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 Sep 2014 Katie
Samara Metz
Pain
 Sep 2014 Katie
Samara Metz
Pain, so demanding.
Always needing to be felt.

Why?
Why can't I just be alone,
without the pain,
without the agony.

You can pull out that razor,
slice all you want.
You're still gonna feel the pain.
You're still gonna feel the hurt.

I'm stronger than that pain.
Better than that pain.

But that is a lie.
Because pain, pain will always be felt.
-s.m
 Sep 2014 Katie
Nameless
“My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains”
my mind as I sit in my overgrown grassy field.
I lie back, and look at the last rays of sunlight,
glimmer across the green leaves of the trees,
that creep up behind me in their sneaky ways.
My head is throbbing as silent tears slip down,
unseen by anyone other than the stars in dark,
my pale cheeks, and my messy, knotted hair.
I curl up in a ball on my side in the blackening night.
I hold my arms tightly around myself, desperately,
trying to keep from completely falling apart.
My choked sobs echo in the woods that reach,
comfortingly, out to me. I am tempted to go;
to climb into my favorite tree, settle in my place,
and just lie there forever-until unconsciousness
becomes my lonely eternity. Animals, insects,
and bugs are dead silent while I cry myself to sleep,
in the soft, caring grass, and my final wish,
before I go under, is that it hadn’t been him;
it hadn’t been me, and that everything would
be back to normal, and it was nothing but,
a sad, frightening, horrible, impossible dream.
 Sep 2014 Katie
Ellen Joyce
She found it impossible to conceive a way to hide the pause,
the pause pregnant with the kicking congratulatory kiss dragging its feet,
holding tight to the symphony of 'why not me?' and glassy-eyed longing.
The joy came in waves; as decades of together subdued the aching -
she reached out to squeeze her hand
its ok
don't be sorry for this - I really I'm so happy for you
You'll be a wonderful mother - I just know it
I want you to have this

And there it is in the silence -
I just want this too

And she'll be there when the sweat is kissing your face,
and she'll take up your cause when you're running in place
and she'll care for your boy, so you can rest,
and when you feel your flailing she remind you you're the best.

Dripping ******* and vaginal tearing are topics for tea
but she can't tell the aching of a womb without devastating a room.
Or tell the secret that she just bought the perfect home for children,
a home she must now cover to hide her own foolish hope.
She sees them sometimes playing in the river of her dreams
and the love swelling daily, bursts at the seams.
But therein the waking reality bites
for this dream is a dream that won't come to life.
Sometimes the silences are worse than the sounds.
 Sep 2014 Katie
Surg girl
Trying and trying
So she goes to ***
She holds the thing in her hand
And she can see.
Not the result that she wanted
Not again.
Every time she does this she has empty hands.
Now she gets help from an outsider
She thinks "It's cold in here & That things go were?"
Now, She's nervous and anxious and this isn't fair!
The next visit should tell her why.
Until then she tries not to cry.
What are the results of the blood they took?
What does this mean? How does her ****** look?
Do they know what's wrong or is this just bad luck?
She is angry and sad and confused as ****!
But.. she still won't give up.
 Sep 2014 Katie
Rogers Enemugwem
I feel sober
or am I sore?
I just don't want
to hurt You anymore

it's no surprise
I'm used to the motions now
how I go on a binge
and end up anyhow

then I sober up for a while
till the cravings return
till I need another shot
till I crank up and burn

Dear Lord, I really don't
want to hurt You anymore
please help me to heal
and stay sober, not sore.

Amen
By Rogers "@BroRogers" Enemugwem.
#HealingIsAChoice
 Sep 2014 Katie
William McDaniels
Oh me, oh my.
Why do I try,
Its like sticking a camel through the miniture eye
of a needle, I see thru every facade.
The things I love have been deemed me odd.

Oust the judgment
which effects the mental
of the masses, whose glasses started half full.
Now they're half empty,
No problem solved simply
by lying and cheating and all of that bull.

Influenced to forgive and forget,
my mind, in time, forgot.
Now I realize who im not.
Not phoney or fake,
I'll make a mistake
This here is me and all that I got.
 Sep 2014 Katie
shh
I can feel
 Sep 2014 Katie
shh
I can feel my tears
Rolling down my cheeks
I can feel my hands
Trembling like the drums
I can feel my heart
Beating as it fall apart
I can feel my head
Aching as you fade
Not away from me
But away from all the memories we shared

— The End —