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nat Feb 2019
i will live and die alone
the thought stabs me in the
chest

repeatedly

it punctures my jugular
and i bleed out on your carpet

i got too high again
nat Jan 2019
yr parasitic brain
doesn't understand things
without a beating heart
if there's a life to steal
you'll **** it away
but i can't blame you
you were born to destroy
anything with a pulse
including yourself
i'm not stupid
i see the teeth marks on yr thighs
have you got any more spine?
any more nerve to **** me?
i don't try to stop you
i hate the feeling of being alive too
this *****
nat Jan 2019
heart aches for something stronger
a bond, never broken
filled with flesh, blood, and ****
leech off each other till one of us dies
don't know who will get sicker first
nat Jan 2019
blood in my hair
can't really remember
what yr face looks like
makes me sad
but i can't really feel it, y'know?
i love yr sick veins
i hear yr heartbeat in my brain
wish i could feel it
i wish i could feel something at all
i don't know why people like this one so much
nat Jan 2019
feel it heavy as it presses down on my heart
and handcuffs me to the bed
my brain is filled with glycerine and
old cooking oil
my brain is fried.
thoughts of addiction riddle me in my sleep
i don't feel safe in my own body
trapped here, i live by a clock
i go by what time i need to eat
eat, ****, sleep
eat, ****, sleep
eat, ****, sleep, cry
nat Jan 2019
bathed myself in bleach
and scrubbed my skin with rubbing alcohol
when i light myself on fire
i feel somewhat better
and i have swept the kitchen floor a lot
almost obsessively
but when i walk around i still feel dirt on the bottom of my feet
i am surprised i still have the ability to feel anything
i tried drinking gasoline and licking flames
like megan fox in jennifer's body but
i am a freak and a coward so things didn't work out
still, i am used to disappointment
and i am used to hating myself

— The End —