below the others
   the nothing else said
matters;
but what it takes,
   doesn't take matter,
and is inseparable.

As you can see,
I've never been a prodigy.
Always unimpressive, apparently.
Stressing is an everyday thing.
But you wouldn't care,
You're just so unaware.
Depression has me ensnared,
But you couldn't handle my despair.
So keep your eyes closed.
And I'll do the same.
The things I think about are completely insane,
I wish the good times would never change.
But this isn't my dreamland.
It's a place where I don't want to stand.
Depression is the ocean,
Anxiety is the sand,
And I'm somewhere floating in between it all.

I did it again.
That gun went to my head again.
My arms are bleeding again.
I'm crying again

Is there a point where tears dry up?
I haven't found it.

I did it again
I wrote my suicide note again
I took medicine again
I wish for death again

Why can't I do anything right?
I can't even die properly

I did it again
I pulled the trigger again
Nothing happened again
I say I'm sorry again

Maybe I'll die this time.
Or maybe I won't again.