Ten cents to a dime that this tired heart of mine
will keep beating in time to her tune and
very soon we will be
in complete harmony.
Because,
she said so.

I've penned hard-edged words often,
You being the only thing that softens
Them up.

I give you all my
skin my hair my
flesh and my bones
Wasting no time
you bring test tubes
to change me into
something you like

I promised you I'd take you away
From here one day
And that's a promise I intend to keep.
If given the chance,
I would take you with me on my every daily endeavor
And I would kiss you with every passing second
To make up for all the ones you deserved
But didn't receive
When I was just a little girl
And the world was turning it's back on you
So harshly.
And I would be criticized
For my loving you;
Too wide of an age gap,
To vast of a difference
But I am closer to you
That I have ever been
With anyone else.
I will take you to the beaches of California
I have never seen
And I will make love to you
In the crisp Colorado air,
So long as you're willing to run with me.
We can go to New York
And skip rocks in the pond
In Central Park where Holden Caulfield
Almost drowned himself because he was drunk,
But not quite as drunk as I perpetually am
On your excellence.
Maybe we could go to the Natural History Museum
And we could look at the really cool Indian statues
That emulate my love for you
By never changing.

Wherever it is you want me to go
I will follow you with no questions asked
So long as when I'm finally able to save you
From this wretched place,
You will take my hand and save yourself
With me.

I know I've been sent before
To scream and proclaim my innocence
But I've always been the one
Who people turn to
When they don't know where they are.
I'll press my hands against the wall
You've built around your voice
And I'll tear it down gently
If you'll allow it.
I've always been an expected saviour,
But you're the kind of person
I wouldn't mind saving once in a while.
I'll never learn to accept
Your humble praise even though I know
Just that will number my days.
I'm not a peacock,
But I'd like to believe that in the beginning
And even now
I had something beautiful
That benefited you in some way.

I'd rather not use your name
Because it makes you too real
Such a personal label,
A stamp if you will.

So please stay anonymous,
Remain ever so mysterious,
And I can keep a safe distance
From these experiences.

It has been
awhile.
My tongue went
missing,
a tape recorder
of things people
already said shoved
into its place.
The blood in my being
is heated with the love of my significant,
without him my heart is
cold.

there are many types of love
while I might feel phileo towards him and
eros towards her and storge towards Her
I might feel agape towards you
and I would say that the difference between romance and friendship
while I thought it was ***, for a long time,
is not- it is something more, intangible
an inseperation between souls
a terrible desire to be one-
a necessity of agape between the two
and a feeling that you will be insufficient
without it.