Such a sunny day unshielded from rain
and I have so many spent days alone
whispering to cornered phantoms
some of ago, others taunt and appease
to melodies of utter bitter sweets
If I could turn the clocks back I would
walk back to that perfected day
standing right there beside you
but love is not unconditional
and many people die drowned in it
trying in resolutions to make it work
and you could never fight for me
neither stand up shielded in misery
and my heart is ice cold and frozen
unable to feel, digressed from love
because in my eyes, it’s a waste of time
and my soul cries with an incurable ail
as if hit with a nail,unbailed a thousand times
deep within I stand as an unpolished iron
rusted and collected in sediments
ores of amber slime tapped as a ****
but the loathe on your skin tells it all
and all I wanted is to be better friends
but in your eyes, all is faint and insecure
and the cyclones of the past outweigh the present

I’ll sleep when time rises
In the quiet
Of Saturdays.

And as heaviness weighs
My web-veined lids,
I’ll breath in

The silence that
Is morning.

this humdrum summer.
i knew you as someone
who was never anywhere for too long,
sorta bohème so to speak.
so maybe now you are back in montréal.
how naive to believe space & time will grant you mercy.
i envy you for that arrogance.

the here and now sits on my memories like dust.

would it have changed anything –

never mind.

days in parks & forests & meadows. the honey bees were busy then.
we roamed through every supermarket like it was a ******* carnival.
and love,
it was the joy being each others witness.
this fever dream that is the mundane now.

if there was a way to look at you,
beyond a lens of reminiscence,
beyond the script of hurt.

this humdrum summer.

they say TIME HEALS EVERYTHING and i smile.
i don't feel the warmth of the sun anymore
but how could i forget that it touched me.

Mother tell me,
who do your eyes meet in the mirror?
wolf woman wife
little girl
and perhaps ghost.
Caddy did you love them
yes
yes but when they touched me I died
yes but when they touched me I died and was resurrected because a woman dies but comes back another just a change of costume so we can walk in our shadows and strut and fret again.
 
mother why is the mirror always blurry,
and why are the rooms all empty in this body
fortress sanctuary
that is made by the magic of transformation
Caddy the rooms may be empty but can’t you hear the music?
bird in a cage,
and its songs about longing to feel human.

With the footsteps of determination and friendship,
together we will carve beauty's eternal pathway.

As the music tantalises
something tricks the wick of my mind
through the pattern of the eruptive wind
besides the reeds of the adventure
in the swampy zones where I find the way
hiding the inner soul as peace partakes

As the sunshine gazes
the outer lights seems a hundred years
unreachable yet so lovely and visible
there is a pinch of it that never disappears
and it tears all the skin to the kins of bones
depths with the unpenetratable glass

The loneliness is so tasteful
away from any eventful unsteadiness
it scratches the ledge of the window sill
hoping to leap and fly to it’s freedom
and it’s shattered state is a sacrifice
unable to find it’s way home