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 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Emma
loss
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Emma
She was never sure it was what she wanted,
arguing with a man who wanted her to carry a piece of them both.
But sure enough a small bump formed,
and from the first heartbeat she fell in love.

Everything from then on was tiny socks in tiny shoes,
fluffy cribs in shades of pink and blue.
Excitement and worry and fierce protection,
arms curling on top of her belly in intense affection.

But when the time came, something went horribly wrong,
when there was no screeching and crying to break the calm.
A child, still, unusually peaceful and serene,
she held the tiny shell where her baby should have been.

Everything in her life reminded her of her pain,
and nothing inside her could ever be the same.
Not even he could understand,
how she was stranded in her ****** wasteland.

Clothes and toys quickly packed in a box,
her body still creating milk for a being that would never grow.
she'd have to find a way to move on, living with the constant ache,
of the loss of a person she would never know.
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
ElEschew
Dear little  one
You only grew to the size of a cherry
I should have buried you
Im sorry i was scared
Im sorry i chose my life over yours
I know im not your mommy
But if i was i know id be the most proud
I would keep all your art
I would go to all your school functions
Im sorry i didnt keep you
Im sorry i was to young
Know that momma loves you
Know that you're my one
One day when we meet
i know it wont be sweet
Ill have questions to answer
And forgiveness to beg
But when we meet i hope i can be the mommy you deserve
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Asante'
I could put make up on my face
wear perfume scents that linger
short skirts high on my thighs
have you wrapped around my finger
give you every single ounce of me
share with you all my stuff
And yet somehow always know
that I’ll never be enough
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Asante'
Yesterday, I cried.
Today I’m feeling somber,
But somewhere in the tomorrows
I’ll be smiling again.
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Asante'
I was never intended
To be toxic waste,
The girl spewing
Venom
With her words,
Acid dripping
From the corners of her mouth,
Living, breathing
Destruction.
So please don't share that fire with me.
Get it out of my face
And away from my lungs.
I don’t want your fumes
To poison me.
 Nov 2018 Heather Horner
Asante'
Treating happiness
like it's a
r a c e
is the fastest way to
c r a s h
into misery.
I love you the most in goodbyes
    When I see the sadness in your eyes

I love you the most in a tight embrace
   When a smile creeps across my face

I love you the most every moment of every day
   When you know how to make me feel 'okay'
 Nov 2017 Heather Horner
Anisah
Millions and billions
Of smiles passed
Everyday
A twitch of the lips
A giggle
And a laugh
Why is it that
Even though the sun
Is full
My chest is still empty
My heart fallen
My stomach is full

-By Anisah Mariah
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