I have sketched you in so many ways,
with dots and lines
and shadows and lights
and covered in colours
or in black and white.

I've sketched you as a prince,
I've sketched you as a beggar,
I've sketched you as a lover,
I've sketched you as a hater.

I've adjusted myself
to several graphite scales
so I can shade your flaws
into fairy tales...

you have been my muse,
both master and apprentice,
you have been obsession
for my sleepless senses...

But even if your image
has haunted me for long,
you have never been
just mine to belong...

so I'll just keep on drawing
and sketching you, my all
so I can have you near
when nights are getting cold...

sandstrom
we  can't walk

cliff
we can't pass

Ocean
we can't swim

for love it won't interfree
we unite in a dream

he says “we end nicely. with a hug and a kiss. we end before it gets bad so we can never hate each other.
and in five years i’m going to call you
and ask you to marry me. please
say yes.” and i’m laying in the bed of a boy
that broke my heart and i’m
crying and saying “in five years
i will be just like every other girl
you’ve loved. i will know better by then.”
and he doesnt reply so
eventually i say “i could have
loved you forever if you had
let me. you win. you win, you win,
you win.” and instead of
saying anything he pulls
me close for a second and it feels like normal,
like maybe everything is going to be okay, but every
inch between us is cold we
can both feel it on our skin. “this doesn’t feel like
winning. i will love you for the rest
of my life. this doesn’t feel like winning.”

Write until your
hand cramps
so you can no longer
hold the pen

Write until the ink runs dry
and you have no more refills

Write if you have to beg paper
maybe then to beg
a little bit more

Write until you get it all down
Then revise re-write re-edit
to get it all done again

Write until you hear
the words you wrote
spoken by someone
who maybe might care

Write by day by night
By shadows and
by candlelight

Never give up
on the will
and the way

Never give up
Your right...

to Write

-R.

(9.16.17)
-LA

I don't finish
Drawings
I'm too afraid
To mess up
The things I love