Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Let down all my life.
No encouraging words.
Left with a bad taste in my mouth.
You where not the greatest father.
You where the greatest con man.
A slide of hand a well polished lie
Everyone swollwed.
Now all the fathers day reminds
Me of how you where never there.
You knew more about other people's kids than you knew about me.
I wasn't a boy called Stephen.
I was a girl called Stephanie.
But I still wasn't enough for you.
You left me out of everything.
Never once did you buy me a new toy.
Never once did you take me out.
Instead you acted like i was a punching bag.
Something to hit when people didn't
Like you, and could hit my mum
Because it would be hard to explain another black eye.
So I will raise a glass to you.
The worldest greatest con man and
Say thanks for nothing.
Because that's all I ever learn from you.
You can lock yourself away,
Pretend that everything is fine
Bury your head in the sand
While a acting as of nothing
Really matters anymore
I have been down the same road
I have learn from experience
That hiding does nothing
The problem still testers and grows
The depression get worse by the day
You can run if you like but just know
This you will be running forever
Push everyone away if you want
I will always be the villain in your
Story but just know that hiding
Achieves nothing
There's no shame in saying I
Need help.
This came from an heated conversation I had with my sister in trying to make her see that hiding and running away everytime something gets hard doesn't solve anything
 Jun 2020 Nellie 55
Jodey Ross
As I lay here, the two of you beside me, I feel at peace. And though I can't sleep with all of the thoughts running through my brain, I feel as if I don't even need to. You both give me the strength to keep going. I know that fights happen. I know that things get tough, and money gets tight, and days get tiresome, but I also know that I will always have a place to call home. A place where I can finally rest my eyes and collapse mindlessly into a warm embrace that will mend all of the wounds I may have had. I have never felt such love for anyone until I met you, Adam. I never thought I could feel safe to let my heart run to someone again until you beckoned it your way. And I know this all sounds stupid and maybe it's because I'm sleep deprived, but I want you to know that you mean the world to me. I love you with my whole being and I truly hope you can see that.
 Jun 2020 Nellie 55
annh
I
may
play the
joker, *****
the knave, covet
the queen, and tuck
the ace of spades under my
pillow on a ringed moon night,
but I am forever shuffling the same
deck of cards. Marked cards, imprinted
with loss and patterned with misfortune. Co
urt cards dressed in ill-fitting suits, each face as
familiar as my own. Four seasons, four pips; twelve
months, twelve crowns. One card for each week of the
year. Sequentially pred  ictable, and as underwhelming
as a rigged roulette wheel. U ntil, unable to distinguish
between the red and the    b    lack, the picture and the
plain, I fold. Void of      co     ntracts, and bleeding
widowe                            d blanks.
.....So.....
deal­ me in,
but deal me unpainted
and unmastered. Deal me clean.

‘If I can just have one last cut.
Do you have a plan for the new?‘
- Alice Notley, In the Pines
 May 2020 Nellie 55
Whit Howland
They are at their best
and most beautiful

when hanging
on a nail

driven

into a wall
or the weathered wood

of a door

because then
they become an object

of nostalgia
which turns to inspiration

each day I find myself
more

and more

adopting your patterns
your rhythms

your pug tenacity
and dauntless courage

I miss you brother

I hope you never doubted that

Whit Howland © 2020
An abstract word painting. An original.
THE RAIN IS SO DARK

The time of dad's passing
I've been restrained
All the day long
I've looked at the rain.

There isn't a smouldering
Hint of a spark
I can't see for nothin'
The rain is so dark.

The stormclouds are following
One on another
They tred on the heels
They're so close together.

The date of a death
Is when pain was born
There seem to be many
One endless storm.

The first major hurricane
2020 has seen
Was the health & work crisis
Of COVID-19

Then the stress on good friendships
Because of the news
People fussing & fighting
For differing views.

THEN Minneapolis
Had a white killer cop
And others stood by
As a black man's heart stopped!

Now, these are DEATHS!
We HAVE to RECEIVE!
Deaths of our innocence
We no longer believe
In man's basic goodness
No way it's retrieved
We must accept now
And we have to GRIEVE.

My father survived WWII
Lived 93 years in this mortal stew.
But now he's left... years ago? TWO.

When I was a child
Oh, SO long ago
I used to LOVE thunderstorms...

... what did I know?

R.I.P. Clinton Eugene Jarvis

Cathy Jarvis
(C) 5/30/2020
Next page