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GCM
Summer brought so much pain
Dont know if I'll be the same
Been some years  since you passed
I would give it all just have you back

Sleep well goodnight
You'll always be on my mind
Sleep well my friend
I know one day I'll see you again

I miss the times we had
And the memories we shared
When I close my eyes
I can see you great big smile

Sleep well goodnight
You'll always be on my mind
Sleep well my friend
I know one day I'll see you again

This I must testifie
You have touch my life
I wrote. This for you
I hope it gets to you

Sleep well goodnight
You'll always be on my mind
Sleep well my friend
I know one day I'll see you again
I know we will meet again
Well
  I'm broken

        It's complicated
It always is
            
                      And well...
I can't breathe
I can't talk
I can barely ask someone anything

...Just lost in thought...

Trying to say one word
All they hear is me choking
Holding back one word
Why am I doing this to myself?

They look confused now
And crowd me to ask what's wrong
...
I choke on one word
I can't say anything
No matter how hard I try...

"This is not a way to live, this is a way to die"

And how would I die?...
All the words *unspoken

Words I don't know how to say
Words I'm afraid of and long to say
...
all at the same time
It makes me go mad
I don't think I'll ever be sane

...
How does one do this to their self?
But all I know, is that you can't choose
You don't do this to yourself
Not on purpose anyways...

It happens on it's own...

Where you choke on one word
Your heart beats so fast it hurts
It feels like you'd explode
Salt water leaking from your eyes
Your brain just overflows.....
Gasping for air
As you shake uncontrollably...
And lie there and *wait



.....It's so hard to say one word
All you hear is a squeak
Me choking on one word
Like strangling myself till I  have no more...


I am at war with myself

And both sides are losing...
I sit on the floor in the middle of this room
How did I get here?
It's almost noon
There's nothing in here but the words on the walls
The pictures that form from unearthly shadows
The cold wood floor
And a door left ajar
Just a crack
I read the words on the walls
and look at the pictures one by one
It all looks familiar I can barely sense it
My eyes pass over a word and my whole body shivers
These are the words in my mind
I am alone in this world
This universe
A beat left behind and forgotten
A pain so retched
In the silence
It's so loud in my head
It's a rush, an unwanted rush
That's why I write
And now I *remember
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