I fell to my knees
while I had" danced in the dark."

I asked for "the light"

The sunlight beams warmed my back  
as I took a rest in their "park"

While I "took time" to "mend" all of my broken pieces"
I "stood tall..."
I kept in the "message" while I was at "my weakness"

I put my "pride asside" and asked for "simple peacefulness"
Even while I was rushed through this "simple task"

I "accepted what I had been guided through"
I refused to "see life" through a "watered down flask."

I "mended" my "mirrored visions"
as I did begin
I walked this  "new path to walk"
even though it felt as if  I was "still running through this process..."
"in place" to move "much more, "still, "forward."

As I took the" smiles of those who sent them to me"
in
"support..."

Now this "ship has set sail"
and you shall not see it
"set afloat ," next to such, "parked"
at this "warn out" and "out dated" "Dock."

Ambers neatly sparked....with hope's electric energies...
as I faced the "truth......"

A "snapshot of a brighter future"
as seen through a "lense" of a more "temporary"
and a much "foregiving" "future Picture's"
"Photo Booth."

Empty hours that I spend
To myself every day
Scour my soul like bleach
Empty to the bone in every way.
Why don't you greet me?
Am I different than you?
Aren't I deserving of the same as every one
Equal ,too?
If you cared than you would be there
Not just words on a social page
Or a message at which to stare.
Hearts beat the same blood
No matter what excuses are made
Your absence is like a poison
Killing my soul in this quiet hours
The bleach that blanks out any color
From this once colorful and happy man
He is weakened by the ticking of the clock
From the once strong stance
At Wich he once stood.

Easy days with magic day dreams
I paint these images to my life's tapestry
As I live such brilliantly lit moments
with the creative gifts handed in my sceems
Maybe the messages are questionable
however clear and profound
they are notable
Noble.
I walk these streets passing my light
Shining to all who are stuck in their darlness
I long to see the days where cities shall become
Bright
Colorful
It only takes one soul to start such a metomorphesis
To bring once darkness sunken areas
Back into the brightness

Blueberry sunsets
Orange Citrus sunrises
in this land of miracles and moment's suprizes.
A rollercoaster of weather
Temeperatures vary like Baskin Robbins' 32 Flavors
Winds hit me like whips
Sometimes Like gentle Kisses
Any person who fails to visit here
Doesn't know what they have missed.
The good, the bad, and sometimes the ugly
We also have the great,the greatest, and the greater still...
Our land has a multitood of lands with it's unique magic
More than just the News reported gloom and doom
We have destinations to visit that scream "Nastalgic."

A Stained soul
Endless moments of Pain Painting My Soul in Red and Brown
He endures the worst yet he never keeps a frown.
Ownward he pushes until he finds a solution to the end
of this massive black energy that wishes for at his knees he suould bend.
Rising his sword of strength from within his powerfully beating heart..
this true warrior that battles the darkness from within and all around him
Stabs the force in it's cold beating heart.
As this "moment" of pain's entity dies
Another rises.
He keeps one eye open as he sleeps
and battles still...
Until his victory song is song and the voices shout out in powerful cries.

I will fight to become all that I can be
More than just a shell and an illusion
A soul meant to wonder to perfection and to fly free.

I sleep on a floor
Renting a space
My nephew's crimes I pay for
It's a ***** disgrace.
The cops investigated
What a joke
Now years of bills and poverty
It is a caged monster ready to escape
And put an end to forced humiliation
To **** for a chance to free myself
From forced isolation
Now a skinny white boy
The doctors fail or never wish to help
a financial and emotional gun against your

Head.
What do they wish for me to do?
To suffer so much
The albatross  tightens around my neck
The pain suffocates me
And I swing in life until I'm dead?

Motels and arguments
People want their money
Pay up or emotionally suffer
As they tell you how worthlesse
You are

Until one of you snap and never go very far.
Older but never any wiser
Same situation
Never an exit
I wish to run
But their chains
They bind me
Until I accept the reaper's invitation
To end myself
To end this pain as I grow slowly insane

When will I be an equal
As seen through loved ones eyes
If I'm the crazy with his head floating in the skies

I break to  sanity
Here they go
They are angry to hear reality
Due to the acts of blind revenge
Now the sounds that are crucifying a human life
Cut him down due to their mind manipulating
Profanity

I walked a long walk
After A Perceived Defeat
From a challenge...I, at first,felt as if I were the victim of hatred's heat...
That I blindly failed to see as a victory.
Time had passed as I lay awake and pondered
What the outcome of all my struggle had meant
It was the power,within myself ,that was to be a warm glory.
I smiled and got the lesson and it's strength in which it brought
A spirit, in me, so mislead,  twisted up and bent.
I thanked the people and events which gave me such challenges
Since some miracles, from life, are painful events
That bring forth the best in us.......A better heart
Such strengthened by not getting a "happy ending"
to a "scary story.."
it bonds the loose ends back together and brings the soul strength and glory.

