Many days
And the thoughts lay scattered
Never alone, lost, too shy
The words jingle jangle
Sometimes loudly chattered

Many days
Busier than busy
Dizzier than dizzy
Happier than happy
Testing capabilities
Fulfilling Responsibilities

Many days
Work never completely done
Sleep it’s a necessity
And some fun
Walking on the Sun

Vaguely I recall
Shiny little eyes
My precious baby girl
Feedings in the nights
Heart beat to heart
Now but a stain on all my art
Two small boy and a baby in toll
Three years of the single parent roll
The rest well, most of us know
The pain of losing everything
Even our own soul's
So many the years
I let the pain
Take the wheel
And steer
In my dreams
I still hold my baby dear
A tinny fragment
A tear drop of ink
Brokenness runs deep
In all my poetry
Until my demon sleep
A stumbling block in my serenity
This emptiness bleeding me
..............................................

Emotions avoiding me again
Calling out to all momories
My heart bleeds to feel anything
Heartless
I shakely pick up this pen

Ink rivers of anaesthesia
Singed to these healing pages
Emotions pouring
Like a Stormy winter rain on Sunday morning

Flighted words starting to soar
Cloaked in emotion
like dancing rivers flowing
from my heart it pours

All my heartache and darkness start to dissipate
These pages caging them
Sealing them with all of my hate
All wrapped up with the kiss of fate

Internal demons start to calm
They stopped rattling their cages
The relentless screaming has stopped
Now embedded in these pages.

I inhale the air of life
Rage dispersing
I let go of all the strife
Demons no longer fickle
Silently caged
Calmed to a trickle

Struggle for cognizance
Disturbing nightmares
Invisible spirit creatures
Nerves system villains
Soul *******
Karma demons
Evil shadows
Walking darkness
Creeping death
Fight for life
Battle for every last breath
    **** and consume
Attempt to survive

Nothing about  suicide or cutting
Yet very dark!

You do as you please.
I'm just a human,
in the form of a woman.
So of course, you can
do as you please.
How dare I speak up my mind?
I should just shut up.
My no means yes to you,
so why do I even bother?

But that ain't working,
not anymore at least.
This pushover has been
pushed too close to the edge.
Tornado meets volcano;
and destruction will lay upon you.
Let me erase your being,
so you can start anew.
And this time I'll help
by planting in your mind
a simple seed of common sense.


*******.