if I was not me
would you tell me

would you recognize
the difference

do you know me
well enough

have you thought
about me

enough

so that I live
deep within you

do you have a
model of me

living inside you

if I was not me
would you notice

The bus driver sees people as they really are:
survivors & corpses going for regular treatment,
shadows & lights moving in a tunnel,
loved & loveless reflections in a rear view mirror,
like him, the sufferers of whole-body vibrations
of the potholes & uneven pavements of the road,
the sedentary motion breaking their backs
until everything is saturated in grief, anger & pain.

In the swing room among the crack of eight *****
and the other drivers sullenly chewing their lunch
he writes a history of the young father struggling
with a stroller who slips on without paying,
the obituary of the white ghost with the
5 o’clock shadow who boards at the hospital,
all notes for the melodic line for his sax solo
at Johnny’s that night.

His fingers touch the imaginary valves
& before the movement is over
the road chants for his return.
He puts on his blue cap,
tucks in his shirt & straighten his pants.
The abuse is almost immediate,
starting before he can sit and close the door.
The engine revs with the  melodies of the city
& in the harsh notes, he hears the smooth variations
that will drive him through the long night ahead & home.

Ink
blots
impossible
knots
testing the limits of
a circular drive
one hand on the wheel
the other copping a feel
of his passenger mate
dutifully nursing her neonate
foot goes down
to apply the break
fracturing fingers
is what it will take
to lessen
the voice
avoid
the slade
move
the mountain
tell me, don't floaters
eventually get flushed?

Xenobiotic anabolic apomixes.  The apropos in the avant-garde of eclectic synectics.  Exogamies of incorporeity ideology.  Extenuatingly exacerbating extemporaneous.  Accidence ambience acoustics articulation attenuation actuator arbitrage.  Ephemeral anxiety antonym existential exigence exodus.  Aorist ; spatiotemporal telemetry tactician logistical stratagems.  Executant emulation embark embargo extradition.  Tour de force teleportation.  Extrapolator incarnate encephala enunciate.  Clairaudience clairvoyance, cantilever capacity omnipresence presage.  Entelechy!!!

I’ve been isolated from the world
Nobody but my family to talk to
And they don’t know **** about me

I need to tell them, I want to tell them
But I’d have nowhere to run if I needed

I’ve been isolated
Keeping to my video games and created worlds
Exploring until the repetition sets in

I need something to do
But there’s nothing around

I’ve been isolated
Kept from my friends and my people
Wishing I could talk face to face

I need to talk to one of them, explain everything
But they ignore my texts, snaps, and dms

I’ve been isolated
Listening to my brain say that I’m not worth ****
With nobody to tell me otherwise

I need an embrace to calm my anxieties
But we’ve been banned from touching

I’ve been isolated
And most people are leaving and hanging out
Meeting with friends like it’s a normal ******* day

I NEED OUT
BUT YOU ******* CAN’T STAY INSIDE
LONG ENOUGH TO LET THE *******
VIRUS DIE

We’ve been isolated
but nobody gives a ****

I don't want to hear it
Don't tell me a thing
I am just a person
Who wants to write
Don't tell me anything
About what is what
And what you like
And what you hate
Don't talk to me
Don't approach me
I want to respect your privacy
If you promise to respect mine
I will be polite
But it doesn't mean that I will trust
Or agree with anything you say
I am just warning all of you
That I am this way for a reason
And I am prepared to fight
To keep everything just safe
Fine and dandy
So leave me alone
I am warning you

They say that I’m
Too much to
Handle

Yet they never seem
To handle me with
Care

They say that I’m
Unable to
Trust

Yet they break it the
Moment I’m not
There

They say that I’m
Far too
Insecure

Yet they won’t
Help me
Heal

They say I’m
Cold and
Uncaring

Yet they ignore
What I
Feel

They say that I‘m
unable to
Listen

Yet they are the
Ones who can’t
Hear

They say I’m
Afraid of
Love

Yet there is
so much to
Fear...