Your life will lead into a dead end, after mine I'll become a legend. I will not be forgotten, while your body is down there rottin', nobodys gonna remember and I'll be crashing through your head like the planes on the 11th september.

I am relevant and am able to do everything you can't.
The only thing you do is screaming, while locking yourself up in a mental prison and losin' the key matching the sealing.

I am the champion of my state of mind, yours made you a puppet and got you stuck on rewind. I wake up every day and enjoy everything I do, you wake up every night thinking about killing yourself but aren't brave enough to pull through.

If I face problems I am not looking away cause I am the only one allowed to stay and you can't even handle the smallest pressure, your life really isn't much of a pleasure.

I'll die with a smile and yours died long ago, but then I tell myself, is that really so? We're cursed and followed by impiety, cause we share the same body but not the same life, mind and Personality. You're inside my head and sometimes take control over me, but that doesn't make you me.

it was raining that night
when we sat down at the
patio surrounding
the well - lit
building that I used to
love and hate

we were there
and it's almost
impossible
to hear you breathe
as the raindrops fall audibly
on the roof.

"what am I to you?"

was the thing I had never
imagined asking

and I could almost feel
the churning
in the pit of  my stomach
and the upwelling
feeling of regret

if I would ever, ever
like your response

and there, I realized
in a chain of thought that

asking you of what
I perceived me to be

is a
dead-end risk
and the moment
I doubted
'what we are'
I knew
that
things are never going
to be the same
anymore

I tried to focus on the rain
waiting for your answer
and you muttered
'I don't know'

we drown, together
in the silence
and I can hear us
detaching.

I'm blah blah blah
What do you do for a living?
If asked

Beside maintaining
Homeostasis
Nothing more

Just reply

I am an empty body with no feelings, it feels like my emotions are beneath tons of sealings.
I can't laugh, I can't cry, I just want to say good bye.
I've been hurt, used and left alone, now writing this text while listening to a sad tone.

I have no purpose, no meaning. My Life feels like a nightmare which I am eternally dreaming.
I can't wake up, cause I am not asleep. Everything feels so unreal but yet hurts so deep.
I am locked in my room, I can't see the sun, cause my curtains are closed and so am I, just waiting for the day I die.

  I have nobody around, cause everyone just leaves me at some point and I guess that's fine, as I am dropping a tear in my glass of wine.
I want to go out and live my life, but I have no strength or any motivation.
I rather sit here the entire day and question my creation.

I hate nobody, but that's me. As I am hating myself the nobody.
I can't even think straight or logically anymore, as my heart feels so sore.
I was trying to escape negativity, but it always caught up.
I wasn't fast enough and at some point I've stopped moving.
I've accepted my life, I know it will not change as I am finally giving up on this hope I held.

I will not surrender, I will fend her with my life.
Even if I am already dying inside, it's alright.

My heart's broken and so is my soul
but I won't give up on life, at least not on the whole.

I'll hope and I will forever be,
and nothing will ever change me.

I am staying myself and so should everyone else, it's not worth changing for someone you love, cause they won't love the real you and I hope everyone knows that too.

We all are unique, special and different
and we should stay true to ourselves till the bitter end.

No one has the right to push you around, so raise your voice and tell them out loud.

By Arcassin Burnham

Helen Keller to your noise,
Don't even want to hear your voice,
Its the continuation of bunch of fake smiles,
Don't care about you car or how many miles,
Cause one day everything you have that flaunt in front of me will all be taken away,
I will not be the statistic of a black man with flashing things,
Gold chains and diamond rings is what slavery brings,
Its not a thing when were feeling the same,
Its not a game  , different kind of shame,
You're ******* blind , brains turned to mesh,
Partly why I always sing a different tune than all these
other songs going different ways other than the ways they always go wrong on,
Till this day I am still laughed at by my anxiety,
But it's going to take a lot more than laughter to get silenced,
I have let go all my transgressions and bad memories.


©abpoetry2019

There's one thing that bothers me my entire life, it's not you or anyone else, but me
I feel so powerless, helpless and weak, even though that is what I should seek.
I can't contain this damage any longer, it has to fade and I want others to see that those problems are eating on me.

But who should I tell about myself, I am like a forgotten book in a shelf.
There's no one gonna take me out, untouched and dusty.
I wish I could erase these pages which hurt me the most, because these negative ones are the host.
I am a garden full of dead flowers thirsty for water but all they get are my salty tears, they're drowning together with my fears.

I cannot sleep at night cause I am alone and inside myself ignites a fight.
Why can I not be like everyone else, happy and living without disgrace.
I am depressed, stressed and I can confess that I don't ever felt blessed.
I don't believe in god, someone else or even me.
I've lost myself years ago and with it my dignity.