Starving inside and out
The murderous evil actors
Laugh as they love to see their
Vines of cutting thorns of death start to sprout
People watch you drown and simple leave you there
To battle death's quicksand
By accepting selfish care
By using the thorny vines to climb out
As blood and tears trail from your eyes and body
The cost of not drowning
Was to accept their shallow and controlling roles
As the fire turns to ice in my heart
Their hunger for my defeat
Feeds these vultures who dine on weak souls.
Now that I may stand on solid ground
My bleeding and weak body is soon to collapse
Falling to the ground

My soul departs from my body
This ghost is a drifter
Who is now free from their thorny vines
I'm a drifting lost soul
A gypsy life
Where at least my spirit is unbound

Stop the maddness
Let’s stop the madness 

Doesn’t anyone care to know?

That politics and the inability to see one another 
As humans

Can lead to a final blow?

Bombs may fall

Guns may fire

We were all raised by parents so differently
Society needs a translator 

To stop the madness and end unneeded brawls 
To understand how another was brought up and forced to live 
Outside of our own fenced up understandings 

And misguided beliefs 

Can we not tear these walls down 
And to learn how to give?

Hope instead of threats?

The end of stubbornness and greed?
So , We , as a world of people, not nations

Can band together and ask for and give another help?

Or shall we **** the human race through egos? 
That feel that they must be right?

And smoke and ashes fill our future generations sights?

Loneliness is a killer

It stalks you in the night

Bends your knees

Kills a once warm heart

In cold fright.

Running from the beast

Searching for a cure 

You swallow the medication 

Thinking this will end the pain for sure.

Your mind Sobers from the blur

You stand up

Heart pounding

Loving yourself

Death’s calling for the lovely beast

Has made its calling

Lady Liberty's Tears

We were once spirited and life building souls
America was thriving

America was inventive
Lady Liberty stood tall , smiling

Shouting to the  world
how warm her flame 
Fired up a nation
sought on more than surviving

We were united people

We worked together and started thriving. 

Then fear, poverty, and misguided politics
Derailed a once smooth running Liberty train.
We made friends of other nations

Pushing our now colder voices and words

As lady Liberty cries and burns out her flame

We must end the quarrels with more than our neighbors

Our nation’s allies

We must live together and rebuild still great 
Neighborhood communities

Heal our cities

We must end the silly family fights

And become a united heart once more

This is where America and the world

Starts the path to true prosperity

And the globe reunites

The Lost Heart in The Sandstorms

My dreams hold secrets into a brighter future.
Compared to the empty and feeling-less moments.
Cuts by despairs knife are now strings of promise held together with hope’s sutures.
Hope is hard to hold when one seems unable to find a heart partner.
Even as friends are too busy to go out and save you from lone travels
Visions of vampires of fear and sadness
That **** hope and energies of light from the bloods which create a mind that starts to unravel.
Others have the looks, support, and talents to locate, attract, and be allowed to mingle with the desired.
Finding an end of this coldness of loneliness
That feels like stress and coldness never seemingly to become un-wired
From a cut up and crying spirit wishing for nothing but another heart to share the hours of his existence
In the deserts of time such falling upon him like sands blurring his vision in a storm
He yells out to the distant lands
Where the desired and once lost hearts are found and these hearts now dwell
Is there room for this one? Trapped in the distant storm as seen and avoided by you, I yell!
Can you see this heart who needs a saving from its unseen place
Where it suffers…
Don’t I shine with possibility?
Or shall I be left to brave these storms and perish
A casualty from the lack of visual importance?

I long for the feeling of excitement
Where I’m seen as a bright and artistic creator
A big and warm heart too big to be invisible
A feeling , over the materialistic, that produces power
Which is ,over this, much greater.
Even though I’m older than the one I seek
I am equal,inside, to her youth.
A kind hand, to lift her up, in my energies of this white truth
I might not have the most grand of looks.
A glance of me, what is it that you see?
Look deeper.
Inside, I hold beauty UN-measurable by any shallow standard.
I see you beauty from your soul and inner self.
I’ve tried to reach you.
How do get you to see me? To feel safe in my presence? A energy absorbed,into you, when your eyes open and see I’m your soulmate in truth.
Many days I’ve waited for you. I’ve waited still.
Acid rain of bitter emptiness from the vacant spot where ,by my side,I need for you to stand
Is preserved there. Until you enter and hold this place,by my side, through true living will.
Here my call.
See my messages to you in my poems and paintings.
My face is handsome, even not the most noticed in the contest of vanity.
I may not be eligible due to the level of your fame.
Life and eternity are not rules forever to govern your will.
Run to the one who is the outside unknown.
For he shall be your protector, supportive heart, and loyal partner in your eternity.
Who calls your name every where he roams.
We need each other
Forget what you have been brought up to know of people alike me in the shadows.
You shall never find this prince and matrimonial perfection
Unless you break past the walls that are safe reflections of avoidance of the unknown.
Bust through the walls that keep you reliance on the small prudent crowds​ in which you blindly over rely .
Once you run out of your prison, have both worlds of Fame and the unknown in which you join
I shall forever stay by your side. A true destiny. Soulmate merging,with you as one.
We share become even bigger than the others in your group.
We are the permanent​ flames of energy that no one can ever underestimate

