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Have you looked at your lover?

Their skin. Warm and soft underneath your fingertips.

Fine hairs, sleepy glances. The corners of their mouth lifted into a smile.

Sometimes, it's like peering into an infinity mirror. You see yourself reflected ten-thousand times; you are them and they are you.

Their touch is home and ******* it, you're homesick.

What do you do when your lover's kiss no longer welcomes you?

When anxiety has it's claws pushed into your chest and you can't help but wonder:

What if they don't love me as much as I love them?

Am I a burden?

Am I too loud? Too soft? Too hard-edged and manic?

How can I trust them when I've been hurt by others before?

Love can't cure depression.

Romance won't wipe away anxiety.

Through sideways glances in ***** mirrors, microwave dinners and cuddles under warm blankets—

You smile. You cry. You move on.

You don't have to love yourself to be loved in return.
You are worthy. Recovery takes time.
Still,
like a morning breath,
one stood.
Rays of purple,
arose over skin.
A familiar coloring,
as the moon was birthed from the night sky,
and the purple transformed black.
Sitting still in one's skin,
an internal scream,
and shattered self promises.
Left too little,
to be blossomed beautiful,
once more.

Unmute.
And not an uncommon sight,
a child sits in a solitary corner,
eyes salted as he witnesses the screams,
of his parents choke the air.
Not much sense is made,
in blank silence.
Not much sense is made,
in unharmed skin.

They laugh.
They sigh.
They let the wind blow away,
the precious moments of stability.
What becomes superior to it?
The force,
which converts one's ego,
to harm another.
And develops a promise,
that is a new shade of purple..
a perfect tear to his eye,
another breath struggling to be taken.
The wink of the moon is a forgiving description,
The locks of your hair, brittle and worn,
Every tomb you forebear has a decaying inscription,
Your empty touch can drive even the most stoic to mourn.

Unconsidered by nature, but naturally torn,
The weight you must bear is never applied,
Vengeful at your mention, and your destruction they've sworn,
With the strength of cyanide, but your effects shall never subside.

You keep your fair distance,
Through your eyes you see no favorite,
Sickness plagues all at your mere insistence,
You're a people watcher, a natural behaviorist.

I can't avoid or dismiss you my love,
But Death, my fair maiden, there's not an hour you go undreamed of.
 Jan 2017 Sienna Luna
Gidgette
You said to me,
" Wow, I think my heart beats an extra time when get I too excited."
I thought " Its because my heart beats in there too.
You are my heart disease,
As I've given my heart to you."
Refined, I'm sweating gasoline
Set myself ablaze
Just to light the cigarette of my dreams
My natural state has changed
But hasn't stopped getting in my way
Takes a drink to strike an ember
Stagnant black glowing amber
Cooking my assumptions with timidity  
Chaotic pieces tempered into
Wavering unpredictability
Directionless enmity
Enemies at wind
Cooled to harden
Forced to torch again
.
Your face,
Louder than the moon,
Drowning me
Out into the long night,
Is so warm,
Like sun tendering heather.

Your voice,
Lifting me like a feather,
Into great sky
Weightless as I fall high,
Downy and rich,
As babe is swaddled nigh.

Your touch,
Sets my weary soul aflame
And I call out
Into the night carving names,
Writ in comets,
Yet to crash, that I am starlight.
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