Forget safety.
Live where you fear to live.
Destroy your reputation.
Be notorious.*

Rumi

I sit here and anticipate the pain
As I reflect on this most recent
Revolution around the sun
Alone in a steamer trunk full of memories
Your seductive smile from across the room
Has hardened into a glare of disdain and
Contempt which freezes my heart with each icy glare
Your scent like jasmine flowers wafting on a  cool breeze
Filling my aura with joy has soured
Into putrid and stagnant pools of revulsion
Your laughter once the driving force behind my self-esteem
Has been silenced by disgust and horror
My wit no longer clever to your mind
My sarcasm no longer endorsed by your approval
These tattered remnants of hope drift
Between my fingers like a moth eaten quilt
Once my muse, my reason for creating, the inspiration for the god within
Has taken flight for another star
And left me with this ink stained scar

Our bodies are lampshades

Dimming our true potential to shine

How do I forget
these things
when they keep me up at night,
tossing and turning,
torturing me in the silence.
How do I forget
something that hurt me so deeply,
that ached in my bones,
and created an empty void in my being.
How do I forget
these repeated “mistakes”
that pump anger in my veins
and create doubt in my mind.
How do I forget
about all the girls
that probably still remember you,
have your pictures still,
have a part of me that doesn’t belong to them.
How do I forget all of this
and move on
so I can sleep peacefully at night
and not worry about betrayal
and the loss of the one I love
and would have given everything to
If only he asked.