Why can't I do anything right?
I can feel the rope around my neck getting tight.
I am not sure if I am having an anxiety attack,
but my vision is fading to black.
I should shut up!
Seriously
I don't know why I keep talking,
but my breathing is getting balking.
My heart is going the speed that my fingers are flying over the keyboard
and I can feel cramps starting to erupt,
and I am trying to hold them tight,
trying to press everything right.
But with shaking hands it's not so light!
All I did was drink
2 glasses to be precise
and the next thing I know
is that I wake up to apologize
to a girl that I love
which I called a **** for fun
And that's where the drama begun.
She asked if a was already down the drain
And even with a clouded brain
I saw the mistake in her spelling
and thought it would be fun to be the one telling:
“Are you grammatically incorrect?”
And all I hear this morning is the loud voice that yells at me
“You are rekt”
And she is right, I am.
I hurt the one most precious to me
Just by saying something that I thought was funny.
Running my mouth is like running a train.
An unstoppable force
until it rolls of the rails.
But from now on I'll keep quiet,
I swear to you, my dearest one,
because I can't see you being gone.
I wrote this very fast. Just pouring all the electricity spasming in me into this poem. So it might look very chaotic. The thing is, she will probably never see this, but if she does I love her and I am really scared that I have ruined everything this time.
Maybe I will send it to her when I grow the guts to do it.
