
You want to help her,
But you’re afraid that you’ll stress her,
So you give her some space
Being careful not to give her to much
As she falls in to the rut of suicide,

You go to call her,
No answer,
So you call over and over,
Each time with no answer,
So you go to her house,
You knock on the door,
No answer,
So you knock louder,
Still no answer,
You open the door
What you see is to forget,
Her blouse just hanging there,
Hanging by the rope of death.

May I go back to You?
     I'm sorry I've strayed. The wrecked trail looked so strange, and this stubborn heart of mine can't resist the foreign, the deranged. I'm sorry. I strayed.  
     I've bawled my eyes out so fiercely. I cannot seem to shovel the snow off this path, or tuck my hands back into the warmth.
     Take these ice-burnt palms of mine; take this lousy shovel, the pen I tried to use to uncover those layers off me; take the need for nicotine, for the viscous cycles that bound me in a life of backsliding, no ears to hear or eyes to see. Guide me, Father.
Guide me home,
set me free.

have you ever felt
empty
have you ever felt
shattered
have you ever felt
wrong
9 days ago
I broke
9 days ago I decided that I wasn't worth it
I was shattered and empty and wrong
I woke up that day
I faked it so well
Laughed at work
Dressed up for a wedding
Then I sat in my hollow car
My thoughts echoing from window to window
I just needed to escape
my head
my car
my life
I couldn't fake it anymore
Antifreeze and sleeping pills
then it gets blurry
Hospital for a week
I don't want to say I attempted
because I failed
I am trying to be grateful for this second chance.
Waking up everyday
choosing to live
choosing to fight
Attempting was the most selfish
thing I have ever done
It wasn't for attention
I wanted to slip away
disappear
escape
fade
I am getting better
I am finding reasons to live
realizing that I am not nothing
I think life is worth it
It's going to get better

I have given my all
It just wasn't enough
It was a long road
So much of it rough

You've seen the best I have to give
But that's not what you need
It's time that we move on
Before you see the worst of me

Better we part friends
Than to leave broken and bitter
Better that it ends
Than to watch our love wither

No more Journeys left to take
No regrets as I take my leave
I'll not call us a mistake
Nor will it take us long to grieve

You'll find your way
And I'll find mine
Nothing left to say
One last kiss....we'll both be fine

Your hands grasp but can't hold,
As I continuously cling on to any shred of hope
Despite what I'm told.

Your frequent departure
Has become routine,
When you board your flight,
I remind myself that it can't possibly be me.

My hands grasp, and they reach
Toward your place, your things,
and some type of consistency.

What a thing it would be
If someone kept track
Of the times I've felt in need.

What a thing it would be
If I could remind myself
that the only person I need is me.

Because your hands can't seem
To recognize me,
Even if I'm inches away
In your bed,
Yards away from a light's beam.

Your hands grasp but they can't hold.
Even when my hands is in yours,
It doesn't change the way our story unfolds.

The readers must be getting bored,
Because each chapter ends the same,
Each chapter beings with your same
Lead being the one I follow and go toward.

But no, the angle must change,
I need not your lies, or broken promise,
I need not the pain.

But we know how the story goes,
You'll be back in a few mornings,
And the redundancy continues to unfold.

Because my hands they can hold on,
They can hold on and on and on.