Let us send mosquitoes into exile, To the obliterating cold of Antarctica, In hope that the stars will take refuge In this corrupted Archipelago, till then We shall tire this full moon, lay our lovers down, And burn the shadows As a campfire of our love.*
I tell you it’s dark inside You say turn on a light I say it hurts my eyes I’ve gotten use to the dark I can feel my way to my heart And lay down on its surface I can tiptoe my way Around hopelessness Slip on a few things But not fall But you’re still new to it You still trip on my Newly discovered fears Still drown in my overwhelming Sea of sadness You've gotten bruises From slipping on my silence You have fallen on my weariness And I’m sorry I never meant for it To swallow you too Loving you makes a difference But you can't fix a **** With nothing but a twig You can take a horse to a spring But you can't make it drink You can love me all you want But I have to learn To love myself Enough to turn on the light I will try to ease my eyes to the light But fire eventually burns out Even candles know that I’m sorry I’m not okay I wish I was If only it were To be well enough To look into your eyes And not feel like I’m drowning To be able to feel The trace of your hands on mine And not wish you didn’t have to Feel the scars I’m sorry I’m not okay I really wish I was If only to be able to tell you How much I love you Enough to not die for you Enough to live with you
my skin was rubbed raw because someone touched me on the sidewalk without my permission
one time I didn't sleep for a week because something in my room was out of place and I couldn't fix it
ive stayed up all night wondering if all the doors are locked so I check once twice three times four times and so on untill its time to wake up
the soaps in the shower are put a certain way if not then I feel myself fall apart
Ill clean for days and not sleep or stop once
so please stop saying "Oh, im so OCD!" because you will never understand what its like to have this crippling fear that everything will go wrong if one thing is different
OCD And I We go to couples counseling every week you know, the usual "Has there been any progress?" You see, OCD ... he is a bit obsessive.. and doesn't understand why we need counseling His nails grind into the office chair and slams the door on the way out He loves and cradles me with commands like flowers that bouquet against my mind And the next morning as if the bouquets were to fall over from their steady placed vase, he apologizes. There are mornings where I cannot leave the sheets because his arms are wrapped around my waist and do not want to let go because if he did I might as well be **** independent If he loves me so much, why is it that I must wash my hands after tracing over everything he has touched. OCD says he wants to protect me from all the dangers of the world... and he reminds me by constantly ticking in my head asking me if I locked the door...Yes did I turn off the lights... Yes did you turn off the stove...Yes We went to counseling again this week She says I'm closer to being independent That little by little I will be able to strive without OCD by my side There are mornings now where I can leave the bed without his arms sinking into my waist and his demanding words whispering in my ear constantly "Just stay a little longer... The world is dangerous" Now... when OCD leaves... I tell him to make sure he closes the door on the way out.