My genitalia, I  have no control over
It's not my fault my body wanted it...
No control over the unwanted arousal
Unwanted but pleasing arousal that arrived with every violating,intimidating meeting of skins
In fear, but it was delighting to feel in power
Feeding of my woman nature,
the ****** power of a woman
He controlled me with the fear he fed me
I controlled him with the pleasure I provided
What a pleasure,
what a guilt
what a guilty pleasure..
Egos face to face
His macho begging me to be submissive
I kept trying to convince him,
I kept trying to convince myself that I wasn't weak,
for the weak is the one who desires
He desired..
The weak is he who needs,he was in need
Although thinking he was in power,
I was in power, for I held what he desired…

- Frida Virrueta

That idolized word of yours - "virginity" - and my nature fail at getting along
Virginity steals my freedom
Why does my desire for ****** activity have to make me impure?
Why must I disengage from an uncontrollable arousal to be considered worthy?
You make the most sacred activity seem so unsacred
As if with every touch I lost my value
Why do you make my nature seem so unholy?
As if with every touch I stained my soul
What am I losing ?
If only gaining physical,emotional, and spiritual insight

I want to live
and
I want to die.

I want to scream
and
I want to cry.

I want to bleed
and
I want to heal.

I want to be numb
and
I want to feel.