Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
  Jan 2019 imperfectstranger
Ollie
Try
Fail
Try
Fail
Try
Die
Drift
FLY
I wanna fly***
Too many people
Tell you what you want to hear
And not what they think
I woke up crying and scared again
I don’t remember what happened though
I need someone to hold me, but he’s not there

There is no ‘he’ for me
Never has been

Scared and alone in the darkness of my room
I’ve never needed anyone to just hold me more than I do right now…
Eyes on the ball
Sweat falls to the ground
Be ready to move
In my own little world, there is no sound

But all around
are people
screaming
screeching
cheering

The adrenaline spikes through my blood
Stronger than it ever does

All of this
fuels me
energizes me
readies me
for the game

This is why I play
This is why I play

Meanwhile, all eyes are on the ball…
In a room full of people

I’ve never felt more alone

All the lousy chatter

Never seemed so quiet

My insides full of sorrow

Yet a deep empty pit dominates my soul
A darkness so vast and frightening
So consuming and suffocating
It terrifies me
I never fully get a break
From trying to escape

I let loose with my words
But sometimes it never works

I’m never not alone
There’s no place called home

All this pent up frustration
means there’s no vacation
From all these feelings
Next page