You work with a powerless handmade heart, in which you let me conceive from the start, dismantled words that were never set free, here's my chance for you to be me, now tighten that noose we are about to ride, these feelings inside I can no longer hide, true emotions that tend to spill, until I drown in my soul, and prey my ****, like a plan gone bad with no excuse, my labor adds up but there is no use, nothing to win and nothing to lose, my entire life with you I had no clue, open your mind and stop and think, that what you've done has made you sink, to the backend of the ocean where no one swims, I see you float with broken limbs, poison control is my title, my name tag reads "strictly suicidal", with God as my witness and satan as your idle, your breathe will stop at your next trial.....

I’ve been staring at this puzzle piece
Its missing a piece
Or two or three,
Its a hand-me-down.
Why did my mother think it could satisfy me?
Passed from child to child,
Charity to Charity
It’s broken and bent
Its missing
Dad you’re missing

A simple crash is all it took
To encourage a nervous and curious look
Into the bathroom where my mother lay
A blood bath around her, in the middle of the day.

Oh honey, please just look away
You should not see this, please do not stay.

Self-help never works, I could finally see
As she covered her tracks, her eyes never leaving me;
But the evidenced razor lied on the floor
And the pile of pills poured out by the door.

Oh baby, please do not let your father know, too
He wouldn’t understand, the way that you do.

And all of my words held deep inside
Hung on my tongue, my lips were dry.
All of the times you spoke only through words
Left me so confused, viewing life backwards.

You are beautiful, and just so pretty
it is the inside that counts, don’t be so petty.

Oh but momma, can’t you see
How do you expect me to love me?
When you have so much hatred towards yourself?
Enough to clear off the medicine shelf,
Enough to starve, binge, and purge;
You always told me to have some courage.
Enough to cut into yourself: thin and long lines;
You always told me, we would be fine.

But how could this painful sight be so?
Please bow now, mommy, an award for your show.

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on that sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Stop and think, now call my name, this **** has made me go insane, you have no face, only eyes, that bury me down like hollow cries, pull my throat until I scream, I'm fairly nice but he is so mean, follow the arrow to a pleasant hole, now crawl inside because you have no toll, **** **** **** is a final dream, dangerous ways of a ****** team, bounce my brain until it breaks, hidden bodies in polluted lakes, here we go now draw your plan, label your gender *** of man.....

Pulling my veins from hollow cracks, pushing my prayers to the max, lying down inside of myself, open courage and ******* up wealth, drowning in the mist of sobriety, like a raw egg shell that is chipping away in society, leave the trap that tends to hold, my curled up skin that feels so cold, is this me or a ruptured cell? That was cloned on the out skirts of hell, blessed within my tearing thoughts, just give me a home to tie these knots, severed ends that choke within, my flying heart and evil sin, I ache inside with recycled hate, no disposal but is it too late?????

Ruined space to make me try, over and over I hear my cry, block this blame from my path, think out loud and do my math, cut me open and steal my pride, I thought by now it should of died, burn this case which was never dismissed, plot my move without a kiss, turn my blame in every direction, to find my way to a new selection, hide this chain but not to far, land this pain with a bleeding scar.....