Tell me
How does it feel
To do your best
Every single day
While the rest of us struggle
With nothings in hand
While I look up
To you, your flawless air
Tell me
How does it feel
To look your best everyday

Of all the random movement
In the world
It seems no one has time
To notice your struggles
Anymore than one is saddened
By a broken sidewalk
Or demolished daisy
And now I know
How far from here
I have to go
The thought of you
Causes me to tremble
Put in simplest terms -
So much for fine words
No one can live up to them
Let me wake from this
Dream of life
And fly finally past the darkness
That reaches out for the darkness

You try so hard,
And I wish it could be,
But my life's so off,
You wouldn't make it with me,

I'm too crazy,
And you're so perfect,
You'd probably hate me,
Me and my curses,

I'm so different,
I'm a little bit backwards,
So I'm keeping my distance,
No happily ever after-

I know of a place,
where it only rains ash.
The sun doesn't shine,
it was swallowed en masse.
By an ominous void,
that's now stifled the grass.
I'm loathe to return,
but I'll lead you if asked.

We'll journey on over,
to death's little home.
Where graves fill the fields,
in neat little rows.
Not a songbird in sight,
just cackling crows.
Nor will flowers you see,
where the bone roses grow.

Fear
Judged by irrationality
Hidden in accidental oversights
Feeding the dragon that leaks molten lava in salty streaks of regret
Fear
Empty wasted emotion
Saving ourselves from ourselves
Saving you from me
Worst case scenarios never included you punishing me at the sight of my weakness
Fear
You only love me beautiful
Love is a profound type of collective psychosis
Looks like strength but hides the truth
The truth that certainty is the truest delusion
Fear
On my best day, in the best possible scenario, I am still invisible
Open and still transparent
Full and still forgotten
Insightful and irrelevant my thoughts pour out unheard
Fear
In my demon's shadows lives the truth of my vulnerability
I am weak because I love you
I am a warrior because you love me
I am strong because I love you
I am a lamb because you love me
Fear
Spilling my unseen secrets
My evil self-talk, my mantra of honest lies
The purr of a kitten unsettles a soul beginning to believe it mattered
Pain dismissed in the peaceful snores of a tired moon
Fear
The sun shines in hope on the remnants of dream
On the nightmare of forgotten, overlooked, inconsequential truth
Empty apologies and the familiarity of beloved anguish
Herald the realization, that words don't matter
Truth or lies, faithless faithful, and a newfound silence
Fear
Invisible save for the ash lines that tell the tale
Of how I begged forgiveness for sharing my tormented and twisted mind
Only to be interrupted by the sounds of your peaceful slumber
Fear**
To be everything to your everything
and realize I am still........nothing at all