He did not put her on a pedestal
nor made her his queen.
Instead,
he wrote her and made her his favorite song.

White is the happiness on her wedding dress.
So pure and radiating.
But white can also be the cruelest of colors
for it brought sadness alone,
the day they covered his tombstone.

It has been raining peonies and carnations
since you said "hi"
and I have been walking on
cherry blossom-covered pavement eversince.

So I would like to take a rest.

Because my hands are swollen
from writing your name
over and over and over again.

Because my eyes forgot how to blink
whenever I see you buy coffee
in that cafe along 7th street.

Because my ears only hear
your deep voice
and triggers the fault lines in my body
waiting to attack like an earthquake
and cause major damages including butterflies, no, dinosaurs in my stomach.

Because my nose hallucinates your smell.

Because my lips long to call you all day,
all night, every hour of my life.

My senses go crazy and becomes uncoordinated.
My knees go weaker and I can't move but still smile like an idiot at the thought of your being.
You make my head spin
and you make my heart twirl
like a circus girl.

I beg you to stop sleepwalking in my dreams!
Your once unfamiliar face keeps on popping up like a surprise.
I tried to shove your ghost into the darkness,
into the abyss of my subconsciousness
but you keep on escaping with the ladder my heart made.
I vowed not to ever think of you again -
to make you a stranger once more.
But the heart is cruel,
It plays and gambles
until I lose to it.
This heart is very cruel indeed.

I whispered my words,
enveloped them,
and sealed them
with a little bit of loving.

Let me hear you strum my hearstrings
and let me sing the tune of your soul.
Let's create a melody,
A harmony that is you and me.