It might be just me, but I must know.
When my fingers touch your skin my mind is calm,
my day glows a little brighter.
When you leave,
I can’t help but smile and wish you were staying.
The smile on your face always stuns me into silence.
Some days, we don’t even talk,
which feels so foreign. Seeing you makes do then,
unravels the knot that twists in my chest,
tension pulling taut beneath my skin.
We used to be side by side,
but now you’re sliding out of my reach,
and I’m left with an extended hand, alone.
Some days, I worry.
Wake up at three in the morning in tears,
from dreams of the future,
where you aren’t there.
Maybe it makes me selfish,
to want to be with you all of the time.
To see every laugh, see the way your eyes sparkle when you’re happy.
To see the way you gesture so wildly when you talk.
Spending time with you feels like a gift,
or a drug.
I want more and more,
but a little is enough,
it’s got to be enough.
In time,
maybe I’ll handle it better,
not think about you all the time, in everything I do.
Somedays, I watch you go,
and wonder if you’re gone for good,
that I’ll never stand by your side again.
Somedays, I love you.
For some reason, everyday is about you.
Somedays I know,
that I’m losing whatever I used to be for you