Tonight,
It feels calm yet perturbed
Carrying this weight of regret
Fills my heart with malevolent beats of distress
Pumping motions of prying blood
Purple tint stains as it cuts
Screaming in pain but to no avail
Help is not needed but weary the mind
"You’ll seek what you’ll find
Beneath the shadows of imminent time.”

Tonight,
Verged with desire
To seek the forgotten light
Above the skies and among the stars
Hidden within this immense universe
Waiting as it pours
To the ground with glinting flames
For when I will get better
I will turn all this mess
Into beautiful shades of existence
Prior to what has held to evade norms
To change what was lost
To be claimed and found.

Tonight,
To feel what is certain
Yet leading to disappointment
Crying in vain to appease regret’s misery
I believe in fate
To a whole new life’s beginning
Displeasing life to graze within its end
Without it,
It has no meaning.

*Tonight,
The love we were once hurt to prevail
Learning to love and be loved again
And live in happiness until forever ends.

my years of efforts have gone to waste,
memories you brought never liked the taste

tell me how do i keep up with this pace,
to keep searching for what i have lost at the same place

she gazed upon her with sadness and grief,
when will the demons set her free

she sing lullabies beautiful melody,
a weapon she sees for her sweet katie

oh mama i wish it could be that easy

you came in from the cold dressed bold
under a black flag like isis on the road
to baghdad in a red ferrari going all john
le carré defecting with the little drummer
girl laurie in a deadly affair expecting
the honourable school boy when i'm used
to being a most wanted man -

now i'm no naïve and sentimental lover, baby
i'm the perfect spy and this ain't a small town
in germany but ich bin ein berliner, fraulein -
you better make this your last call for the dead

- it was (y)our kind of game playing
tinkering tailoring soldiering spying -
doodling smiley's people on the side
acting like absolute friends with fred
the constant gardener at the russia house
and red the tailor of panama
like a ***** with a straw up your nose
in the looking glass war
but if you do it again -

let me tell you a secret, pilgrim
i'll drop you where you lie -
it'll be a ****** of quality, baby
and that's a delicate truth

- you were our kind of traitor
on the blue mesa.

r ~ 11/14/14

i like john le carré
:)