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My heart is crippled
You could give it strength

"Why don't you?"
She bite her lip
Looked him up and down hungrily
"How long since you've had a woman?"

His eyes opened
He looked at her
Her question replayed in his mind
"Too long..."

Her heart gave a hard beat against her chest

Right answer.

Her gaze turned to his uncovered body
Her fingers ran down the hard length of his "friend"
She leaned forward
He gasped as she licked the head of his ****
She ran her tongue around the crown
And tasted him

Heat pooled at the apex of her thighs
The thought of him inside her
Taking her
Being with her
She wanted that

It was torture
Torture to wait like that
But she would
She wanted to know
To know him all over

She smiled
As he moaned at the feeling of her mouth around his ****
And ****** him
Moving back and forth
Her eyes closed in concentration

Time passed
Her hunger grew
As did his
With one movement she was thrown
Thrown on the bed
Shock covered her face
She looked at him noticing that gaze of hunger

She wanted to explode
Explode into a thousand tiny pieces
In his arms
And under the blissful ministrations of his tongue
And so she did
As soon as he laid upon her
She did

Their body's pressed together
Love flaring in the air
Lust flaring in the air
Finally letting emotions go
I just want you to know
that my favorite black shirt makes me look skinnier than I am
I never smile with teeth because my teeth aren't perfect
My eyelashes aren't that long without my mascara

I want you to know that I'm happy most days but I'm sad most nights
I take sleeping pills because I'm always worrying too much to sleep on my own
I cry alot. Mostly over my father's betrayal.

I want you to know that I love you more than myself
I find myself avoiding mirrors most days
I know you think I'm beautiful but I will never believe it.

I want you to know that on those really bad days when I can't even get out of bed, even when your hugs and holding my hand can't brighten my dead eyes, take me to the ocean and let the darkness of my heart be taken away each time the water meets the shore.
Now
In this moment
I am
Infinite

Before
Not too long ago
I was small
Just a small crow
With wings
Non-sprouted wings

I remember waking up
Waking up to a memory
Or a dream
I'm not for sure which
But in the memory
Or dream
I flew

I was not small
Not just a small crow
Not with wings
Not with non-sprouted wings

In the memory
Or dream
I was an eagle
And I flew
I flew out of that old oak
And soared over mountain tops
And through clouds
To a better tomorrow

Then I realized that I did
I did wake up to a memory
Not to a dream
It was real

Then i realized that
Now
In this moment
I am
Infinite
It started when i was 12. the nights seemed shorter. the days were long. the school bells ring. all my wrongs seemed right. all my rights seemed wrong.
It started with weird. and escalate quickly. The tears started to come. and i believed it was fate. I was insecure. But they said they only saw beauty. to as far as the eye can see. but yet... they took my dignity. They took my self love. and locked it away. thats when it all started. i wasnt me.
i know im not the only kid who feels like this. Everyone has their bully. everyone feels low sometimes. But with the words the throw. sometime hits us and sometimes will miss.
She got laughed at for her wheight.
She soon thought eating was a mistake. People teased her for not eating. She sat alone in the empty seating. She thought she was alone.
Then there was boy. who stood alone. no one by his side. He thought about all the times he cried. His mother never wanted him. his dad soon left. He was put onto a different family tree.  No in his life stayed.  
Time flew into eighth grade. the names the call him never went away. They kept laughing and laughing and he did fade. He talked therapist; that made him strange. He got depression pills. And got wrapped in a tidal wave of a full suicidal. and then he got called popper.
Us kids were so different the built us our own jail. so hail mary full of grace. where were you when i needed you. But i dont go to bed. its all in my head. they say. instead of helping. they hurt. and in all this jail. we still have secrets. these walls are the only things that see us at at our weekest.
Then we think like this. we think we are nothing and that no one will ever love us cause we are freaks. we must try. We try to build the sun for that one person. but they reject us. We see only wrong, cause we will always be wrong in someones eyes
But when you hear these names you must stop hearing. turn off all the sound. and be alone. Remember its all lies. Youre eyes will be tearing you will feel space bound. and feel a lone.
And when they break youre heart. you must wrap in a cast. take a pen. sign it. sign it. saying they are wrong. They have to be wrong. cause they live in the past. focus on what youve done. They lie to youre face. when they call you a name. tell them they lie. at least try. cause the first in hating something, means you once loved them. you once saw the beauty. then theyd throw you away. But how can they hate someone. when all there is, is beauty.
To this day, kids are still being called names and i dont think it will ever stop. there will always be blame. there will always be harm. but youre always going to be able, to see the beauty.
I try writing your name
I try to write it on paper,
But now that paper is missing.

I was told to never give up
So then I wrote it in the sand,
But not just any sand
It was sand that stood by the waves of my heart
I thought it would stay there forever
Then suddenly it got washed away

I had tried twice and lost both times,
But the third time is a charm
I wrote your name in my heart,
But not by the ocean shore of my heart
I wrote it right in the middle and till this day it stays there with all your love
She married for small prices of paper
Paper the color of green with numbers in the corners.

She did not marry for the way he laughed
Not because of how he helped others
Not because of the way he gazed into her eyes
Not because of how hard of a worker he was
Not because of how wonderful he was with kids
Not because of the way he warmed peoples hearts
Not even for the way he loved her

She married for small pieces of paper
Paper the color of green with numbers in the corners
But what about love?
A place of darkness covers me inside
I open my eyes and see that black is painted, stained on these four walls
I was keeped close in a corner where my hands are found chained
Chained to the darkness
The darkness that shall not set me free

Why did you put me here?
I have done nothing wrong
Yes I've made mistakes and yes I am imperfect, but so are you

The darkness thickens and the chains tighten
I feel my insides burn in everlasting flames
I have not done wrong
I am true and loving

Pour water for me please
Break these chains for me please
Turn a light on for me please
I have been bitten
Bitten by love
Not just any love
Skinny love
Love that is fragile
Love that is easily broken
Love that does not last
Love that leaves pain
Why couldn't it of been thick love?
Love that isn't fragile
Love that does not break easily
Love that is everlasting
Love that doesn't leave, but stays and gives joy
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