I am Alive!
A being who is free!
Like the wind, he can flow quickly, or gently float among the clouds.
His spirit is full of energy.. A powerful force that is the brighter sort.
Never using itself for destructive motives or false importance..
He never hides behind a shroud.  He shines only in true beauty.
Beauty is not flawless skin.
Ugly is never a valid term for a beautiful being.
Art is never perfection.
The flaws,within it, are what make the creation worth while.
If all of us were alike, there would not be "beauty," only "Numb and Lifelessness Molds who were mass produced."
The oceans are full of many different visions of fishes.
A rainbow of art that has never,fully, been discovered and explored.
Just alike the fishes in the oceans, which are all different from another, you are that beautiful specimen...that one fish of millions that is ready to be discovered.

The days that lead up to this country's birth
were filled with burning hearts
****** Battles...
Freedom Signaled By Victory's Bell.
The best things , in life, are never free.
The days may feel like Hell...
The death of those snakes from which gave as a good rattle.

The nights can be lonely and cold like Winter...
Your Burdens might be many....
Determination is the most valuable of ingredients
In this spell of "Magik."
After the struggles....Comes the outcome...
Victory.
One becomes even stronger after those snakes of doubt
Stroke us with their mind blurring venom.. which made us sick.

To give up means that you are not willing to live.
For the struggles make us all unique....
A character worth writing of or about which to speak.
This country endured a lot of pain and dark days...
Yet this fine country never dies.. It gives...
Even when we are at our lowest points.. The gift this land gives, Freedom and The right to be an "Individual"
Who has the right to say how he feels..to live as he wishes..
It's a wondrous feeling...
Like a fish..who is a needed  part of a school...freely swimming with the other fishes.

Nuclear Contempt

Up and down
Roller coasters of ideals
Most of these thoughts
The rich man steals.
Fires flame from the tinder of corruption
The cold waters of conformity
And regulations prevent anger’s volcano from hot eruption.
The heat dies down after showers of excuses
As the evidence is covered with cowards ashes.
To right a wrong
The history that lead to this moment
Must be rewritten
Reinforcing the good that shines from the bad
Without the courage of these new “change writers”
The world would burn
From flashes of nuclear contempt
From hatred of the contempt
No future can we have had.

The night sets in
I met my match
I lit the tension
I caught the flame
Now here is another self game
I battled this sin.
I write down fluid emotions
As I have timeless times with the world
As such out forth came my talents
To entertain my world
As I have kept struck devotion
In sweet and honest motions
A man , his world, and a great new new movie
Of his life never left to the ruins
Of neglectful ashes
He never strays
He goes forward
To a brighter future
It’s “groovy”
He’s true to his game
Now they sing out his name
In his own words
The songs he writes
His Entertainment history is made
He is seen, smiling, walking to another
Great destination on future’s pavement.

A moment spent in waking day dreams
I sell a newer moment
For a newly rewritten night mare tale
Of the fall of my fate
In the newly splashed visual effects
I snap from this role in stronger and more feeling aspects.
Here he goes
Another “historic” tale of his to tell
About how one man becomes stronger when he fell
Than ever he was at his sanest or clearest of moments
Let the clinics and morals of the controlled “sane practitioners ” protest
That don’t intimately or personally know the real and inner passionate soul
That where evil society tried to wage their tolls
Upon a greater warrior
I hit them right back with huge , more powerful flames
In their hunger for games and glory
I hit hard and defend others alike me
To pry open the oppressors cells
And widely open their once locked doors
To let brighter souls who deserve brighter fates
Run free

She entered my life ... an angel
A gifted and troubled spirit... us two
We banned together..Nikki and I grew.
Her words of poetry spoke to my heart.
As I had made my written story ... come alive...
I received a message from a lover from a news article...
A brilliant voice ended Nikki's beautiful start...
Her spirit still speaks to me
Even after all these years
She was so brave and powerful..
Until Madness took command..
It won the demise of a beautiful hand
She was sent up to the gates of the gold that entered the promise lands
So I talk to her every dark time that this same cruel voice that speaks to me and ended her
She relights my way
I smash the monster away
Now I am the bright and fire lit author
That shines, on, through endless days.

