If, familiarity and formal views choose
Why not Me?  Over your petty pretty portrayal.
May it might be that my graceless train wreck
chain of always pleasing those, and these, we fools
As lovely and well practiced a beauty spinning
pole-struck, thighs, eyes, dizzyingly ****
as the version before, this one knew to do
Or use any, every, curve, as lustful and,  oh.
Let the vibes and lights try to chase that
which I know only in fantasized thoughts
cause though I know, you know I do want
I'm well passed given up and chasing new
trading being treated well, for the hell you
do your unknowing best to sell the fool that
knew you so well.

Tangerine-tinged recollections
upon a soft field of purposeful blue
Perceptively gentle this hue
seems to bleed to somewhere
This canvas keeps from view
Beyond the edges lay uncertainty
Masterful direction ques or glance
To the nearly too contrasted
Aligned shapes that represent
Every sensation blending into feeling
Too personal, we look upon what
Inwardly lay hidden, as if off edges
The attachments best expresses in colors
It makes us pause, want, recall what was
Fall, take in breath, shed a tear or confessed appreciation of our own inability to be true.

Reds melt and seep, against my the monochromatic, reality.
Whites force back the muted tones if unwashed brushes
Every shade, shape and conceptualized
Intentention t go at only artists can pull from those that pass by such

List my point and considering this a rough work in progress.

Oh, to view our world,
the way I do,
Through my eyes,
dulled and darkened
to the grey and shadowed
and you hide yourself away,
draw tight the blinds and shades
to the pitch black room,
the place of detached distraction
and you become a shade of shadow
a shadow of yourself
as the day, another precious day
fades to the west
and night pours on once more,
the world outside doesn't miss
doesn't attempt to find you
self imposed prison of depression
inside looking out,
view my world, the way I do.

The birth of a thought
Made to play
On my mind's eye screen
Always private showings
Has gray matter paints the scene
Of a life less alone
Kissing smiles and so much sunshine
Lives another version of me
He is counterweighted balanced
Though she remains faceless
This only compliments
And they are so trusting
One always lifting one always holding
Accepting and content such Bliss
My missing picture perfect
Inside weeping I admit I want this
Even when this is longing
A foolish thought forbidden wish
Lost and thought found damaged
A thought played then it ended and then it ended

A well placed whisper,...
Almost like,..
As if never intended
Made lighter, thinner,
whispered...
will seem to shimmer,
much like heat at distance
Sunlight bends,
Glimpses of what lay beyond
dances out of reach,
enticing, inviting,
denying...
random and impossible,
thirsting for promised water
whispers can ruin you
leaving you lost,
walking in circles

To lay my torn up hands
Upon the porcelain past
Cold against the callouses

All but within my chest

Broken glass is the time we had
Grains of sand falling always
our words shifting too fast

lonesome, knowing approaches

Where hindsight provides
The vastness embued by when
Here in a now unwanted

All but in my chest unnoticed

Borrowing tears from better versions
While choking on the words I use
Dreams hold more weight certainly

These hours I stay tragically on then
Far off and away days feel and echo in

Any but this person I spoil my nights with
Nonfunctioning and spilkjngly incoherent

Blue, the hue, each shade
In, many a way, excites Me.
Or, if deeply true,
Calmness, like that of known
Intimate floating, along
Below, light dancing
Cast rays to fight, shadows
But not as deeply,
As I am, down I go.

It was the first time,
I'd ever gone on alone
just to see, to learn, to know
what's gone wrong
and what's missing
Oh, I ****** up
through and through
when at the edge of this world
I saw fog, rising from the oceans
puddles that burn
with smoke that makes one want
motivation in the wind
breathe it in, breathe it in.

I do not need cherish
Nor fall nostalgic
Life before this present
Remains affixed permanent
As the all too collected
This awful present
Of life memories moments
Emotions combined rise
As my state of mind falls
To clean out out dispose
I can manage if I welcome
The bittersweet sadness of
A life now piled in heaps
Embarrassing and awful
Buried and not wanting
To feel those low chords struck
To some its is hoarding
Me I think I'm hiding from
The past.  Buried beneath it.

You,... know who You are
And still I cannot move you...
As if the sum of this is nothing...
All of these dreams 
Supporting just the one...
So many words written
To move o my the One
Outside this fraction of another...
Just pleading to be whole.
A gift, a promise, one for another...
From this one sided vision
Is it too unique for You to want it?
Does it matter I care
This is forever as promised...
And yet that as a thought
Truly moves only me.
Alone with my thoughts.

Fools are we,
You and I
To dare so close to embers

Glowing
as our wants are

Simple thoughts,
and touch
Heated consequence
within

A pleasant pain,
and breath
Flames fed to this

Oranges made
Devour
Salty reasons not
To, do
What you going
To do here
Encouraging the fire
Into new layers

Flames rage
loosed as they are
Burn to blue,
Violets shifting
blinding
to white inferno

As our senses
bodies
press flesh grinding

lost to all but
wanting
To know, having

yet
Our souls no longer
So innocent
Sacrificed

Offered eager
Unto this
hellish pit

As we fall in
so too
do our truths
melt

Down between
Throughout
Aching intimate
Sacred places
Glisten

Like sweat rolling
From your flesh
Tastes salty
Inviting

Feels right
Being squeezed
While holding
tightly

Trailing lightly
Traced fingers
Create such need
shimmer, moans rising

Lost in yours,
Giving my own
Pushing to
pulling
twisting apart,
spinning swirls into falling
thrusting
and writhing

Fooling
the eyes if found upon

folding in, blending
Out
licking, kissing
Biting

passionate
and
perfect

waving in and out
Our maelstrom
builds

Stretching and I
want more

The pressures howl
erupting unimaginable
delight

To be sated
We
All consumed

No more me,
no more you

only

ashes left
blackish-white

Fall apart

Carbon & Desire