The world is raw
And reeling
You are kneeling
On the cold side of the
Road pulling grass out of her
Downy fur feeling the still-
warm blood soak into the
Knees of your skirt and
You are feeling the hurt of
Intestines that are
Not your own Ropy, Uncoiling,
Stretched like homecoming banners yet
Homeless in the dirt
Your lips are bitten
Raw in the fury of the heartache
And your head is
Reeling drunk and there are mudslides
Rolling from your eyes taking your mascara,
Motherhood with them
And pooling at the bottom of your chin
Dissipating in drips
Her blue eyes rest like
Heavy-lidded sea glass and you
Remember a time when they rolled
Like waves full of new worlds
And you choke on the past
And you choke on her fur
You feel the crush of a
Starched and polished night
Falling fast
And you choke on the headlights as they pass
On down the highway
And you fall asleep holding her hoping
Your body will be enough to bless and
Keep her warm Hoping that your
Breath will be infectious as a cold
Until jarring hands pull you out of
Highway grass and flashing lights
Drive you back down the road
And you lay her body in the yard
On a red blanket
Soft fleece like blood and loose guts
You're alone now and you lay your body in the
Seeds, the pool of blanket
And you fall asleep holding her Whispering
Pleasedon'tbedeadPleasedon'tbedeadPleasedon'tbedead
­Like a stuck record

God writes "No." inside your swollen eyelids
With a ( . ) it's final
**Pause for breath