I wonder if he hears that song
And thinks of me
If it makes him cry
If it makes him weep
Until his throat is sore
And he just can't breath
I hope he thinks of me

He makes me upset.
He makes me lose my temper.
He makes me change my range from good, to boiling.

He makes me sad.
He makes me cry every night.
He makes me miss him.

He makes me jealous.
He makes me unhappy to see his joyful smile.
He makes me feel stupid when he talks all mathmatical.

He makes me happy.
He makes me laugh with his pathetic jokes.
He makes me smile with a glance of his green eyes.

He makes me love him
with his up down
put me down, pick me up
Love me, hate me
Safe, yet dangerous way of life

The cutter will cut in a cutters world,
the hurt won't stop in a life unfurled,
the blood will drip like drops of rain
eaten alive by sorrow and pain
you will feast on smiles and greed
but Ill just cut and watch it bleed

She wants me to come to Kansas
Said she'd introduce me to the band

I asked her if she'd thought anymore
about letting me be her man

She sings a mean Bonnie Raitt
and she wails it from the heart
Gonna tell the truth about it
Honey, that's the hardest part

There's a white train a'comin
north from Wichita

I want to make it to Lecompton
before the snow begins to fall

I know just what she needs
when she's low and when it's dark

She needs that white train
running north from Wichita

I need to lay beside her
and listen to her heart
Gonna tell the truth about it
Honey, that's the hardest part.


r ~ 12/15/14

I can feel it in my bones.
I can feel it in my teeth.
Emanating from some place buried deep underneath.
I can hear it in your words.
I can taste it on your lips.
Electricity,
recharged by your kiss.
My body is a conduit.
A key tied to a kite string.
I'm thinking of every wish I've wasted on pennies never spent.
Hopes and dreams thought up then tossed.
They're all coming true tonight.
I found my way while staying lost.

Im fine*
Falls out of my mouth
So easily
The words no longer
Hold meaning

sometime I feel so much
rage inside of me

deep seated anger seethes
usually lying dormant till
it's called out

no matter how spiritual I get
I haven't been able to befriend
my anger

anger boils to rage
and I want to take it out on
the people closest to me

the wheel of suffering turns
and I feel so powerless

Do you know what a knife is?
The one your mum uses to cut onions...
Onions.
The best excuse for battered mothers.
Anyway,
Bring that knife,
Hold it as if you're holding a god.
Bring it slowly to your neck,
Slowly, slowly...
Let the sharp tip cut the blossoming vein.
Let it bleed.
Close your eyes.
Do it now, little one. The world needs not another innocent victim.

***** ........ From Prophetic .... to Poetic .... to Apathetic .... to Pathetic ....to Drunk .... to too drunk.

"Do I love her?"
He laughed
As if you'd just asked the bird soaring above your head
If it was flying.

"The sun rises
At the sound of her voice.
The whisper of good morning hiding
Beneath the covers."

"And sets,"
He said,
"When her eyelids close, and I can no longer see
Her smirk shining through the starlight."

"I do not love her."
He sighed
He bellowed.
"I need her."