i feel all alone in this great crowd
loneliness wraps my heart like a shroud
it's been a long time since i had a friend
for how long can i smile and pretend

darkness encroaches my soul like a mist
and punches my spirit like a clenched fist
there is nothing but darkness in my heart
the feeling of emptiness is tearing me apart

many times i've tried to tame this beast
tried to exorcise this evil like a priest
each time i have failed miserably
strengthening the beast considerably

i can not keep fighting this losing battle
my hand is weak and my heart is brittle
years of heartbreak have taken their toll
it has killed my spirit and crushed my soul

now it is clear to me what i must do
it's no easy task, but do it, i have to
there is only one way to guarantee success
that is to **** the body the demons possess

Life is a funny thing, it’s always been
Just when you think you are up, it drags you down
With every grasp I try to reach
The elusive promised land

Walked many a mile, I have
But I am yet to see
That glorious land
but get there, one day I will

Then all my sorrow will be gone
All my tears will be wiped away
I will not tire anymore
finally I will be… home

I’ve come a long way to get to where I am
but the daemons keep on pursuing me
for every step I take towards the light
the dark ones are inches ahead of me

I’ve been down many a rabbit hole
and climbed back out in tatters
I’ve run towards the morning sun
until my feet were heavy and weary

I climbed to the top of the mountain
I worked my way up there
and in the faraway distance
I saw the promised land

I kept running towards the city of light
I ran with all my might
the closer I got to it, farther away it was
seems like it wasn’t meant to be

But giving up is not an option
Where will I go if I give up?
I have nowhere else to go
So keep trudging I will

When you are tempted to doubt my love
don’t …
When the uncertainty starts to creep up
stop …

I am deeply flawed
but my love for you is not
it’s as pure as it gets
I love you with all I’ve got

I love you with all my heart
deeper than the deepest ocean
higher than the highest mountain
purer than the purest gold

do my mistakes erase all we had?
have my foolish actions destroyed everything?
Have we lost the love, never to be found?
is it too late, have we lost it forever?

What can I do to make up for my sins?
what price can I pay for my transgressions?
can I ever be forgiven?
or are my iniquities too great?

Please forgive me…

They said as the girl grows
the less the father knows
the once daddy's little princess
would be a conniving *****
and he wouldn't be superman
just a man who screams and hits

and as she sees the world
she wouldn't see just a father
she'd see an uncle a husband a man
and question is she was in a trance
a trance thinking he will always be a savior
till one day he comes home not sober

and he starts being conservative
to protect her from eyes like his
unknown that she has seen enough
he doesn't know about the hands that laid
how she screamed "dad come help"
hoping he'd save the day
but alas he isn't there
he's in a far away land
a land where her grades are slipping away
doors locked and room always a mess
how she learned to talk back
slam doors, hit walls
so he lays a hand too
and names it "discipline"
now she dreams to leave the house she knows
she's behind the locked doors waiting for eighteen