Its all blurred lines till you stand back
funny how perspective grasps at those
shadows
irrespective of reality
and its laws.

perhaps she doesn't know much else
lifting her feet flagstone by flagstone
and breathing with a fierceness
which trailed behind her gaze
she fumbled under the twilight haze
mumbling with half shadows and half light,
her life captivated by half truths and half loves
stranded on an in-between
like coral reefs and rolling fogs
she dreamt of a life of absolutes,
crooning with morning calls,
so deliberate in their musical merit
yet she walked with half steps
and lukewarm indignation,
her reach falling short by indecision,
So she anchored in what unearthed her heart
with fantastical reads and splash of color
and afternoon gold-drenched walks
she yearned for a full truth, a clarity
yet little did she know the coral reefs
housed by far the most beautiful
of creatures

I remember nights when I was so petrified, you'd sit outside the bathroom door for me as I'd shower. I remember nights you'd climb in my bed to soothe my sobs and stop my tears from wetting my pillow. I remember when you'd hold my hand and teach me to be confident with my shoulders back. I remember the nights of endless secret telling and shushes to keep quiet. I remember it all. Yet those sweet pea memories are slowly drifting away back to sea with the memory of who you used to be. I can't seem to get you to look me in the eyes anymore, I can't get you to hold me when I have an episode. I can't get you to spend time with me, your baby sister, and maybe its a big sister thing; growing tired of being your little sister's keeper. I dont know. But I know there are no more nights of secret telling, there are no more nights of being held while I cry. There are no more nights of you sitting outside the bathroom door for me. There are none.