I look out into the rains falling
from Mother Nature's Tears.
My heart pounds
Sweat pours from my body as my soul is terrorized
By the lack of tools to climb to a successful future
remain out of touch and out cries my fears.
There is no guide up this mountain to my destination
A country full of obstacles, monsters, and money hungry "healers."
I try and force myself to a calm place
However my "Happy Place" is recovering from a recent blast
Of shards of attacking memories of the past.
Dreams of a blackened future and I'm still on the run
from these monsters chasing me since I was a child.
Now they are not as peaceful...
They are the predators, in my waking hours, that haunt me in the wild.
I run like a cheetah and hunt for my needs like a lion.
I have no "Pride" or "herd" to rejoin after my hunts.
I am but a lone wolf...
Misunderstood by my own kind
to another pack leader...They are now the weak ones
following their leader
who is now blind.

Broadcasting signals across distant shores
Not a signal is received
As the tears of lonely echoes turn into damaging rains
Blood lost to life's razor
empty pain - they always seem to pour
from my broken up soul lost to debts and becoming a controlled puppet
to a failed system
where one stays sick and poor
as the rich and insane are in control...
World War Three breaks out due to their ill-faded actions
Another "over-bought" idea purchased by followers believing in an already broke faction.
Where do us invisible souls go?
Where greed, shallow lust, and non-trustful "social leaders"
fail to trust in those of us who have justly earned our right to be by their side?
Lady Justice was once blind. Now she sees in only red,green, and through sunglasses designed  by the rich and famous.
Those of us who do not "stand out" for her now blind reasoning fail due to not being of what she now wants us to be...
As us "puppets" of the wealthy and blind control her and us
as we bleed to death by their powers of insanity
We are forced to silence as our "freedom of speech" is now dubbed "crude" profanity.

A dog chasing his tail.
What does rover want?
Does he want a bone?
Of coarse he does, what, are you a spirit neglectful and willing to let another die on it's own?
Charity is being able to "pay it forward"
and never "thinking" to collect
anything but seeing another spirit fly
Instead of thinking of  such as an "Investment"
And a "Tax" or "Financial" return is from what you wish to rely
Upon through greed and or doubt...that's dark.

Success is in unity
Not in separated greedy people who need a "return" before they can "give."
All this dog wishes, if you do not respect and need him, is his ability to roam free...
If you are not willing to enjoy and be charitable to ensure his survival...
Such is better than a chained life in lack of  thoughtful care, neglectful anger, or self searching and damaging soul wants and needs.....
Ensuring the soul,it's demise, through careless captivity.

I am locked up here
With invisible iron bars.
Serving a sentence due to lack of investment
And doubtful stares concerning my ability to rise up and successfully fly.
Above the prison walls and questionable people…
Who do not owe or know me
Yet they hide and never allow themselves to grow with or meet me.
A bright and peaceful soul turned to a fighting
And disgruntled prisoner
Who demands his due
After years of fighting and oppression
From those who have refused to see
The value of a stronger mind and bright views
Of a more enjoyable future
Others were allowed such after not serving much time in this hell of a quiet, lonely , dark, and unfeeling situation and realm that is my life’s prison
Give me my equality and free spaces in which to roam and flourish
For my spirit knows the truth and will fight for such
Until the shackles of poverty, mistrust, and avoidance due to stubborn views leading up to my sentence
I shall grow stronger and then explode from my purest energies turned nuclear alike Chernobyl
My soul shall explode and take down the oppressors and these invisible bars that they have secluded me in
My Phoenix is my undying soul and will which shall fly away and be free to explore lands even planets closest to our sun.

Connections purely.

My heart tried to signal a letter to be read by one it purely sought.
Friend, lover, simply wishing to grow with another. As loneliness is a universal killer of hearts. A price that most brought
As they ignored my blessings of wanting to get to know and enjoy true times of companionship , from my start, as I seemingly was never heard.
I grew stronger to my truth and loving understanding and sent the one blessings.
Even though I enjoy social networks and photo postings, I wished for my gift to be enjoyed through words of interaction and true care for my art…
My heart might be tired of the long line it walks, solitaire.
Being of a brighter energy, I never grow angry , only feeling pity on those who fail to clearly understand my messages of what makes me me, I give only a blessing there.
Do unto others I have done as I wished for them to do unto me.
Even if my kindness or longing to purely connect with another lady n kind natures never gets returned, I realize I’m doing my part and sets my heart free.

Control. Sometimes it is hard to keep.
Either others take it or one must fight to make such energies stay.
A refugee with a kind heart. He fights for his respect each and every day.
Judged and sometimes counted out
The intoxication of power is the oppressors drink
They become drunk and leave their brains behind
And often fail to think.
Your sanity is tried. You wish to cut their ties.
There is no where to run. It is a catch 22.
They laugh in the distance as he cries.
He snaps to their amusement.
“Another crazy show”
A freak.
“Not any more!”
He breaks out and creates a new movement.
Enjoying a louder voice. A new choice.
To end the conflicting violence and messages by the ones blind leading the blind.
The connected and feeling new world, from one strong voice, it creates a better world through more kinder choices.
Better vision for all..not just the one.
United we stand. We never fall.
Over the oppressors war….
Over all the conflicts
Our army of light has won.

