Does your boyfriend do all these thing that I do for you?
Treat you the way I treat you ?"
It was clear why he was asking,
Everyone wants to look better than their opponent.

Then a moment of silence slipped in,
And a flash back of nothing swept by...
Those were all the memories I had with my boyfriend.

"He probably will also change when he has me,
right now he just wants to be the better man"...
I told myself.

"Of course!
He treats me well...
He even does more than I could ever ask for"... I lie.

If he had paid more attention,
He could have spotted my hesitation.
If he had paid more attention,
He could have known I needed a hug.

He could have notice the cry for help
Behind my smile.
That I wanted him to try harder.
I wanted him to convince me...
So I could know i was worth a fight.

But sadly he backed down,
Turn his back away,
And has never looked.
And I can't run after him.
All am left with is the promise I made to my lover.
And the thought of "what could have been"

Your presences is like the brightness of the sun,
The joy of feeling it's rays after a cloudy day.
You melt away the cold in me.
And your warmth embraces my whole being.

In the darkness you are like the moon.
Your light brightens the atmosphere and gives me comfort.
Like the twinkling of the stars,
I can never count the good you have done for me,
Nor can I measures my love for you.

You are like the quiet night,
So peaceful the kid in me comes out to play.
The thought for adventure rushes through my vains.

Like the sun rise
You you losen my grumpy face,
And leave me with an undeniable smile.
Like the sunset, that I wish may never pass
You are the moment I just wish to live forever.

I love you

Who could have known for sure that it would come to this.
From longing for love I knew I wouldn't get,
To denying myself the chance to be loved by another.

Then in the silence of the night,
Between the lines of speech and poetry.
Between the lines of speech and sound.
This time I saw him differently.

Passionate being,
But broken here and there,
His mind so broad,
But his heart not trusting.

Could he give in his whole?
Or maybe am just like the rest of his past?

My mind heart falling deeper,
But my mind reminding me of a lover I never had.
"What if he finally changes his mind?
What if he opens up?"

Surely I feared that,
But now I understand when people say
"God's timing is the best"
A lesson learnt so well,
That patience often pays.

I sit still thinking about him,
While I still wonder what on earth ever dared to happen.
How on earth did we come to this,
How did we seem to be just a match made in heaven,
And how well have I forgotten about my fairy night.

All I think about you,
By my side and your breath brushing through me face,
Your warm magical hug that makes my stomach boil.
All that beauty so precious.
And a passion to love so vehement

"So do you still write?"
A close friend asked.
"Not so much, I haven't had anything to write"

She secretly wrote in black and white.
Typed, and edited her work.
But it was so unbearable to share,
She held all her present miseries she wanted left unsaid.

Even till this day they still stay in her secret place.
For those feeling and moments are hers alone  to keep,
And so many of them for her to burn.

She has been so broken,
That little girl inside of me.
She couldn't leap for joy no more,
Her worst burden was faking a smile.

The pages to her books, socked with tears.
And her passwords, changed every week.
She has been hiding this part of her from the rest of the world.
Avoiding her reflection,
But she couldn't do it for long.

Accidentally looking at that splintered ******* the mirror she had been avoiding all along,
she begun to speak;
"Okay, this has been going on for too long,
You are not broken,
You are not weak, you can go beyond the odds.
You are deserving,
How do you expect to keep helping others if you can't help yourself?
Wipe away your tears,
And put a smile on your face,
For you are surely the best,
The most amazing,
And the world needs you,
Be strong for them, and for yourself too.
You don't need a man to make you happy,
Neither to complete you.
You don't need comfort from nobody,
God is your comforter,
God is your love,
You are beautiful and wonderfully made.
God did not make you for this dismay.
He called you the light of the world,
It is time to arise, before your light goes up,
Stir up that gift before it is too late,
You are more than a conquerer,
So why do you cry?..."

She went on and on.
Though it at first felt so awkward,
She begun to feeling change;

The burdens on her shoulders melting.
The walls over her heart breaking.
She begun to see those tears drying,
Her voice a little more clear.
She begun to see that spark in her eyes.
She was breathing again.

And finally,
She saw her beautiful smile again.
And She knew that, that little powerless girl in her,
Had finally transformed to a woman.