Is it lying in bed with another wishing you were here?
Is it when I reach over to the cold side of my bed and I die a little bit?
Is it thinking of you when I know you aren't thinking of me?
Is it the dreams that keep me wide awake at night?
Or is it the guilt that consumes my every waking blight?

I'm still trying to figure out what makes me still tick about you,
I'm still fading in and out of reality making myself still sick about you,
Maybe I still long for the person that you once were,
Not the jaded being you are now that the world has cursed,

You ask love forgiveness it doesn't ask you,
For what is love without driving one’s own self to insanity?
Love is about chasing ghosts until you are that ghost,
Following wherever the apparition appears,

Love seems to be the chasing of one another’s unwanted souls,
With that and only that do we find a home in being alone?
I guess so,
It seems right,
Oh so right.

Your love is an ocean
and I am drowning.

Saltwater stings my eyes
and burns my throat
as I desperately cry my S.O.S.

You pull me down in waves,
my lungs aching for air.

Who knew it would be you
who has me struggling to breathe?

The water somehow calms me
with its silence.

I find solace in your murky depts.
An introverts daydream
all alone in 145 million square miles
of torrential rain
only to share my final moments with the sea.

I sink
deeper
and
deeper
I stop fighting
and let go.

For a moment
I may not be breathing.

The pressure against my chest is undeniable.

I open my mouth to breathe
but I only chock on saltwater.

My lungs fill with tears.

I swear I hear a voice,
be it my oxygen suffocated mind
or you
whispering to me.

You break the ominous silence
with seven simple words;
"Some love is to strong to fight"
and with that
I close my eyes
and
       give
               in
                   to
                      you.