I hear a fountain signal the afternoon.
The pouring waters fueled a rush to my soul's energies.
The smells of hot pavement and the feel of the beads of water
Hit my body in waves of waking humidity.
I felt my senses awaken, further, even though I was awake.
My eyes needed to see the sun burrowing through the billowed clouds..
The sounds of children, below my floor, made a smile appear..
Upon a face muffled with heavy burdens..
I feel lighter, still, as my heart beats with fluid and lively sincerity...
A mind once clouded by pain is now more alive and much more clear.
The smell and look of the green grasses
The city skyline and traffic moving
Started a song in my joy that I was deeply, too it, grooving.
It doesn't take much to create motion in a once stuck and motionless spirit
Burdened down by question and worry...
Now with Mother Nature's Calling...
I can go forth, through this moment, in a brighter mood
and a vision that is much more fluid with her light.
A way that was cleared of humanity's  storm's debris
And the way is much less, to my weary eyes now less burdened, much less blurry.

I awoke this morning with sick passing from my brain
Dark dreams faded to the vision of a sunny day.
My eyes stung as my lungs coughed out the insane
Moments that flashed in my rem sleep
Vultures trying to grab a dying vision..a soul…a morbid creep
They missed as my soul escapes back to the waking hours.
New breaths of a newer moment that are seeds sprouting into beautiful flowers​.
Sipping a sweet soda, I sign in relief, to the promotion of ill faded moments…a warning? Yes.
I am stronger, still. A soul strength muscled to another panic as the morning signals a fresh viewed attack.

I’m just a ghost. The cloud of displaced energy
A soul never allowed to be free.
A shadow of a man…It is seen only by those who need from it’s last remaining power.
I’m a drifter. Barely proving himself through the hard toils of creativity…. Caring for others.
Now this once real and youthful rose is but a pitiful and wilted flower.
They say ,“I’m too old to care for those I yearn for due to my aging..”
Does not wine get sweeter and more valuable if sat around long enough to break out it’s contents?
I fail to see how I have a reason not to float away.
To the areas where days are warmer and the lands are open.
For this unwanted spirit haunting those neglectful eyes
His presence is needed where he is beaneth more hospitable skies.
He has tried to show his strength and beauty in a world where his allies fail to team with him or be truly supportive and helpful to his talented cause.
Debt and medical burden weigh down his will. He fights through these nights of silence.
However, no matter how much he suffers, the ones who claim to be there seem to have better people and events to enjoy.
Than to stick with this lone one and invest in the arts and music that all can enjoy.
He has paid his dues and held back his words.
As he had been disciplined and pushed to be numb to wishing to be real or successful past what they feel is his true potential.
He falls , harder, as his soul Festers and chills.
So, to not be the outcast, placing all I need , asside , is the only true credential?
To being a true friend, to even deserve love?
To even deserve investment into the beautiful artistic functions that he does?
He is unable to sleep at night…Feeling his fate has been sealed.
Now, he needs to build up the courage and fly away.
To where the truer spirits in distant lands shall welcome him and help him, for true hearts nurture the dying souls.
Abandoned and directed by those who don’t appreciate
The beauty he could shine if they let his true nature’s of creation and light, become rightfully revealed.

Traffic and Flames

After I sat for hours in traffic

After enjoying half a medium sausage and cheese thin sliced pizza…

through the hot heat and the sweats I thought

How life could be much more tragic.

Nothing is never as easy as one might make it appear….

Those fake survivors disappear.

Struggles can define and educate us…

However, they do not make a life.

As sick and lonely I might become…

From these hours in waiting and lack of money

due to these bills that I am paying……

These words , creatively I write from within my mind that plays…..

They shall never stop playing.

Honesty and strength are my tools…

Not just protools.

I guide the beat with the songs of my life…the struggles from within

that sharpened my mind as such like a switchblade knife.

I might look awkward with imperfect teeth and a ***** looking face.

However, as deadly or cowardly I might appear in your eyes…

I’m the strongest soul, a roaring and raging fire, that burns

and challenges the most challenging of places.

Blood rains of tears
Pouring down from the clouds of pain.
Covering faces of fear with it's deadly fogs...
This lone soldier shall never go down from such in vane.
My bones might ache
My soul maybe in turmoil....
He shall never quit or hold back for anyone's sake.
He shall win and survive.
He is beating the odds.
As he thrives.
In this land where poverty weakens and it sometimes kills.
He voice for the lost is louder, still.
As his heart beats a rhythm for all strong human wills.

