you,
desolate shadow of existence
Sexed up and used by their persistence,
You'r admirations and aspirations
Are the apple cores
Planting seeds in my belly
Despite my resistance.

I pledge allegiance,
to the flag,
of a united state
that consists of stock market ******,
politics,
****, and hate.

One nation,
without a vision,
under a god,
who dominates all religion.
A "majestic" nation,
who defends itself with nuclear fission.
If you are looking for liberty,
you better keep wishin'.

"Indivisible"
but devised into fifty states of gray.
Freedom of speech itself,
can deprive you of what you need to say.
**** your liberty, just because you can ******* my integrity ,
doesn't mean you can get the best of me.
Just because I dress like this,
doesn't mean I'm a communist.

The heart wants what the heart wants. The brain butts in and **** blocks our most valued, raw emotion. These feelings that could only originate from the pumping muscle in your chest that hurts after hearing tom petty or watching your favorite TV show's last episode fade away into the sunset.
   In a rare scenario where a man rolls off of his lady friend and has lit his nightcap cigarette, and STILL feels the sharp pang of love despite his release,  the man should ******* follow his heart, and become that cliche that 15 year old girls get wet over. Stay with that woman, I don't care if you've killed, pillaged, or ravaged, whether you deserve that pretty girl or not…you chase after her. Don't listen to you're head, you're head is what makes your **** hard. Follow your ******* heart, because I swear on my lucky cigarette that your mind (along with your ****) will give out long before your heart will.

Tipsy Trixie likes to do blow.
Coffee, blow.
    Lunch, blow.
       Shopping, blow.
For Trixie, that's how life goes,
A long line of genocide
    Going up into her nose
Before a cold, bare floor catches Trixie's clothes,
in an attempt to add to her stash
Of street corner cash
All wrapped up in rolls.

Selling herself short just to finance the blow,
She'll soon snort herself cold,
or maybe she'll get **** rich and forever swim in her snow.

But I'm no dreamer,
And trixie's a coke *****.
Another street corner dime
Just looking to score.
When this winter blows over
She'll be sniffing for more.

It was the darkest night
But you were there, right by my side
Made me love things I always thought I’d hate
A few bad things happened to change

I’ll never tell you about my problems anymore,
I think it’s for the best or I’d do it some more
But even in the brightest light,
Evil comes and then the night
Devours all that you can see,
Taken what is left of me
I’m not the same person you loved
There’s barely anything left

The truth is, I was never meant for the light anyways
The sunlight only ever brought me pain
And when the darkness came, it never left me the same
At best, I like it a cloudy time,
At worst with pouring rain
But it always seemed to turn to night
One thing that gets worse, it’s always the pain…

The night was something I never liked
But I seem to make it myself
I hate myself for it
I never thought I’d be here, in this place
I kind of wish there was some pouring rain
Cause sunlight is too bright for an eye that is always used to the night
I wish my eyes would adjust,
But it’s been too long for me
Perfection in daylight…
Something I’ll never see
I wish I could stay with the sunset always in my eyes
But it always passes too quickly,
And I wish I’d die
Never, never, never
I wish things could just be alright

I know I ruined thing between us,
It’ll never be the same, cause we’ll never trust
And I won’t try to get it back
Cause I don’t deserve it
And I’ll never try to get back your love,
Even though it’s something that I could never have enough

When I was in pain,
You made things right
When god seemed far away,
You were in sight
And even though I’m afraid of the dark,
You were always the perfect night

Dipped in grease
and drowned in ****
Society gives back,
but only to the pegs that fit.

•
Our love,

                Are like the stars and moon,



                                   Colliding in love and romance,
    
But in the end,



                                                 They just explode,



Leaving shattered smithereens behind.




                           © Earl Jane
                             ♥ E.J.C.S.

If you’re listening to this right now hoping to hear something new,
Hoping to hear something that might inspire you
Or give you that rush you’ve been looking for…
Just…
Keep looking…

We’ve all said it before...
That we’re looking for something…
That we’re just not sure what it is...

And I think that -for the most part- we deserve that.
That uncomfortable mystery.
I mean…
What’s the point of reading a book if you already know how it ends?
If you knew what you were looking for,
There’s no adventure in the search for it.
So why is it that every time I see a sunset...
My gut reaction is to run away from it?
Like I’m trying to repent for wasting my day but I don’t know why.
It didn’t feel like I was wasting it until it was over and by then…
The sun was already setting.

Let me try to make more sense of this…

So you’re 8 years old.
Not once in those 8 years have you ever worried
That you won’t be enough,
That you won’t amount to anything.
In those 8 years you’ve been in spaceships and castles.
You’ve gone from training wheels to treasure maps.
Streetlights were your curfew
And the sunset never seemed like an ending.
You went to bed that night and woke up 10 years later in a panic Looking for something you lost the day before.
The world was falling apart
And the sun hadn’t even made an appearance yet.
Your spaceships have landed
And your treasure maps turned out to be dead ends...

The swing set couldn’t get you out of orbit
And you didn’t find what you were looking for
In that hole in the back yard.

You’re 18…
Everything feels like the ending of the story
And you don’t even know the plot yet.
You start drawing treasure maps again
And everyone thinks you’re crazy,
But all you’re really trying to do find is what you lost so long ago
And when they tell you to just retrace your steps…
None of the footprints look like you own.

You start running in reverse.
Whether it be to get away from yourself or who you thought you were, It doesn’t matter.
The point is that you’re looking for something.
You start dusting off old treasure maps and try to revisit the stars.
What once was your castle
Is now just an old blanket next to the couch in the living room.
You start to panic.
Frantically you search for the moment of impact
When your rocket returned home
And the lid of the treasure chest slammed shut.
But you won’t find it.
It’s not there anymore.
You start to notice how empty your gut feels,
Yet at the same time so heavy.

So you’re 18 years old.
You’ve started to worried that you won’t be enough.
That you won’t amount to anything.
In these 18 years you’ve been in spaceships and castles.
You’ve gone from training wheels to taking tests.
Streetlights are no longer your curfew
And every sunset is a different ending.
You’ll go to bed tonight
And wake up 10 years from now in a panic
Looking for something you lost the day before.
The world never stopped falling apart
And the sun hasn’t even made an appearance yet.
Your spaceships have landed
And your treasure maps turned out to be dead ends...

And I think that -for the most part- we deserve this.
This uncomfortable mystery.
I mean…
What’s the point of reading a book if you already know how it ends?
If you knew what you were looking for,
There’s no adventure in the search for it.
So why is it that every time I see a sunset...
My gut reaction is to run away from it?
Maybe because I know I’m still searching for something
And my time is running out.
And everyday when I wake up,
Panicked,
Looking for something I lost the day before
The world starts falling apart…
But by then…
The sun is already setting.

We’ve all said it before...
That we’re looking for something…
That we’re just not sure what it is…

And at the end of that day,
What you're looking for could be right in front of you,
Plain as the sunset,
But you'll never know unless you keep your eyes open,
And keep looking.

So if you’re listening to this right now hoping to hear something new,
Hoping to hear something that might inspire you
Or give you that rush you’ve been looking for…
Just…
Keep looking…