Firefly

Jan 2016

SøułSurvivør

cacti

---

fuzzy denizens of desert
strange, unearthly, every one
they wake up softly to the morning
reaching up to find the sun

saguaros, huge, regal, majestic
silent in their special ways
pincushions the size of quarters
brush protect from the sun's rays

from the blazing heat of noontime
to the freezing winter's gloom
these living jewels survive the onslaught
even burgeoning with blooms!

looking out from my front porch there
I see a bird who's home is made
within the side of a saguaro
within its chicks get warmth and shade

I see beavertail and golden barrel
mammalaria in special pots
lining up along the ledges
of where I sit, my favorite spot

before the sun has even risen
this is my safe and holy place
then i feel the creeping warmth
of the sun upon my face

this is where I worship singing
though the neighbors find it odd
this is where I thank my Maker
this is where I talk to God

SoulSurvivor
(C) 1/11/2016

My front porch is my church
I have Believing friends over and we sit
studying the Bible

It's a better sanctuary than any
"House of God"
Church is not a building made
by the hands of men
It's in the heart

---

#love #life #god #light #jesus #thanks #christ #worship #praise #cacti

Firefly Jan 2016

How Would You Be?

How lonely would you be,
Sitting on the only rock,
Above water in a lake?
Can you cry,
If I were to die,
Drowned beneath these waves?
Listen to the flying shadow,
He cries, he screams, he travels with ******,
Foreshadowing awaited end, floating up,
Out of the water,
I can no longer touch the border,
Of water and earth,
And the transparent evidence of my life,
No longer does it irritate me,
No longer does it sparkle in this underwater sunshine.
How happy would you be,
If I were to rise?
How happy would you be,
If I appeared alive?
-from firefly

My depression came back with a vengeance today. I got beat up for walking weird and talking weird....its stupid as I always talk in a feminine voice( my voice just haven't changed yet so it is actually a little boy voice...but I know I know..I'm 17) so I got ganged and I couldn't help it when I ran to the bathroom to giggle while I sliced and diced...
Please forgive me HP....but firefly has lost his light and I don't think I can manage to write another hopeful poem as I am far from hopeful now.......I love you :( (

#sad #death #dark #hopeless #lake #drowning #firefly #bye #drowned #ihatemyself

Jan 2016

Jude kyrie

A Paper Town Called Agloe

There’s a famous town that does not exist
It’s in new York state in the Catskills.
It is name Agloe.
It’s a paper town.
Put on the map in an insignificant place.
To protect the mapmakers in 1925
from copyright infringement
By unauthorized reproduction of the map.
I followed a map once all the way to
a place that did not exist.
I travelled slowly to it
Mile by mile.
I loved the thought of living there.
I even fell in love with it.
But it turned out to be a paper heart.
Filling a space where the real heart
Should be it had no feelings or love
It was paper just to look like a heart
to outsiders like me.
So after all the tiring journey
to find it.
I found out It never existed.
Just like Agloe
On the old paper map.
But Agloe never
broke anyone’s real heart.

Google removed Agloe from Google maps
it did exist for awhile on there.

Jan 2016

Jude kyrie

A town called oblivion..repost cos its sad

When she threw me out
It was my fault I know.
The drinking had started again.
I slept in the car for days.
Locked out at night.
Yet still I drank
my job was lost.
but not as lost as me.
I remember waking
in the drunk tank.
I was ***** unshaven.
And my eyes were hollow.
She paid my bail.
I saw her through the bars
of the cell.
She was so beautiful.
And so clean and lovely.
She whispered quietly
"I always loved you."
"I still do."
I felt so ***** I needed
a shower and shave.
But living rough is hard.
I quietly said thank you
I love you too.
She touched my cheek
with her finger tips.
Like she used
to touch my skin
when we made love
In our clean bed.
She had tears in her eyes.
As she saw what I had become.
She said softly
You know I lost our son as well.
But tears filled my eyes
as I stumbled away
to that signpost
for the town of oblivion

for all struggling with addictions
blessings
jude