Indestructible

The bills pour in.
I am sick from the pain.
Here it goes…
A hungry white boy grows ,slowly, insane.
Does he give up or give in?
He fights, harder,still.
When the world tries you, enough.
That’s when your endurance begins.
I’ve been in survival mode for so long.
It never let’s up.
So, this older redneck must stay strong.
Fighting for a better life..
To become a legend before I die.
Nights can bring me to my knees as I cry.
I am never beat. I edge,onward yet.
No one can **** the energy of this soul.
Not one thing can I have to drown with tears of regret.
I’ve suffered through physical pain and mental exhaustion
Stains left inside of my head.
However closely with the reaper I’ve danced
I never was the one he dragged out,dead,

As daylight marks the end of a long and insomniac night
I yawn to take in fresher air and to also breath out tensions
Of worries and uneeded doubts that freeze the once heated heart to fright.
Imagination brings my creative flame to a roaring nuclear blast
Releasing much burdened energies insanely stored within my core.
My pen flows with such releases as my brilliance ushers the loneliness and lack of confidence to another place and in my relaxed and cleared mind, I can start to explore.
Newer roads leading to more fresher and more exciting portions of my psychic that I had once burdened myself, uneededingly had gotten​, and was too blind to see this light.
Now, I feel the heat of my beating and creative passions flow through my soul until I spark to a brighter light through being the artistic..
Mind that is in awe..Relaxing with further breaths and taking in the beauty of the dawn of day..
I sink back into my chair
Without a word , from my concious and overthought arena of life, has tricked me to say.

Doubt is the venom that kills the miracle it sees and it questions.
Things are not always made as false miracles to trap the weak or the lonely of hearts.
See thy actions as clear and beautiful.
I have no ill gotten gains in which I seek... no lustful meaning to these loving words...wonderful!
That is this selfless spirit who never seeks darkness from the bright souls in which he longs for...
In love, friendship, and in unity...yes!
This one male heart beats still truer than most false seekers.
With my many flaws, I never hide them. I try and change them.... a true bless!
Confess!
My gentle hand is holding open to gently grab upon the one who chooses to reach for it.
Beauty at the top of where I pull you too...
Do not regret..... or pass it!
For I offer you the flames in which true love is fueled and remains, forever, to burn.
Let me hear you speak the words in which for me and my true heart, in such you truly yearn!
Hold me, tight!  NEver stop growing with me!
What beauty I seek is not simply the outside, but, the inner beauty that makes your outside glow!
Together, you and I shall enjoy unity's miracle.
A true force...so pure that is unselfish and non selfish hunger for simply conquests!
It is the purest of reasons for you and I to hold one another and become the newest spectacle!
An energy booming far past our mortal shells.
I hold this hand out for the one who can understand my clear and sweet messages...
You take my hand... we shall than stroll through eden's sweet garden passages!

I write these words
Hoping to draw a soul to share my quiet nights.
Where emptiness eats away at my soul like acid.
I'm a bright and loving man...yet not a word has yet to be spoken....frights
Fridged and empty hours fill my mind like the cutting of the ticking of the clock.
"Why can't women see the good in me? See my beauty? My worth of my pounding big heart that yearns for love and passion?"
"What creative beauty I bring as I ask for nothing? Is there not a way that I can earn another to mend my broken heart?"
"Why must I be the one who has to be alone and like it for people to see strength in me that has been built up, in me, since my life's start?"
Patiently, I await the voice who will answer.
Who will see my kind natures.
Who will cherish my brilliance and my worthy soul?
To furnish this lady with true love and never shall I give into idolizations of her flesh?
To the gods, above, I implore thee "cease this love curse that continues to take on me it's toll"
As I fall asleep, tears dripping upon my pillow. It is I who is happy to weep. As one day my light shall be seen by the one who is right.
She shall answer my aching heart with the miracle of a truer show.
Of a love that sees the best and most purest of innocence in me.
It shall be us two to show the world how true love does conquer all and this miracle shall shine on all others as us two fly away...
Upon angels wings... we love each other, forever, free.

Writing these words down into the poetic universe.
So many places, feelings, and magic shall these words light
The messages to ones feeling invisible in a more perverse and limited central verse.
You are never alone. As I shine upon you these words of hope.
I am there with you in blessings.
Stop sinking in despairs quicksand and grab my hopes rope.
Enjoy the feel of a hand that aims to guide your spirit up and out of darkness.
As I speak these words unto you...
You are now brightly lit  flames among the many...
Instead of the few.
Spread this message to all you see there curled up and crying in the dark.
Be their fuel to add to their beautiful spark
To add to their flames and end their coldness.
As this passage spreads
Few are truly alone
As this heat from my hope will heat others to the bone.

