I am thankful to this moment,
for you are not here.
You are not
weaving your fingers through mine
nor are you
kissing the center of my forehead.
And yet I am thankful,
for each moment you are not here
implies a moment in which you are.

I am your best kept secret
The one you are afraid to be seen with
The one you can't bring back to your friends
The one you can't tell anyone about.
But I am the one who thought you cared
I am the one who fell head over heels
And I am the one picking myself up off the floor
And strutting out the front door.

I forgot what it's like
To love someone so deeply
Until I met you.

It wasn't like this
'Til the very second you pronounce your name
Like a perfectly blooming flower on the spring's sky.

I realized too
In that moment of seconds
That love isn't the cleverest thing I should ever feel
In my messed up mind.

I forgot
That the last time I fell for someone
I cried myself to sleep and try so hard to be beautiful
Until he didn't like me at all.

And I hate to know
That you will probably
Do that to me too.

Our problem was, very different tastes
Mine was terrific, I mean look at him
His was abysmal, I can't even look at *her

We meet again for a friends night out  
but we both know how this will end.

We dine and laugh and are happy to see one another,
But we know where this will end.

We share stories, dreams and fears,
But we both know how this will end.

We walk through parks and bask in each others presence,
But we both know how this will end.

We'll delay the end of our time together asking as possible,
But we both know how this will end.

You'll hold me so tight I could merge my body and soul with yours,
But we both know how this will end.

We'll say good bye with sorrow and promise in our voices and hearts,
But we both know how this will end.

You will travel home and I will too,
We both knew this is how it would end,
Until next time.


© Misty Bishop-Martiss

i'm exhausted
of Rx bottles and diagnostics
of appointments and waiting rooms
confusions and delusions
of crying on the bathroom tile
and losing track of time
inhaling and exhaling just to stay alive

life's a crowded room if you ask me.

And we say goodbye, life's so not fair.
But darling, when you need me, I'll always be there.
Our path are different, our destinations so far,
but 'tis surely been a walk to remember.

©Aastha