They don't know
I smile knowing this but inside I burn in despair
Conflicted, I find myself staring at my shadow
I wish they knew
I wish they didn't
Its the "what comes after"  that causes me to hide inside my fragile skin
Its the "what if" that has my heart throbbing
For now the lights will be off and when you come looking for answers, I won't be home

My finger tips is as cold as the heat of hell,
Inhaling and Exhaling chemicals that is running through my veins into my brain, i call it anchor, heavy as it is.
a secret i share… "i write when i'm choking.." Shhh.. , the word of silence and a verb of order to keep the darkest secrets.
     **welcome to wonderland.

Shhh...
Close the shade to the windows
of your soul.

Listen... Listen... Listen some more
Do you hear it?

Silence. Yes. Lets listen for a bit more.