if "you are what you eat"
was true
i would help myself
to a bouquet of sunflowers
everyday,
because
i want to learn how to shine
like the street light
outside my bedroom window
i'd line my stomach
with old leonard cohen records
so i could sing all my "i love you"'s
i would stuff my face
with the pages of your favourite book
so i could regurgitate the words
you love so much
whisper them in your ear
while you sleep
i'd take a bite
out of an oak tree
cut me in half
& count my rings
there are so many things
i wish i were
i am not graceful
i'd like to make a toast
to every day that i haven't fallen down
or slipped
or tripped
on my words
see, i am full of mistakes
i never learned
how to ride a bike
god, my parents really tried
but the ground was so unforgiving
& i was too afraid of falling
now,
i would eat those training wheels
so i could keep my balance
walk in a straight line
i'd swallow my watch
so i'm always on time
don't be surprised
if you see me
tucking into those sunflowers
please,
come & bask
in my rays.

the second i spotted you
in your barista uniform
i knew,
i wanted to wipe the coffee grounds
from your face
while you bend me over
your periodic table
& join together
our celestial bodies
boy,
come study my astronomy
for one night
you could see my galaxy
in the night sky
so feel the pull
of my gravity
'cause you know
we have
*******
chemistry.

the only knot i tie
is the one in the thread
i use to stitch you a smile
see,
i'm not saying i want you forever
i just want you in the moment
your mouth curls up
at me
boy, i call that smile a library
'cause i want to know
every word you've ever uttered
so come at me
with all your pages
& i'll fill every "to-do" list
i ever write
with your name
over and over
you know,
i can't run a mile
without tripping
or gasping for breath
but i'd lap
your marathon skin
til we both
reach that finish line
that's to say,
i'm not looking to make you mine
i'm not,
i just want to feel your frequency
vibrating around me
i'll let you untie the knots
in my stomach
if you let me climb inside your heart
till it's covered
in stretch marks
boy i just love the risk
of kissing your cigarette lips
with my flammable chest
so light me
& i'll spread around you
like a forest fire
my burning bark
is worse
than your charred bite
but if there's one thing
i know for sure
it's that i'd let you burn me
i'd let you
burn
me.

boy, i love the way
you make me arch my back
you bend me like a bridge
& how do bridges stay up, anyway?
that’s one of the million things
i just don’t know
like how
you curl me like a sunset
it’s always dark when we kiss
but i long to see you
in the sunrise
forget kissing in the rain
i wanna feel you on my skin
like a thousand sun rays
or how there’s a science
to the way you part your lips
when we kiss
like it’s a secret you can hardly keep
or why in those moments
i don’t feel ***** or little
or why,
when it comes to the spring cleaning
of my cluttered life
i can never decide
if i’m trash or treasure
so i hang myself somewhere in between
like a lonely t-shirt on a washing line
what i mean to say is
i just want to ******* HANG OUT WITH YOU
boy,
if bridges can stay up
why can’t we?

I come from the gutter; did I stutter?
Between you and me; it’s one or the other.
Had your back; until we turned on one another.
Testing fate is like playing darts in the dark.
Life changes, people getting picked apart.
Real recognize real: keep playing your part.
New beginnings; no idea where to start.
Life’s a *****; no need for a heart to heart.
Ace up both sleeves; she likes them sharp.
Fat ***** singing; I’m ******* her harp.
You only life once; half the time you are in the dark.
Chasing the American dream; in Congress Park.

If you are trying to change a; person, relationship,  or environment, and it doesn't change - leave before it changes you. Things are what they are; you have no control of that. You are what you will; you have full control of that.

In Klawock stands seven totems
and a madman, chanting under ebon skies
he is embedded in the cedar wood, he is connecting worlds
a master carver, of language without words
of the raven clan, he is tracing ancestry in the wood
seeking the old ways of eagle, wolf and bear
born of water, amid the realms of earth and air
his spirit runs with salmon.

"It is not our place
to mend someone's
shattered heart

but rather,

run our fingers
down every last
fracture and love
like it never
shattered at all."

Placing holy water on our wrists like perfume.
Locking ourselves in chapels,
Forgetting the reason for churches.
Do you remember the day
You carved a crucifix into my forehead?
Used the ashes of Christ as a band aid?
The Holy Spirit guided your numb limbs like
An ungodly puppeteer.

The almighty father smiles sadly.
He takes me in his arms,
Says, “My child, I am not sorry.”