I am but a dream, you are but a memory. I am flying high, you are roots in earth. Your love is a moment and mine is everlasting. You are an untied shoelace, I am double knotted. We once were a wonderful rotation, like the one our world makes now and again but now we are as magnets, forever pushing away from each other.

I search for you in the late nights
at the bottom of the bottle.
I look for you in the embers striving to burn
at the end of a dying cigarette.
I ache for you in the arms of a stranger,
a man with different proportions,
a deeper voice, a rougher face.

I’m searching for you in all the places
you swore you’d never be
just like you swore you’d never leave.
But the pale hands caressing your satin skin,
pale hands that weren’t mine
burn in my mind and
I wonder how I’ll ever find you in the places
you swore you’d never be
just like you lost me,
when you swore you’d never leave.

If our love is a game,
I'm the loser
If our love is a sad song
I'm its lyrics
If our love is a movie
I'm the interval
If our love is a tango dance
I'm the third person
If our love is a clear sky
I'm the one drenched in raindrops
If our love is a novel
Im the character that could not make it to the happily ever after
If our love is a poem
Im the muse long forgotten
If our love is the moon
I'm the clouds obscuring its light
If our love is pure magic
I'm just an illusion of it
If our love is familiar faces and warm smiles
I'm the stranger whose goodbyes are diguised as cute smiles
If our love is the beginning of something new
Im the funeral toll
If our love is a welcome mat
Im the doorbell that never rings
**I can give you
My soul
My body
My mind
My all
But it will never be enough
Cause baby, our love is a sunflower
Im the colorless sunrise..
I'm just waiting for you to realise it
And turn your face away from me

healing is not always graceful,
i am contented most days,
pleased with all the progress
i've made
but some times
i feel the foundation i am building
start to crack beneath my feet
and i am reminded of how
fragile all of it is
and i think to myself,
"maybe it's not too late
to burn it all down
& go home"
and i just
don't know how
many more nights
i could spend
tip toeing on thin ice
just above rock bottom
before it shatters and
i am back where i started

This is an apology
To make up for all the arguing.
I'm sorry
I'm not gentler
Not what you need
Not patient
Not relaxed.
I'm sorry I'm spiteful
And I get hurt so easily.
I'm sorry for yesterday,
The day before.
For the times I'm argumentative.
That I don't like bowie.
Sorry for when I'm sad
And when I make you feel bad.
When I pity myself
And get jealous.
I'm sorry.

A puzzle piece doesn't fit
into a place that isn't theirs

So stop
Trying to fit
Into places you don't
Belong
Stop
Trying to squeeze
Into spaces you don't
Fit in
Stop
Altering yourself;
Cutting,
Trimming,
The pieces that make
You
Just to fit into skin
That isn't
Yours

Because no matter how hard you try

A puzzle piece never fits
into a place that isn't theirs

Believe me,
I've tried