The day turns to evening.
Quietness drapes over the land...
Only the sound of a water fountain and horns from traffic break the waves of stillness as which more action is what I crave.
Some one to share in my creative motions and my heart that beats for another to share this space with.
Now, as I look out my top floor window
As I see the sun lowering to mark late evening...
I think of you and I, united.
As through the visions I see in Day dreams
Make such lonely and quite nice more exciting...
I call out your name and create yet another vision of you
As someday, we shall be together.
And from my true and pure heart, you are hereby invited.

My mother was a gifted soul.
However , even though she is thought as
in "permanent rest"
True fired spirits never die. They live forever.
Guiding me onward as she always has.
I feel her spirit lift me as I grow tired and I fall weak and cry.
She fills my heart with bravery and her wisdom.
Mom has and will always love me.
Even if her physical form cannot be with me.
Her soul walks with me and guides me through the darkest of days.
She knows that I miss her and need her, still.
For even after death, she lives on.
With me. Through me.
My mother's will.

My mother was a gifted soul.
However , even though she is thought as
in "permanent rest"
True fired spirits never die. They live forever.
Guiding me onward as she always has.
I feel her spirit lift me as I grow tired and I fall weak and cry.
She fills my heart with bravery and her wisdom.
Mom has and will always loved me.
Even if her physical form cannot be with me.
Her soul walks with me and guides me through the darkest of days.
She knows that I miss her and need her, still.
For even after death, she lives on.
With me. Through me.
My mother's will.

My mother was a gifted soul.
However , even though she is thought as
in "permanent rest"
True fired spirits never die. They live forever.
Guiding me onward as she always has.
I feel her spirit lift me as I grow tired and I fall weak and cry.
She fills my heart with bravery and her wisdom.
Mom has and will always love me.
Even if her physical form cannot be with me.
Her soul walks with me and guides me through the darkest of days.
She knows that I miss her and need her, still.
For even after death, she lives on.
With me. Through me.
My mother's will.

My mother was a gifted soul.
However , even though she is thought us in "permanent rest"
True fired spirits never die. They live forever.
Guiding me onward as she always has.
I feel her spirit lift me as I grow tired and I fall weak and cry.
She fills my heart with bravery and her wisdom.
Mom has and will always love me.
Even if her physical form cannot be with me.
Her soul walks with me and guides me through the darkest of days.
She knows that I miss her and need her, still.
For even after death, she lives on.
With me. Through me.
My mother's will.

Mothers celebrated
Mothers gave us life.
They breathed into our lungs our first cry of existence.
Showers of praise to the years of giving that she has given us.
Such is Beauty. A sweet cake cut pieces from like a knife.
We owe to her respect
We honor her and mothers who have past
Through carrying on her legacy and messages
A magic energy forever cast.
As we celebrate on this day the honor that she deserves 
All year long
Blessed are we to have her in our lives and in our hearts
A sweet love who had brought us in the world and she protected and directed us.
Cheers to her, the sweet and beautiful lady, forever celebrated in our hearts.

I held in too much pride.
Such made the truer me
So much easier to hide.
Fear of being seen as weak as I admitted
That I needed another....
I smiled, instead, and wait for the right moment.
To show the golden dream how and why I care
Why I needed her touch
Her loving presence by my side.
Such is a living dream ready to be played as a movie
On the screens of destiny.  Ooh , a proper ending, we need ohh so much.
True love and in its strength our breaks in our spirits, together, can start their mending.
For you are my "sister golden hair surprise."
As the famed Julian Lennon sings as our theme song.
I call out the name of my Mona Lisa.
Seeing her frown turn to a smile
Is worth more than anything of greed, lust, or fears to vanish in a time from now, not too long.
Always feel my care and best wishes.
For my truer feeling and meanings to become a pair
Is indescribable
As to why and how much I need you there.

I felt the weight of the world
Then your visions came to me.
I felt light as a feather...
I felt my dark world brighten and become less blurred.
I felt your soul yearning for mine.
Visions of our sweet bodies fused and entertwined.
I tasted your kisses.
I felt your sweet touch...
It was the remedy to life's problems that was what I need so much.
I felt the passion and the dedication of my beating heart....
Singing out to you.
I could hear your heart sing back....
My spirit felt less blue.
I saw images of our bodies becoming fused together
Passion burned us , sweetly, as we caught glimpses of our future.
Forever.
Young, though years apart.
The right mixture of youth and wisdom
Which shall honor family, making more of such,
Feeding the need to find away to speak to you and gain your sweet attention.
For, out of true and honest longing to be next to you, sharing a life.... that's what I long to mention.
So, you know where to find me.
I shall long for your reach
As the door opens, she
shall grab and hold me , tightly.
My sweet lady shall stay safe and warm in true love's design
After we made the decision to stop waiting
And we run to one another.
Growing older and wiser , together, is what I call a "happy forever."

