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Death walked up to me one night,
Slipped me a cigarette
We sat beneath the stars beneath my dorm room window,
Death said, “I haven’t touched you yet”
The next day I heard the church bells toll,
My colleague from theater, swung free of her bonds
The whole campus chorusing, their Kyrie Eleison
Who could’ve known? Who could’ve known?
I knew, Death walked in her just as it did me,
I watched Death take her aside and haunt her as she desperately tried
To find an anchor, to find solace, well hers and mine became the theater
When I saw Death with her I envied her the company,
Our morbid fixations sought through our scripts, both of us cast
The same character,
Both of us popping pills carefully hidden in little soap boxes,
Boxed up with wine and razors in care packages from the same lover

Death sat with me the other night,
Held a bandage to my wrist and lay me to bed
He lifted his hood, wiped the tears from my eyes,
Begged me to dance again, on ankles slit,
Caressing me as Elisabeth

Now I’ve been kissed,
Kyrie Eleison,
We shared the same stage, once,
Tell me what's waiting there for me
Beyond the mist of Chapel Hill
This was pretty heavy when I wrote it but then I saw the German Musical "Elisabeth" and now it's like, hey Death is pretty swanky let's revisit this poem.
#butseriouslythough #whereismyglitteryDeathsuitor #HurryUp
Janine Sleiman May 2015
I used to love this chapter
A part of my favorite book
I showed you it
And you began to love it too
We kept re-reading this chapter
At first it was so amazing
But as the pages turned
The story took a turn
To a different path
And you got tired,
And left me.
You stopped coming
Back each time
But I was still stuck in the chapter
Wondering why
Why it changed
Why you suddenly got bored
But now I understand
It gets tedious same thing each time
So burn the pages
And tear us apart
Our chapter had ended
With no intention of a happy ending.
"Don't speak to her again.."
Echoed through my chest.
  It hurts like hell
It all hurts like hell
Losing her is like losing me
How could this be.
How?..
That question eats away at me.
I wonder if your sitting there writing a million words to express the pain we have been cursed to deal with..
  Apr 2015 Janine Sleiman
Love
I lay awake at night
thank god for my life
and the stars for their light
I look to the morning star and pray
God give me strength to put down this knife
protect my girl, keep her safe and okay
this girl is my sin
One day to be my wife
the girl who I pray will let me in
so dear god, dear stars and the moon
protect my girl, let her get through this strife
keep her safe and okay so that I may see her soon.
Don't you worry
I can get rid of those tears instantly
I can plaster a smile on my face
In the blink of an eye

But what I can't do
Is feel
Because after all these times
My emotions
Just don't work well anymore

So I pretend to feel
A rainbow of emotions
Especially now when I need them most
But all I can feel
Is dead inside
This is kinda depressing but also kinda true
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