The nights are when I think of you
How to reach you.
Shine the light from me to you.
What do I wish? But to hold you in my arms.
Stroking, gently, my fingers through your golden hair.
You are safe in my arms.
I shall never let you go.
Just reach out and great one who admires you from afar
As distance can be traveled as love is worth the effort.
As you gaze into my crystal, blue eyes
See past my defects
For my magic shall warm you
As my soul yearns and bonds for yours.
As we meet and finally allow passion, care, and fear to melt away....
The worries of the world melt as do each other.
For with you, I can brace any storm.

"Send in The Clowns"
Linda Ronstadt sang on as mother wept
I was quite young
I become bruised by her drunken and stabbing snake's tongue
I worked long nights as a teen
Avoiding the hell that ruined my youth that forced me into a man's role
I raised my mother like a daughter as my dad worked.
He was blind to her unplanned brutality.
Her life almost ended many times due to drunk stunts
I rushed to the phone as the pediatrics asked questions
over scars and ****** wounds she forced into my arms.
Blows that winded me and were blunt.
Bad boys homes
Escapes from her terror as she took in the poison.
As she waked sober. She was quite a charm.
A loving soul mixed with dealers and her boyfriend pimps
I was fearing the smile of the circus until I immersed into insanity.
Changing schools like underwear
Sitting in therapy. Not uttering a word.
The shrink wasted time, lifting her skirts, and left me empty and broken there.
I was afraid of the tornado of "Mommy Dearest"
as the volcano of tame-less  evil.
The drink rotted her brain and body.
She would break as I was thrown through a window sill.
"Mommy please stop this pain."
Years and years the storms rolled on.
I road the roller coaster to car crashes and ****** fights.
A storm crushed family left in blood stained tears.
I stay strong and helped lift them up.
Their "rock of loyalty"
Their "Honey" in a broken cup.
Her sins felt like my own
Now I held the same drink from which it came.
Insanity in ***** and wasted years.
Now the pain's voices I've endured
They can sing and close me up.
But strength and a true heart can never be tamed
Even on through the words of blame.
I can laugh at the vary likeness of the clown I had feared.
Clowns stay happy without meaning.
I am the one you see walking tall, still.
See him write, sing, and create.
For true wisdom and beauty are not bought or given.
They are not even just a beauty that is enjoyed skin deep.
This strength prevented me from drowning in fears waters
which were ,then, way too deep.

I was a run away
I feared my parents due to insanity
From moments of beatings, threats, and abuse.
I kept one eye open every night as I slept
As I heard the creaks on the floors as they crept
I started drinking and drugging from flash backs
that played dances in my soul like "Foot loose."
Discipline by religion and the fear of God.
I tried to change a shameless family
who truly loved one another
but could not show it
One by one they had died.
Witnessing their last breaths
as their souls poured out and settled the agony
We became closer after their last times
Tears fell
I abused myself  through toxic drinks, friends, and near death
roads I had traveled with them into Hell.
I still am the run away child
Running in the wild.
I was pimped out, stabbed, shot down.
I cried as I handed the realtor the keys to my childhood home
That I was forced to sell.
Foreclosures
Forced ****** Corruption
Suicide attempts
Stalking murderers trying to end my voice
I shake every night from my fears and memories
I take prescriptions to end the physical and emotional pain
I stay strong and that's by choice.
I am a fighter.
I loved my father, deeply, but needed to beat back his respect.
My mother's boyfriend, murdered by those he angered by disrespect.
I paid in money to have my family stay safe
When the friend's dealers came to me to collect when they failed to pay.
Sums for bags and sins that were not mine.
I woke in days in a busted up house and hotel rooms
Watched every family member go insane and rush to fame
as they threw away their incense in vane.
I am still the running child. Scared sometimes of his own self.
I had bottled up years of powerful hate and resentment
Stabbed,beaten,*****, and blamed.
By other family members who were never there to witness my downfall.
Bloodbaths, food lines, and Ghetto apartments.
Trashing stores fighting off the corrupt ones
Trying to take away my life
The running child
Struck back like a knife.
Selling his cherished family valuables  to avoid cold streets
Nights without power  or even heat
In a cold building
Fearing me and other family members would freeze and die
I stayed strong and by their sides.
Even through sickness,death and corruption
I awaken from sweating and crying from flashbacks
As I lied awake,further, and I had tears fall as I cry
Missing my lost mother and father
Watching my future grow dim as I drank and partied to end
the heavy feeling over the grim
This running child suffers onward
However as hard and cold as my road has taken me
I never stop
I shine my bright and loving soul
as haters breath words of cruelty into my face
I had to force myself through pain and poverty
still
I am nothing big
I still work every painful and waking moment sharing these lines
As I wish to relate to those running children
Broken by the shameless
Almost taken by lies
I connect to them , for strength in numbers, in these word vines.